One for Sorrow
by Blossomangel85
Summary: Be aware - Spoilers for season 10, episode 7. Minor Character death What if it was Catherine who wanted to make sure Steve got back to Hawaii after his devastating news? Can this tragedy reignite their love story? Joe's death lit the flame, can this tragedy finally let it burn?
1. Chapter 1

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll**

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter 1**

**Catherine Rollins POV**

She came to Washington, DC as soon as she had heard about what happened. If she had known, she would have been there with him, standing next to him and not only holding his hand, but also doing whatever it took to bring Doris home. She deeply regretted she wasn't able to be there to stand by him over the last eight weeks, but she was here now and that is what mattered.

Word had quickly spread about Doris McGarrett's death and though they both worked at the same agency, it wasn't another agent whom had come to her and confirmed the reports. It was none other than Danny Williams. He managed to find a way to track her down through Wade Gutches and she was on her way to DC quicker than she could hang up the phone.

The last time she had seen him in person was after they had parted ways at the airstrip, however they had spoken on the phone quite a few times since then including face time as well. Standing outside the door to his hotel room, she took a breath in and sighed before knocking. She wasn't sure what to expect, but when he answered the door, what she saw was a broken man, a man whom had lost so much in his life already.

A man that had put his own life on the line so many times, a man that had already buried his father, his aunt, and his mentor, but now had to bury his mother. Steve was always so heroic, so stoic and never blinked a eye at emotional moments usually, however the moment he answered the door, she saw that stoic look break in front of her and she couldn't help but move towards him, pulling him into her arms as the door closed automatically behind them as his hand removed from the door frame to wrap around her own small frame.

Her mouth close to his ear, her fingertips tracing around his back, one hand moving up to thread her fingers in his hair as she embraced him. "I'm so sorry Steve", her voice was low and gently, almost a whisper, afraid if she spoke above a whisper, it would give away how close she was to breaking. She had seen him soon after his father had died, and after Joe White was killed, but this.. It was almost too hard for her to bare. Those words seemed to bring him back to life a little and she felt him tighten his hold on her like he couldn't bare the thought of losing her again as well.

Standing there in the hall, rocking them back and forth as they held each other, she could feel his pain. She had not lost either of her parents and yet she could feel the pain radiating through her body as if it were one of her own parents, she knew Doris, she had respected Doris even though she knew the pain she had caused her husband, son and daughter, and yet she could understand that though he had a complex and complicated history with her, she was his mother and he would always love her no matter what.

Pulling away slightly, remaining in his arms, but able to gaze into his haunted eyes, she used her thumb to wipe his tears away, "Danny called me, he wanted to be here, but was taking care of Charlie while Rachel was away on business, he wanted me to make sure the 'animal'", they both had a little chuckle "his words by the way, got back to Hawaii safety, so I am here with you till you are able to claim Doris's body and take her home back to Hawaii and I am not taking no for an answer, you hear me Sailor, we do this together, I'm with you till the end".

**Author's Notes. **

**I am so sorry I haven't been active on my other fictions. I do promise to continue them at some point, I am just in the process of re-reading the last couple of chapters of the few Hawaii five-o ones I was doing. In the meantime, after watching the latest episode, I got some inspiration to change it up a bit and slightly change the end of the episode where Danny comes to Steve's hotel room. Instead it is Catherine to come make sure he gets home to Hawaii. It isn't a continuation of my Winds of Change but when I do eventually get up to date, I may add this in there as well. I really hope you guys like this, I am thinking of doing Steve's POV in chapter 2. **


	2. Chapter 2

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll**

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter 2**

**Steve McGarrett's POV**

His heart was swimming in grief, and his mind filled with unanswered questions.. Questions he knew he would never get now.. Flying back to Washington, he knew he would be there another several days for debriefings and waiting for them to release Doris's body back to him. As conflicted as he was, and as complex as his relationship with his mother was, he knew where he needed to bury his mother..

As his parents were married, Doris McGarrett was eligible to be buried in the National Cemetery at where his father was buried and that was the plan, to take her back home to Hawaii and have a funeral service there. It broke his heart thinking of Mary and Joanie and how in the world was he going to break the news to them that their mother and grandmother was gone.

He wasn't sure he could, but he knew that the news was better off coming from him then anyone else. He was going to call Mary later the next morning and talk to her about it. He hated having to do it over the phone, but he wasn't sure if he would be able to get her to Washington without her wondering what was going on.

Sitting in the hotel room, he was on his fourth beer of the evening and though he had showered, he hadn't been able to go through the motions of shaving his beard off yet. That beard was a symbol of the last eight weeks, it reminded him of what his mission had been, to try hard to save his mother and he didn't want to let that go yet.

Junior had offered to stay with him, but Steve knew that he needed to get back to Hawaii so he said he was fine staying on his own, but little did he know that Danny had arranged for a special visitor to stay with him while he was staying in Hawaii. He had been alone for the better part of eight weeks and Danny wanted to be there, but couldn't, so he got the next best thing.

Hearing the knock on the door, he stood up, unsure as to who it could be. He hadn't told anyone besides Danny what hotel he was staying at, so he wasn't expecting at all to see Catherine at the door when he answered it. He had tried to keep it in, but as soon as he saw her, that stoic stance he had broke and he found himself in her arms, his own hand letting go of the door frame as he wrapped his arms around her petite frame.

Those words, her voice, it reduced him to tears.. He had lost so much. He had lost Freddy, his father, his Aunt, Joe and now his own mother. He had lost Catherine too many times as well in his life and now having her here in his arms, he tightened his grip on her slightly, not wanting to lose her again as well. He couldn't bare to lose anyone else especially Catherine.

He managed a chuckle when she mentioned Danny calling him an animal and wanting to make sure he got back to Hawaii.. "I can see him doing that actually". He sighed softly, and nodded his head, pulling away to grab two beers out of the fridge and then taking her hand and walking her over to the couch, both of them sitting side by side, "I'm glad it's you..", She smiled softly and took the lid off her bottle and had a sip, nodding her head. "Of course Steve, I'm always going to be here for you, you can count on that".

**Author's Notes**

Thank you so much for the follows, favourites and comments, I appreciate it as always. I am sorry my other fictions were put on the back burner but I will get back to them all. I just felt I needed to do this one as well. As always, your love and support is always very much appreciated and I am always so flattered to hear you all enjoying my Hawaii five-o stories, in particular my McRoll ones. They are my favourite to read and write.

**SteveMcGarrett Lover**

Thank you for the welcome back. I most definitely will be getting back into doing those stories, I have missed it and the title for the Winds of Change was based on the song Wind of Change, so whenever I listen to that song now, I am brought back to my story so it is time to revisit it and my other ones as well. I am glad you have enjoyed this one as much. Thank you, my mother is doing well, cancer free finally and though she still has some side effects left over from radiation and chemo, she is doing well. I'm well too, just been busy focusing on getting her well and now things are a bit more back to normal, I can hopefully focus on these more.

**Cath**

Thank you so much Cath, I am glad you have enjoyed this one. I most certainly will continue on Winds of Change, there has been a lot going on in my life, but I am hoping to focus more on these stories.

**Laura**

Thank you so much Laura, I am glad you are enjoying my stories, including this one. I love Danny so much, he is amazing and their friendship is awesome, but I do agree. It should have been Catherine there for him rather than Danny in this instance. I am certainly going to work towards getting Winds of Change back up and going so you haven't seen the last of that at all.


	3. Chapter 3

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll**

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter 3**

Sitting here with her, he knew here was a reason why he was never able to make it work with another woman and that is because of the woman that sat beside him, the woman that whenever he needed her, stopped whatever it was she was doing and came to be by his side. He loved her, and he knew he would never feel any differently, and he didn't want her to go this time.. He wanted her to come back to Hawaii this time.. He wanted her to prove she was different than his mother, that she wouldn't walk away from a future with him for her career again.

Searching his gaze, she was worried about him.. "You okay Sailor?" This was the man she loved, the only man she had ever given her heart to.. Even Billy Harrington didn't get her heart, the only man that honour went to was the broken man sitting beside her.. She knew he wasn't okay, but she had to ask anyway.. Even if it was to get him to open up and talk to her about how he was feeling. "Define okay for me Catherine?" He was broken, this woman was his mother, the woman that gave birth to him and he didn't want to accept she was now gone forever.

"You know Steve, at the end of the day, She was trying to do something good". She rested her head on his shoulder, careful of his arm and sighed softly. He shifted in his seat, leaning back on the couch, wishing he could use his arm to cuddle her, "Yeah", his words were broken and unsure.

"I just wish she realised all she had to do was get on an airplane and come home", he added in a softer tone. "From the minute that woman walked out of my life, the only thing I've wanted is her back in it", he voice breaking at the words, admitting for the first time that all he has ever wanted is to have Doris back in his life permanently. "So, am I okay?, I don't know if I'm okay, but I do know that none of this is on our terms."

Sipping on the beer, she nodded, asking as she put took the lip of the beer from her mouth, "None of what Steve?", asking curiously as she did her best to comfort him, even though she wanted to break as well. She knew Doris, she had a relationship with that woman, worked with her, saved her and was still hopelessly in love with her son. "Life", he put the beer bottle to his mouth and sipped on it it, looking over at her, "we never really get to choose how it's gonna look, only what we do with the information when we get it".

Sighing softly, he turned slightly to face her, "This whole Five-o thing started with me burying my father, then Joe White last year, now my mother", taking a breath, he sniffled and held back another onslaught of tears. "So I don't know how I feel, but I do know that we don't life on our terms Cath. It's life on life's terms or not at all". What he left unsaid for now but wanted to say was 'Come home with me'. Life was hard enough to deal with, and all he wanted was to have her home in Hawaii with him.

Instead, he took the opportunity to down the rest of his beer and then stood up to head to the bathroom to relieve himself and shave his beard off. Part of moving on meant leaving behind the last eight weeks, and if he had Catherine with him, Mary and Joanie, as well as his five-o family, he knew he could do it. As he closed the door to the bathroom, he smiled softly, "Thank you for being here Cath, it means so much to me".

**Author's Notes**

Thank you so much for the follows, favourites and comments, I appreciate it as always. I am sorry my other fictions were put on the back burner but I will get back to them all. I just felt I needed to do this one as well. As always, your love and support is always very much appreciated and I am always so flattered to hear you all enjoying my Hawaii five-o stories, in particular my McRoll ones. They are my favourite to read and write.


	4. Chapter 4

** One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll**

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter 4 - Danny's POV**

Life was not fair, and it never worked out the way you wanted it too.. That he was sure of.. Sure he was starting to move forward with his relationship with Rachel and he was enjoying it, but at the same time, life always had to kick one of them till they were down.. If not him, then his best friend Steve.. On his way home from picking Charlie up from school, his phone rang, and it was Junior..

It was like the world had closed in on him.. He couldn't breath, and he had to stop and take deep breaths and calm himself so that Charlie didn't notice anything off. Both Grace and Charlie missed Steve when he was away and in the last year, he had been away twice for a long period of time. He didn't want to tell Charlie the news till Steve was at home if possible because he knew Charlie would worry.

Steve had gone along with Doris's body to Washington, DC and Junior being the loyal man he was went with him, though Junior was telling him that he was on his way back to Hawaii because Steve had been adamant that he didn't need anyone with him.. Adamant his ass, he knew that Steve shouldn't be alone now, and he would go if he could, but Rachel was away on business, and Grace was in her final year of school and he didn't want to put her in charge of her little brother when she was focusing on school work and applying to colleges.

Instead, he decided to phone in a favour and get Wade Gutches on the line. He knew of one other person that Steve would welcome in during this time, and it was Catherine Rollins. He knew he had been trying too hard to find Steve the perfect date, the perfect match when she was right in front of their noses all this time. No wonder why he couldn't make it work with any of these other women, and that was because Steve still had feelings for Catherine.

Tracking her down on his own would be impossible, but it was why he contacted Wade, because he knew Wade could find anyone, no matter how deep they might be undercover and he knew Catherine and knew that she wouldn't want to be anywhere else while Steve was going through this loss. "Cath.. god, it's so good to hear your voice..", he was now watching Charlie playing at the playground as he made the phone call to Catherine.

"It's Steve… I'm not sure if you heard, his Mom was killed in Mexico.. He is in Washington… I'd go, but I have Charlie and I think it should be you Hun". Crossing his legs as he smiled and waved to Charlie, he nodded, listening to her and then he was thanking her and telling her how much she meant to them all, and that he hoped he would see her again soon, meaning he hoped she came home with Steve back to Hawaii.

Just as he hung up the phone, Grace had sat down beside him, leaning her head on his shoulder, "Uncle Steve is gonna be okay isn't he?", having heard half of the conversation, "You know Uncle Steve.. He is an animal.". He chuckled and then moved his head to kiss her temple, pulling her in closer as they watched Charlie. Taking a breath, he became more serious. "He is strong Grace, and he might be a bit broken when he comes back home, but together, we can put him back together".

**Author Notes**

Thank you for the support once again, it means a lot to me and it does help encourage me to keep writing and moving forward with these fictions. I do find this one is much easier and quicker to write since I am not going overboard with the chapters and where I would normally have a longer chapter, I am breaking them up into shorter ones. I hope that is not an issue for anyone, I will always make sure I do get to the heart of the matter and if it needs to be longer, I will go a bit longer on it.

**Texas50Fan. **

Thanks for your candour, I appreciate you being honest with me on this and I do agree and disagree with you. I agree that Danny was the right choice to be with him, however I also think that Catherine would have been the right choice as well. While Catherine has lied to him a couple of times, and has made her CIA career the priority, I think deep down they both still love each other and he obviously called her when Joe was killed, trusted her enough to take out Greer when he couldn't so that means something. I love the episode's ending exactly how it was, I am just writing it from this point of view for myself as a McRoll lover and all the other McRoll lovers who would have liked to see this version occur. I do hope you continue to read this fiction, but I won't be offended if you don't.

**SteveMcGarrettlLover**

Thank you so much for the two reviews, I am so happy that you can hear him saying and feeling those emotions. It makes me feel like I am doing something right. I have done a chapter from Danny's POV, however it is not as he is waiting for them to return home, not just yet anyway, I will do that later on, maybe do a chapter from each of the five-o teams perspective as well, knowing how much Steve would be hurting. I hope you enjoy the two new chapters as well, I am trying to continue that trend for now.


	5. Chapter 5

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll**

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter 5 **

Knocking on the bathroom door before she opened it slightly, she smiled softly when she saw him gaze at her through the mirror, his face mostly clean shaven, just a few little bits of stubble here and there, "I hope I'm not interrupting, but I really need a shower". She stopped near him and wrapped her arms around him from behind, her chin on his shoulder, "We'll get through this together Steve, I promise".

Once he was finished cleaning his face off, he put some aftershave on and rubbed his, splashing more water over his face and then turned the tap off and turned around, his back resting on the sink, his arms pulling her closer, "It's gonna take some time, but I know we will Cath."

He knew what he wanted, he wanted to kiss her, but he wanted more than just to have one night with her when he was grieving. He wanted her, to build a home and a life with her. They had been together on and off for so many years, he felt like he wasn't whole without her. After losing so many people in his life, he didn't want to lose her again, he wanted stability and to feel safe.

They were so close now, how did they get so close, his heart was pounding in his chest, and he knew if he didn't take this opportunity now, he might not get one again for a while, so he leant in and pressed his lips to hers and kissed her softly, taking his time to map out her mouth with his tongue before pulling away just as quickly. "I'm sorry, I just couldn't help myself".

Looking into his eyes, Catherine smiled softly, and nodded, "Don't be sorry, I'm glad you did". She kissed him again once more and then pulled away from him, her hand resting on his cheek for a moment, "How bout while I'm showering, you order in some Chinese? Then we can get some sleep, I don't know about you but I'm exhausted". She saw the hesitation in his eyes for a moment, and she reassured him, "I'll be out shortly", nodding her head.

Watching him as he walked out of the bathroom and closed the door behind him, it was the hardest thing she had done in a long time. She leant against the closed bathroom door and sighed, running her hands through her hair, while on the other side of the door, Steve did the same. All she wanted was to ask him to join her in the shower with her, but he was grieving right now and she didn't want to take advantage of his grief even if she knew he wanted it as well.

It was long overdue, but it was time to leave the CIA, and to put Steve first, to put their relationship before anything else. While she did love being in the CIA, she loved Steve more and she enjoyed the home they had created in Hawaii.. It was time to go home to the one person she always felt home with, no matter where they were.

**Author Notes**

Thank you for the support once again, it means a lot to me and it does help encourage me to keep writing and moving forward with these fictions. I do find this one is much easier and quicker to write since I am not going overboard with the chapters and where I would normally have a longer chapter, I am breaking them up into shorter ones. I hope that is not an issue for anyone, I will always make sure I do get to the heart of the matter and if it needs to be longer, I will go a bit longer on it.


	6. Chapter 6

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter 6**

Walking out of the bathroom, her hair still a little wet, but drying it as finishing towering her hair off and smiled sadly. The Chinese food had just gotten there a few minutes before she finished in the bathroom and he was sitting on the couch with the food out on the table. She hated seeing him in so much pain, it was something she would never get used to but she vowed to be the one to take all that pain away.

It wouldn't be easy, but she wouldn't stop trying till she was able to find a way to help him heal, even if it was one day at a time. As she sat down next to him, she leaned in and kissed his cheek softly before grabbing one of the Chinese box's, and picking up the chopsticks and digging in.. "Have you spoken to Mary yet?", She knew that would be a hard conversation have, having to tell her that their mother was gone for good.

Growing up, had a different life than Steve and Mary, her parents never walked away from her or sent her away, and were always there for her whenever she needed them, even today, so though she couldn't understand how a parent could ever do that to her children, and she would never truly understand the pain that both Steve and Mary had gone through because of their mother's choices, she would never undermine their feelings. It can't be easy for them.

He shook his head as he took a bite of his food and once he swallowed what was in his mouth, he sighed softly. "No, not yet.. I don't know how to even tell Mare to be honest. I know she was devastated when Mom took off again, I just don't how how she will take the news, and Joanie.. Mom had spend a bit of time with Mary and Joan in L.A and she loved her grandma, She is old enough to understand death now, It's gonna be hard".

Catherine nodded her head and leant forward to reach for the beer and took a sip, "We can fly out to Los Angeles, let her know in person.. I know you didn't like having to tell her about your Dad over the phone, especially because you were still overseas, so maybe we can do it right this time, maybe even see if she wants to come back to Washington and then fly onto Hawaii so we can arrange the funeral with her there".

As she had been speaking, he really listened to her and it was something he should do. As much as he didn't want to see her when she broke down, because he hated seeing his sister in pain, he knew it was the best option. He was there for her when Aunt Deb had told them about the cancer and now he needed to be there for her now. "I was struggling to think of a way to tell her, I was planning on telling her over the phone, but it nearly killed me to tell her about Dad that way and we weren't nearly as close as we are now, so I think that is a good plan".

It helped that in all of this, she had said 'we'. That simple word made his heart ache with hope, knowing she was with him, she was his lifeline and he didn't know how to ever thank her for this, or thank Danny for finding her. Finishing their food in silence, Catherine stood up, tidying up the left overs, putting them in the bin, before pulling her laptop out of her bag and sliding herself into his side, snuggling into him as she looked at some flights for the morning. "When do you need to be debriefed?", she asked him, knowing it took nearly five hours to fly from Washington to Los Angeles. "Not till the day after tomorrow".

Nodding her head, she saw a flight that left at Washington at five in the morning and then a return flight at twelve midday Los Angeles time which would get them back to Washington around eight that next evening. "You okay with leaving early in the morning?, five am? There is a return flight at twelve L.A time, we don't need to book that till we know if Mary and Joan will be joining us". He nodded his head, and stifled a yawn at the same time, "Sounds okay to me, now why don't we get some sleep since we have a big day ahead of us". He took her hand as he stood up and lead her to the queen bed, both of them getting ready to get some shut eye though Steve knew he wouldn't be able to sleep much that night knowing he would relive every moment of his mother's death.

**Author's Notes. **

I am so grateful that I have so many people that love reading my stories. When I set out to write them, I don't usually have a bigger picture in mind, other then having the main two characters be happy and together but I am really proud of these next two chapters. I would like to eventually get Mary to move back to Hawaii with Joan in one of my fictions, maybe this could be the event that brings her back home for good, wanting to stay close to the only biological family she has left.

**SteveMcGarrettLover**

I am so pleased you are enjoying this story, I am enjoying writing it. I am always happy to take my readers suggestions and I love Wade as well, he is a favourite of mine as well, even from the first time we met him when he was still in the Navy. I am glad to not keep you waiting as long with this one, I am enjoying getting back into the swing of writing and these shorter chapter do make it easier to focus and not feel like procrastinating . I couldn't leave it without a kiss, I just don't want to do too much too soon, he is still grieving. I might do the notebook suggestion when they are back in Hawaii, and maybe one night he can't sleep, so she suggests that.

**Guest**

Thank you so much, I am glad you are enjoying this story. I'm trying to get this updated as much as I possibly can.


	7. Chapter 7

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 7 Mary's POV**

**Los Angeles - 8:00am **

Mary hadn't been expecting to see her brother of all people show up on her door step at such an early hour of the morning and especially with Catherine with him, but one look at their faces, Steve's in particular showed her it wasn't a social call at all. Once they had all said greeted each other and she had hugged both Steve and Catherine, she ushered them in and closed the door, turning to face them with her arms crossed, "So, what's going on Steve? Not that I am not happy to see you, but you normally call when you are gonna come visit us".

Joan had a day off school that day, teacher conferences and so she was still in bed asleep and Mary had taken the day off work to take care of her since her next door neighbour that usually watched Joan for Mary was away visiting family. "I think it's best we sit down Mary". He was nervous and he didn't know how too break the news to her.. Mary had been following the news that a drug bust had been made in Mexico and a CIA agent had been killed, however she never stopped to think it was her mother.

"Steve, Cath.. what's going on? You are starting to scare me now". Her heart rate was going up. This must be big for Steve to come all this way from Hawaii to see her, and with Catherine in tow, "Mary, just please, sit down for me, please". He pleaded with her, his eyes forming their puppy dog look that she could never refuse, and she sat down on the couch, her arms still folded against her chest as Steve and Catherine both took a seat, Steve next to her on the couch and Catherine in the adjacent seat.

Sighing softly, he thought carefully how he was going to word this, and he looked towards Catherine, who nodded to him that she was there to take over if he needed her too, giving him a look of encouragement that yes he could do this. "I'm not sure if you have seen the reports, of a drug bust in Mexico yesterday", He stopped for a moment as she took that in and nodded that she had, "Yeah, of course, it's been all over the news, a CIA agent was killed, what's that got to do with us?" The agents name had not been released to the media, and so at the time she never thought of it being anyone she knew.

As soon as she said that, there was something inside her that clicked, and the look on Steve's face only confirmed her suspicions.. Her hands, shaking and trembling went to her mouth as her eyes widened, spilling out with tears and falling down her cheeks, "No, Steve.. No.. Don't say it was Mom, please Steve, don't, I can't". Steve moved closer and pulled her to his side, and rubbed her arm with his good arm, his own tears falling down his face, his throat closing up with a lump, and he held her as she fell apart, "I'm sorry Mare, I'm so sorry Sis".

Catherine felt a lump forming in her own throat witnessing this exchange, wiping her own tears with her hands as she sniffled. She couldn't imagine how hard this was for both of them, she still had both her parents and so the thought of losing her parents, she couldn't even fathom it, let alone be able to comprehend what damage that did to a child, no matter what the age. Just as Steve had started to explain what happened and that he was there when it went down, Joan had come downstairs, having heard voices in the living room.

"Unky Steve, Aunty Cath, what are you doing here?", the little girl was only around six years old but she was a smart six year old and all three adults knew they couldn't put one over here.. Steve sighed sadly and pulled away from Mary to take the hand of his niece and pulled her onto his lap.. "Why are you and Momma crying?" He leant into her and kissed her temple and cuddled her as Mary placed her hand on her daughters back, "Well, your Momma and I got some sad news… Our Momma, your Grandmomma.. Well sweetheart, something happened to her and she died".

"Like Muggles Momma?", she turned to face her mother, still in her Uncles arms.. Muggles was her kitten and she had been accidentally run over, and Mary had to explain to her what happened and why Muggles wouldn't be able to play with her anymore, "Yeah sweetie, like Muggles.. Grandma is in heaven like Grandpa and Muggles". She nodded her head as she buried herself in her uncle.. She might not have seen her grandmother much in her life, but she still loved her and Mary had always shown her the photos that Deb had given her so she knew who she was..

Knowing that Steve and Mary still had a lot to talk about, Catherine stood up and held out her hand, "How about while your Mom and Uncle talk for a moment, you get dressed and then we can go buy some breakfast for us all, I dunno about you but I am starved", She looked to Mary for approval and smiled softly when she got a nod, "You can take my car, it has her car seat in it, keys are on the kitchen bench, and behave yourself for Aunt Catherine".

Though she knew Steve and Catherine had broken up, she had always liked her and respected her, and could even to a point understand why she had left to pursue her own life, but she did hope that Catherine being here now meant new beginnings for them both. Her big brother deserved to be happy, even if neither of them were happy right in this moment.

**Author's Notes. **

I am so grateful that I have so many people that love reading my stories. When I set out to write them, I don't usually have a bigger picture in mind, other then having the main two characters be happy and together but I am really proud of these next two chapters. I would like to eventually get Mary to move back to Hawaii with Joan in one of my fictions, maybe this could be the event that brings her back home for good, wanting to stay close to the only biological family she has left. I am really proud of this chapter, and I do hope that it was the right way to tell Joan as well, she would be about six I think now in the show, so I know from experience with my seven year old niece, they know a lot more then people give them credit for, so I think especially since Mary had already explained death to her, that she can understand what it means when Uncle Steve told her grandma died.


	8. Chapter 8

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 8 Catherine and Joan's POV**

On the way to get breakfast, Joan was quiet, She was much like her Uncle Steve in that way, it was like their way of processing information. Keeping an eye on her as she drove, she put on some music, deciding to let her process it and then she could talk to her about it when she was ready, much like how she did with Steve.. Both of them, even down to the little crinkle in between her eyes when she was thinking was Steve.. Joan McGarrett might not have been Mary and Steve's biological family, but she was most certainly a McGarrett all over.

It briefly crossed her mind to think about how Mary and Steve were doing, and when she was nearly there at the cafe she and Steve had seen on her way to Mary's home, her phone rang and it was Danny.. "Hey Danny, what's going on?", she answered the call and then put it on speaker so she didn't have to hold her phone while she was driving, "By the way, you are on speaker, I've got Joanie in the car with me". She mentioned that just in case Danny mentioned anything in detail about Steve's mother or another case she might need to help with.

"Hey there Joanie, I miss you.. You need to come visit with Uncle Danno soon, Grace and Charlie miss you". Joan smiled a little brighter, cuddling her stuffed seal to her closer, the seal that Catherine had given her on one of her visits to L.A to remind Joan of her Uncle. "Hi Uncle Danny, We will, I miss you guys too". Joan did hope that she would be able to visit with her Hawaii family soon, especially now hearing about her Grandmother dying, it would be nice to see them all. She talked to her school friends about her Hawaii family which included all her Uncle's work friends and they all enjoyed hearing about them.

Looking at Joan in the review mirror, she noticed she was now looking out the window and cuddling her seal again, "So, Cath, you and Steve in Los Angeles then?", he asked, curiously. He knew that Steve would want to tell his sister and niece in person about Doris, and he also knew how hard it would have been to be the one to tell her so he was really proud of him for doing the right thing and letting her know in person. It was the right thing to do.. "That we are, only for another few hours or so, then we gotta get back to Washington, Steve's got a debriefing tomorrow, Steve wanted to tell Mary and Joan in person what happened".

Pulling in to the car park, she turned the ignition off and pulled off her seatbelt but remained in her seat, taking the phone off speaker and putting it to her ear, "I can understand that, How is our boy doing anyway?", he was worried about Steve.. He had seen how Joe's death had pulled him nearly all the way under and he was not afraid to admit he was scared his boy was gonna sink this time instead of swimming. Catherine sighed softly, "Doing the best he can, hanging in there so far.. He is talking to Mary now while Miss Joanie and I go grab us all some much needed breakfast".

Sitting at his kitchen table, it was still early in Honolulu, around six thirty in the morning and he had a busy morning ahead of him, making sure Charlie got up and dressed for school, his breakfast and lunch done, and he didn't want to hold up Catherine if she was getting breakfast. "Okay hun, I don't want to hold you two up, so I'll let you go.. Let me know if Steve or you, or even Mary needs me for anything, doesn't matter what time of day it is, if you think I'll be asleep, just call me okay". Smiling softly, gazing back and noticing Joan already out of her buckles but still seated in the seat, "We will Danny, you are a great friend to him, never forget that.. I'll keep in touch". With that, they said their goodbyes and hung up their respective phones.

Turning around, she smiled at Joan, "Okay, why don't we go get some food, maybe some coffee's for the grown ups, some hot chocolate for you and then head back home. I'm sure your Mom and Uncle Steve are starving and in need of a good cup of coffee".

**Author's Notes **

Thank you all once again for the wonderful comments and support. It means so much that you all enjoy and love my stories, it makes me feel like I am doing something right with these characters. I am really proud of the emotion and the rawness of this one, so it does help to know others love it as much as I do.

**SteveMcGarrettLover**

I think you are my number one supporter and fan here and I appreciate it sooo much. It really makes it so much easier to continue writing when you have someone who is willing to read it. I have left it at a place where Joan and Catherine haven't talked much, but I think she might have a talk to her when they get to Washington, maybe they all notice she isn't her usual bubbly bright self and Catherine talks to her.

**Pislynn**

Thank you so much for reading, I am glad you are enjoying it. It is sad, but it was a sad episode and before they get onto anything romantic wise, this all needs to be addressed so they can move on.

**Navymcroll**

Thank you so much for reading and taking your time to write a review. I will admit that I also cried when I was writing it so that is when I knew I had something good with that chapter. I wished they would have shown that too or at least the funeral, would have been full circle then, the first episode starts with John's death and Mary not being there so would have been nice for her to have been at her mother's. Hopefully she was off screen. I do like that idea, that Catherine and Mary get along and Catherine still talked and visited with Mary and Joan.. I love the idea that Catherine could be close to them both and Mary still sees them as being endgame.


	9. Chapter 9

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 9 Mary and Steve's POV**

Watching her daughter go off with Catherine, she had to smile a little.. Even though Steve and Catherine hadn't been together for a while, she had to admit, she still liked Catherine a lot. She was the only girlfriend of Steve's she had ever been introduced to and they had developed a sisterly kind of bond.. Mary knew that her Aunt Deb had asked Catherine to be the one to hold Steve and Mary together and make sure they didn't lose touch again and it was nice to see Catherine taking on that role, a sisterly kind of role where took an interest in what Mary and Joan did.

Even after Steve and Catherine broke up, she still came to Los Angeles whenever she could to spend time with Mary and Joan, and it was nice.. It was nice to have another friend to count on, and secretly she was always hoping that her brother and Catherine got back together. She couldn't see her brother with anyone other then Catherine.. She knew what had happened, Catherine explained it all as much as she could, and it was really emotional for them both, tears and hugs as she explained it.

So to see her daughter going off with ease at hopefully her sister in law one day, it eased her pain just very slightly. "It always brings a smile to my face to see Catherine with a child, she will make an amazing mother one day", Steve smiled softly and looked back at his sister, part of him wanted to hope that it would be their child one day, not just hers with someone else, she was the great love of his life and the one that got away, several times, and now it was time to bring her home with him.. He wanted her to come home to Hawaii, to settle down and put down roots like he had. "Joanie loves her.. I don't know if Cath told you.. She always sends her gifts and comes to visit whenever she can, it's not a lot, but she tries".

He sighed softly, nodding his head, smiling a little.. "She might have mentioned it to me when she came out to help avenge's Joe's death last year". He liked that his sister still kept in touch with Catherine.. Steve was one of those guys to be private when he was dating and he had only introduced one girlfriend to his family, and that was Catherine.. He had been on leave before his father died and she had come to Hawaii as she had leave the same time, her parents were in Australia on a vacation at the time, so he took her home and introduced her to his father.. Then it was Mary and Joanie, then his Mom and finally his Aunt Deb.

Rubbing her face with the palms of her hands, she looked back over at her brother.. "What happened Steve?", she wasn't sure how much her brother could tell her, it was the CIA after all and they were known for their secrets, even going as far to deny that someone was an active agent or even was an agent. "I got intel that Mom had gone rouge, Couldn't take any of the team with me, but I went to Mexico to check it out.. Was there eight weeks gathering intel.. It did look like they were right about her.". He shook his head, looking back at her, his hand on hers, squeezing a little. "They were wrong though, She stayed on target the whole time.. She was killed by the head of a new drug cartel out of Sinaloa Mexico, her name was Carmen Lucia Perez.. Don't worry, Junior had my back and killed her".

What he couldn't say was he felt responsible for her death. He thought he had been doing the right thing in pulling her out of there, but it turned out, she had stayed on target and did her job, right till the end.. He couldn't tell his sister that though, that if he did just one thing differently, maybe she would still be alive.. It was the burden he wore, It was the same with Freddie's death, his fathers and even Joe White's, why should he feel any different about his mother's death? "I'm sorry I couldn't save her Sis, I know that you were wanting to spend more time with her, hoping she would come home one day". His gaze went to the ground and after a moment he looked up at her again.. "She did open an account for all three of us.. She had only had a chance though to put money in Joanie's account.. Half a million U.S".

The look on Mary's face, her eyes went wide and she was stunned.. Half a million.. Aunt Deb did a similar thing, put money into accounts for the three of them before she had finally passed away from her brain tumour, but this.. The ears began rolling down her eyes, it showed she cared, however why couldn't she see, that they didn't want the money, they just wanted her.. "Wow, that.. that's huge Steve.. I wish she knew all we needed was her though, no amount of money can take the pain away from just wishing she was here still". He pulled her close and hugged her to him, "I know.. I said the same thing to Cath last night, was that all we needed was her with us".

Pulling away, she wiped her eyes and took a breath, "So what happens now?, We need to organise a funeral for her.. She might not have been a mother to us but we are her only children." He nodded and let his hand run through his hair, his brow crinkling as it did when he was deep in thought.. "We will.. Her body is in Washington, once they release it, Catherine and I and we were hoping you and Joan will accompany her back home where we will have a funeral for her and she will be buried with Dad". She wasn't there for her father's funeral, but hopefully this would help lesson the guilt she still felt over that by being at her mother's. "We'll be there.. Does that mean you want us to fly back to Washington with you?" Nodding his head in confirmation, he pulled her close, her head resting on his shoulder. "I think that would be nice for us all to be there to bring her home what do you say kid?"

Nodding her head, smiling a little as Catherine and Joanie walked into the house with some lovely smelling breakfast treats and coffee, "Let's do it big brother".

**Author's Notes **

Thank you all once again for the wonderful comments and support. It means so much that you all enjoy and love my stories, it makes me feel like I am doing something right with these characters. I am really proud of the emotion and the rawness of this one, so it does help to know others love it as much as I do.


	10. Chapter 10

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 10 Steve's POV**

Back in Washington that evening, Steve made sure that Mary and Joan were able to get the room next to his and Catherine's, it had been a long day and a long flight back and all Steve wanted to do was jump in a hot shower and relax himself, and he couldn't help thinking that it would be nice to have Catherine in there with him. With Catherine, there as never any need to put on any false pretence, she knew exactly who he was and why he did what he did and what made him tick.. She knew the good parts of him and the bad parts of him.. and she still loved him..

Having gotten in around eight that evening and by the time they got through security, it was after eight thirty, and they all ended up having a quick dinner of fish and chips when they got back to the hotel. Despite the sad and tragic event that brought them back together, he did enjoy spending time with his sister and niece and he knew that he needed to make more of an effort to be around for them, especially now that they were each other's only biological family left.

He hugged them both tight before they headed off to their own room for much needed sleep, Joanie practically asleep in her mother's arms and sighed softly, rubbing his hands over his tired face when the door was closed and he heard Mary's door open and close softly. Catherine's arms were a welcome feeling as she stood next to him, snaking her arms around his waist. "Why don't we have a shower, and then we get some sleep.. I don't know about you, but I'm beat, it's been an exhausting day".

He nodded his head, and smiled a little at her, his brow wrinkling when he realised she mentioned 'we'.. "We… as in", he pointed to her and then himself as he spoke, "You and me.. together". Leaning in to him, she pressed her lips to his and nodded, "I'm glad you aren't too tired to make that connection there Sailor, yeah, I mean together.. Come on". She smiled and pulled away slightly, tugging on his arm to pull him to the shower, all the while, he was trying to keep his mind from going out of control with the thoughts he was having, yet the same time, knowing he had been waiting for this moment for a long time.

Standing in the shower, both of them naked and wet, raw with emotion, foreheads resting against each other's as they took in the heat of the water, the shower head giving them a nice flow of water splashing down on their aching muscles, and he couldn't help but move a little closer, his arms sliding down her sides, relearning every single curve, fingers trailing down her hip bones, her own hands trailing over his chest as she remembered how soft his skin was, her fingers remembering the exact places where it was a bit more rough and bumpy from scars.

Together that night, two people were slowly putting their broken hearts back together. It was always easy for the two of them to wind up in such an intimate place so soon after finding their way back into each other's hearts and lives. No matter how much time had passed, their love would never fade and Steve didn't want to be lonely anymore.. but he also didn't want to be with anyone that he didn't love and that is why he wouldn't let his well meaning best friend ever talk him into getting back onto the dating scene.. All he needed was right here with him..

After spending time making out and washing each other in the shower, they finally got out of the shower, dried off and got dressed, and got into bed together, legs and arms intertwining as they fell asleep, Catherine falling first and though he thought she was already in a deep sleep, he didn't see the smile on her face when he whispered those three words to her before his own eyes dropped to a close and he fell into his own slumber.

**Author's Notes. **

I'm sorry for the few days without an update, it has been crazy busy around here, I always find as soon as I sit down to write, I can write a huge novel size piece and need to reign myself in a bit. Thank you for all the support, I love that you are all invested in this story. It isn't just going to be a love story between Cath and Steve, it is also going to be a coming home kind of story, Cath comes back to Hawaii of course, but Mary and Joan will find themselves back on the island permanently, might even get other members of five o back, like Chin, Kono, Sara, Abby.. I didn't like that they broke Adam and Kono up even if there was no way they could justify it when Adam was coming back full time to the show, so in my version, I'd like to keep Kono and Adam very much together.. This is going to be something that is going to most likely pan out to be a long time thing, but I hope you all stick with me as long as this story stays alive.

**SteveMcGarrettLover**

Thank you so much, It is always nice to see you review every single one of my chapters, it is very much appreciated as well. I don't always like how Danny is always pushing him to get out there and date, but I do love the dynamic of the their friendship so I overlook that side of Danny a bit. We shall see how we go there, I do want to introduce more characters in the story, so Grace and Charlie will be there as well. Thank you as well for the pick up, I don't have a beta and I do always re-read stuff before I post, but sometimes things do get missed so I didn't notice that till you mentioned it.. I will go back and fix it up.

**St**

Thank you so much, I really appreciate your comments, It means so much to me to know my writing is appreciated and loved. I was the same, I wished Mary and Joanie had been involved in it, even a little bit in the following episode after Doris's death. Mary's relationship with her mother was just as complicated as her brother's was. I hope you enjoy the next couple of chapters.


	11. Chapter 11

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 11 Mary and Joan**

It was an easy call to make and a hard one at the same time.. Telling Steve that she would be there with him as they took their mother's body back to Hawaii, it wasn't something she was ever prepared for, or would ever want to do.. As complicated as her relationship with her mother was and more complex with her feelings towards her mother, she loved her, and it was painful to learn that her mother had been killed, and even more painful to find out that her brother had to witness it. She knew he witnessed his friend's death, Freddie, and he heard their father being killed over the phone, witnessed Joe's death and now was there for their mother's..

Both of them would be forever affected by what happened to them as children, Steve was fifteen at the time and Mary was ten.. To lose your mother in what they thought was a car accident and then their father sending them off to the mainland without a real explanation as to why, they both felt abandonment issues and it was hard to trust any one else after that. It would take Steve many years and it wasn't till he met Catherine that he began to trust and Mary, she still hadn't found that one, the man that she could let completely in.

Organising time off work and informing Joan's school was the easy part, she knew that they would all be understanding when it involved the death of a parent and in thinking it over, she knew she really needed to be with Steve, they needed to be a family, not separated like they usually were, and she was glad that Catherine was there with them as well. She was the one woman that made sense to both of them, the one woman they could both trust, and though Catherine might have made mistakes in the past, she was making up for them now.

Once they were in their own hotel room, she put changed Joan into her pyjamas and tucked her in. Apart from when Steve told her this morning, she hadn't really allowed herself to cry.. She hadn't allowed herself to cry for her father when she heard of his passing because she knew once she started, she wouldn't be able to stop. As she sat down in her bed with a glass of wine and her laptop to watch some Netflix before she headed to bed, she happened to glance over at her daughter and that was her first mistake that evening.

There was something about the innocence of seeing her six year old daughter sleeping soundly with her cuddly Seal with her that just broke her.. She couldn't imagine ever doing that to Joan, abandoning her.. The adoption was closed, the birth parents didn't want to know about the child, all she knew was the mother was a sixteen year old girl and she had chosen to give her baby to a mother that would take care of the child.. She understood why a sixteen year old might not feel ready to have a child, but she still couldn't imagine abandoning Joanie the way her mother had abandoned her, her brother and father.

Before she knew it, her tears were rolling down her face and she was sobbing, her shoulders shaking. Despite it all, she missed her mother already.. The woman that had given up her right of being called a mother and here Mary was sobbing into her hands to try to muffle the sound of her cries. Still, even in her valiant effort to remain quiet, a little body managed to climb into her lap and bury her head into her Momma's chest, her small hands patting her shoulder, "Momma?", she pulled away after a moment, looking into her mother's eyes feeling worried, knowing her mother rarely cried like that.

Wiping her tears away and chuckling when Joan reached over and grabbed her a tissue, she blew her nose and nodded, "I'm just a little sad baby.. I wanted Grandma to be apart of our lives more, so Momma's just a bit sad, and I'm sad for Uncle Steve too.." Joan leaned in and kissed her mother's cheek, her own tears forming.. She had started to get to know her Grandma and it had been exciting knowing she had a Grandmother like all of her other friends, she knew her Grandfather was in heaven as was her Great grandpa Steven and her Great Aunt Deb, but it was still hard for her as well. "You and Uncle Steve aren't gonna die are you Momma?"

Holding her daughter's face in her hands, she kissed her nose, "I'll be honest sweetheart, dying is a part of life.. and one day, hopefully a very long time away from now, we will, but we don't need to worry about that right now." Joan was smart though and she knew what kind of job her Uncle had, and even at six, she knew the dangers of being in law enforcement.. "What about Uncle Steve? He has a job like Grandma". Mary sighed softly, nodding her head.. "I worry about Uncle Steve too, and Uncle Danno, and the rest of our five-o family, but we gotta trust they know how to do their jobs and how to keep themselves safe.. Plus your Uncle managed to get through being a SEAL in the Navy, being a cop should be a piece of cake for him.. He will be fine baby, now let's get some sleep, Aunt Catherine was going to take us on a tour of Washington while Uncle Steve is doing his thing".

**Author's Notes. **

I'm sorry for the few days without an update, it has been crazy busy around here, I always find as soon as I sit down to write, I can write a huge novel size piece and need to reign myself in a bit. Thank you for all the support, I love that you are all invested in this story. It isn't just going to be a love story between Cath and Steve, it is also going to be a coming home kind of story, Cath comes back to Hawaii of course, but Mary and Joan will find themselves back on the island permanently, might even get other members of five o back, like Chin, Kono, Sara, Abby.. I didn't like that they broke Adam and Kono up even if there was no way they could justify it when Adam was coming back full time to the show, so in my version, I'd like to keep Kono and Adam very much together.. This is going to be something that is going to most likely pan out to be a long time thing, but I hope you all stick with me as long as this story stays alive.


	12. Chapter 12

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 12**

Waking up the next day, Steve knew that it was going to be a long day. The debrief was not going to be terribly long at all, however it was something that needed to be done. He knew that the CIA wasn't the warmest nicest place to be and that they had a way of making things hard for other law enforcement agencies, even going as far as trying to have him killed because he was poking around into the mess the CIA had made for themselves years ago. He hated that his mother worked for them and hated that Catherine worked for them as well.

He knew that in the life they had chosen, wether it be in the Navy or even in law enforcement, that there was always the risk of losing your life. That was what fighting for your country and protecting your community was all about, and yet at the same time, after losing his mother for so many years to the CIA, and now her only ending her CIA career in a body bag, he couldn't risk losing Catherine that way.. His mother was at fault for her leaving her husband and children when she faked her death, at the same time, the CIA had done so much damage to his family that he couldn't handle even the thought of seeing Catherine in a body bag because of a CIA operation gone wrong.

Having her in his arms the night before, it felt real, it felt tangible and it felt like something he needed to hang onto. The love he felt for Catherine was not like anything else he ever had felt before and now that he had a taste of being back in her arms, having her love around him, he couldn't think of being with anyone else. He knew Danny always meant well when he tried to set him up on dates but he didn't want to be set up on dates with someone that didn't know his routine and didn't know that he still had nightmares and woke up with night sweats.

Sure, he was lonely at times, there was no doubt about that. As a man, he had needs and wants as did every man.. It didn't mean that he wanted a one night stand or a short term fling though. He made that mistake with Greer many years ago, and he ever since he met Catherine, even when they had their moments when they weren't together, he never really had any kind of moments with anyone else. It always felt a bit of betrayal if he did and that is why it even took him as long as he did to date Lynn, and that became too much for him when she had wanted a more serious commitment and he knew he couldn't give that to her.

"You sure you are gonna be able to handle Mary and Joan all by yourself today?", he asked her with a slight smirk on his face. He knew the two of them were sometimes a handful, Mary hadn't really changed much at all in personality though she was a lot more responsible than when he first came back to the island. He had his doubts at first when she came to the island to introduce his new baby niece to him and even thought about talking to her to take the baby back, and now he couldn't imagine life without Joanie in their lives. Mary had changed for the better, but she was still just as hyper as her six year old daughter was at times.

Smiling, Catherine leaned in, both hands on either side of his cheeks and nodded as she kissed him gently. "I promise I'll be fine, Mary and Joan are amazing and I love spending time with them both, I just wish you would reconsider me being there with you, I can always set Mary and Joan up with a friend who can show them around". Kissing her back, he smiled softly, "I know you want to be there with me, and I love that, we've both been through many briefings and debriefings in our lives, you know it's just a formality. I think they just really want to hear my version of what went down you know". She nodded, understanding exactly what he meant. Even if they already knew what happened, they still wanted to know directly from the source.

"Good luck, though I'm sure you won't need any, and as soon as it's all over, we can all meet up for lunch". She knew Steve would be fine, but after all he had been through this year alone, she was worried for him. He had lost so much and this couldn't be easy, dealing with the aftermath of his mother's death. As much as Steve had told her not to get involved with this, she did want to ensure that there would be no issues with Doris's body being released to Steve and so he had a word with the Director of the CIA. She had also handed in her resignation letter, that effective immediately she would no longer be working for the Central Intelligence Agency.

He nodded his head, watching in the mirror as she straightened his tie, "Sounds good to me, and then I'm hoping that tomorrow we can take Mom home where she has always belonged". The door to their room had been left often and at hearing that, Mary, whom had just walked in with Joan on her hip nodded, "Amen to that big brother".

**Author's Notes**

Again, thank you all so much. It makes me so happy to hear that this story is being well received. I appreciate all the love and support on here, it encourages me to keep going and to keep writing. I do apologise for the delay, I am away on holidays with my family this week and I am writing this when I get a moment or two spare so these two chapters, 12 and 13 have been written over a few days.

**Guest: **

Thank you so much, I really am thrilled you have enjoyed this story so much. Catherine and also Mary, and Joan are exactly what he needs. I love the Ohana he has surrounding him in the show, but at it's core, he needs Cath back and I'd love to see Mary and Joan back on the island as well which is why I am adding them back in.

**SteveMcGarrettLover: **

It makes me really happy to know the rawness and emotion of the story is being felt. I really enjoy that you love reading each chapter. Chapter 14 will be Mary, Joan and Catherine doing something while waiting for Steve. I really honestly think Mary still loves her mother, she might have had a complicated relationship with complicated emotions there, and conflicting emotions but she is her mother and at the end of the day, you will always love your mother. I don't know if Catherine will give them a tour of the CIA but one of the Memorials or somewhere where Catherine loved to go, a place to share with Mary and Joan.

**SkyesMom: **

Thank you so much for your encouragement. I always enjoy writing for Steve and Cath, they are my OTP and two people I adore watching, reading and writing for. I am glad you have enjoyed reading my work.


	13. Chapter 13

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 13 Debrief **

"I believe you were told that you were not to have any support with you". The Director of the CIA sat at his desk, fingers interlaced with each other while he looked sharply at Lieutenant Commander Steve McGarrett, "I also understand that you had with you on that mission three former SEALS, one of whom you work with now in the governor's five-o taskforce out of Hawaii". Steve, sitting on the other side of the desk sat at attention, his cover off and by his side, nodded his head. He couldn't argue with any of that, though he had been explicit in his instructions for his team to not send support unless he communicated with them.

"Director, that is all true.. I'm not going to lie at all and tell you anything other then the truth. I was told not to take anyone with me, that this was a mission I had to agree to being on my own for.. I also was very explicit in detail about informing my team not to provide help to me". He left out the part when he also told his team not to provide assistance unless he communicated to them that he needed it. They didn't need to know that did they, h was not in the Navy, he wasn't under their control or orders to divulge everything.

"S.O Reigns as a Navy SEAL himself is a teams man and our mantra has always been to never leave a man behind and so while I ordered him to stay away, I commend him for coming to my aid even though I didn't ask for it. I wouldn't have ever gotten the job done if I were on my own, you sent me on a suicide mission. You wanted to get rid of my mother and then not to have the pesky son looking into her any more of her cases or missions with the CIA. This was your chance to get rid of us both". He knew that the Director wouldn't be happy at knowing that Steve McGarrett was still alive.

Lucky for me, my boy Junior, he is a good shot and did what you ordered..You wanted Carmen Lucia Perez dead, well Congratulations, we did your job for you.. My mother was killed for your cause. I nearly died for your cause.. all because you doubted my mother's motives.. I hope you think the price was worth the cost because the cost was my mother's life, not only have I lost my mother, but my sister lost her mother and my niece lost her grandmother.. So I hope it is all worth it". He knew that they wouldn't come after him, after all, if it wasn't for him and his fellow Navy buddies, Perez would still be alive and still causing issues for the CIA and the DEA.

He knew he was being bold, but he knew that he was right as well. He wasn't just going to sit around and take this one on the chin. His mother was killed, and yes, she might have done her job right, but the CIA didn't care about their Agents lives or the lives of their families at all, they were just a number, an asset to them, and when their 'asset' has passed their use by date, they get rid of them. There was also the times when the agents turned against their agency and county like Greer did as well. It was why he would never become one of them, with five-o, he felt like more than a number, and he treated his team like a family. Even HPD, their backup was like a family to them as well.

Smirking as he watched the Director falter a little, "You make a fair point Commander McGarrett, and I deeply regret the loss of Doris McGarrett, she was a good agent, but I won't say I am not happy that because of you and your team, we have done a lot of damage to the cartel down there in Mexico, they will be hurting as well if it helps you". It really didn't help him at all, yes the woman that killed his mother was dead and it did mean that there was a lot of drugs out there that wouldn't be hitting the streets now, and yet he wasn't able think that it helped anything. The way they spoke, it was exactly like a cold blooded agency that just didn't care for it's people.

"No, it doesn't really help at all, what would help is when my girlfriend, sister and niece can get my mother back to O'ahu and we can say goodbye to our mother and grandmother and not have to worry about looking over our shoulders anymore in case the CIA decides to come around and haunt our family some more.. The CIA took away a wife, and a mother, and for that, there is no consolation and nothing that can ever make that right or help". His stance was one of rigidness, but his rank and his authority was all over his face. "I've told you all I can about what went down, now to return the favour, please let me know when you are finished doing the autopsy on my mother so we can take her home where she belongs".

Sighing, he had heard rumours the Commander wasn't an easy man to deal with and that was certainly the truth now as well. "Of course.. We have finished the autopsy and we will have her ready for transportation by 0900 tomorrow morning at Andrews, you and your family have been provided free travel on that flight". There was not much more to say or ask. This man had a tendency to do whatever he could to get into his mother's business when she was in the CIA and he had been nearly killed for that on more than one occasion. The current Governor and Mayor of Hawaii had spoken highly of Commander Steve McGarrett and his five-o task force and he was under strict instructions not to harm him or his family. Steve was good for the island and the island was good for him, so he was told.

"Well, if that is all, I will be on my way", Steve stood up and held out his hand to shake the Directors hand as a show of good gesture. "I trust that this will be the last we ever hear from the CIA". The Director shook his hand and nodded, "Of course Commander McGarrett, and again, I am sorry for your loss". With that, Steve nodded and walked out, eager to get back to Mary, Joan and Catherine. It had been a long morning and he just wanted to be close to the people he loved.

**Author's Notes**

Again, thank you all so much. It makes me so happy to hear that this story is being well received. I appreciate all the love and support on here, it encourages me to keep going and to keep writing. I do apologise for the delay, I am away on holidays with my family this week and I am writing this when I get a moment or two spare so these two chapters, 12 and 13 have been written over a few days. I do hope that his conversation with the Director of the CIA was good enough. I do feel if anyone is going to give the Director of an agency a dressing down, it would be Steve.


	14. Chapter 14

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 14 **

Joanie McGarrett was in her element, she had two of her three favourite people with her, her mother Mary McGarrett was holding onto her left hand and on her right, holding her right hand was her Aunt Catherine only person missing from the equation was her Uncle Steve McGarrett, however both her mother and her uncle had told her the reason why her uncle couldn't be with them.. For Joanie she understood why her Uncle needed to miss out, it was all for her Nanna Doris.

Her Grandmother and her Mother had talked a few times, Nanna Doris had even visited a a couple of times as well. Every time she visited, she made sure she had a present for Joan as well. For her young age, she could sense some tension whenever her name was brought up and even some pain in her Momma's eyes, however her mother never let it interfere with her mother wanting to see her granddaughter.

Her grandfather was already gone and her mother had explained it to her that she couldn't bear the thought of her own mother not seeing her granddaughter when and if she wanted to. For Mary, she knew that Steve might not have understood fully the reason why Mary had allowed her mother back into his sister and niece's lives, but for Mary, she was her mother and she was a grandmother to her own daughter. She couldn't visit John's grave in Hawaii when she visited knowing she wasn't prepared to grant access to her mother.

"Okay munchkin, we can go see the National Zoo, the Natural History Museum, the Air and Space Museum, Discovery theatre, the Washington Monument, what do you think?", Mary asked her daughter smiling softly as they waited for a taxi to take them to their destination. "Well, the zoo is probably like most Zoo's, how about the Air and Space Museum, and maybe when Uncle Steve is finished, he can take us to see the Washington Monument". She answered in perfect clarity about what she wanted to do and see.

For Mary, it was hard to be upbeat when her mother had just died, but she knew that making memories with her daughter and hopefully one day her sister in law was what matter. Her mother might be gone, but she was always going to be in their hearts, and Mary didn't really want to look back on these memories and see herself upset and close to tears all day so she took a breath and nodded her head.. "I think that is a great idea munchkin, I think Uncle Steve will be happy you decided to wait for him to see the Washington Monument.

Cath chimed in with a smile and a squeeze of Joanie's hand, "I also think your Uncle will be thrilled you decided to go see the Air and Space Museum, you know how your Uncle loves aviation and looking at the stars way out in space as well". Joan smiled with a huge grin that both Catherine and Mary took as pride in doing something that her Uncle would approve of as well. "So what are we waiting for, let's go", Joan declared in a loud voice filled with excitement.

Luck had it, just at that moment, a taxi stopped right in front of them, "Well if that is not a sign to get going, I don't know what is", Mary chuckled softly as she opened the back door to let her daughter in, Catherine getting into the front passenger seat with the driver, watching as Joan scooted along the seat to let Mary in next to her. "Air and Space museum please", Catherine spoke to the driver, letting him know their destination for the morning, smiling upon the big grin still sporting Joan's face.

It was a hard decision, leaving Steve to deal with the fallout of what happened, but she knew he could handle himself, and though she had been in the CIA for some time now, her loyalty would always be to Steve. It was why she was getting herself out. It wasn't quite like she had expected it to be and while she had been forced to become part of the CIA so they would stop hunting down five-o, she knew that she couldn't do it any longer. She had lied to Steve when she had said she was happy doing what she was doing when they rescued his mother from the CIA black site where they were holding Wo Fat's father.

She had said that as a way of helping him to move on with Lyn, however it was clear to her now that wasn't the case and that ever since he lost Joe White, they had kept in contact more regularly, even the close call with Grace and her car accident, she had dropped everything to be there for Steve, Danny and his family. Hawaii might not have been where she was born and raised, however it was where she wanted to put down roots and settle down. She never wanted to leave Steve after Kono's wedding and ever since she learnt that Steve had been about to propose, all she could think about was going back to Hawaii on a more permanent basis.

The trip took about fifteen minutes from their hotel room and once there, Catherine paid the taxi driver and the three of them got out to have a few hours in the Air and Space Museum before meeting Steve for some lunch, Joan taking both of their hands once more as soon as the three of them were out of the cab.

**Author Notes: **

Thank you all so much for all of your patience. I haven't really written anything for this since late November so I appreciate you all sticking by and waiting for the next chapters to come. I hope this is a lovely belated Christmas gift to you all. I wasn't aware where I began this journey on this story that it would turn out the way it has but I am really enjoying writing it and really enjoying going through this journey as well. Getting back home after our holidays, December just became quite busy but finally I have had a bit of downtime to get these next ones done.

**SteveMcGarrettLover**

Again, thank you for all of your support, advise and suggestions. I do love putting in as many suggestions as I can when I have someone mention something specifically to write about. I hope you really enjoy these next chapters. I have enjoyed writing them. I am glad you liked the last two chapters before this one. I do think that is a really sweet gesture, in my eyes Joe White was the first McRoll shipper, he is the one that told Steve to ask Catherine out. He could see they would be great together so I do think he might have done that, put it in his will that he was giving them the ranch. I may use it in this one or another one but I will use it somewhere along the lines.


	15. Chapter 15

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 15**

"Uncle Steve, Uncle Steve, we're over here Uncle Steve", came a little voice a few hundred feet in front of him. He smiled and waved back at the small figure standing up and jumping up and down as she waved at him. As much as he loved the videos and photos and face time calls he had with Joan and Mary, it never compared to being face to face in person with them. There was just an undeniable joy he got whenever he heard his name being called out as Uncle, first from Grace, she was the first one, then Joanie, Sammie, Will and now Charlie even calls him Uncle Steve.

He was skeptical at first when Mary first came back home to introduce him to the baby she had adopted, she had always had trouble with looking after even herself, he had to help her out of many situations when she was on the mainland and he was still the SEALS. Some of those times she didn't even know her big brother had helped her out but even though they weren't close back then, he would always look out for her.

She had really changed through the years and had proven him wrong. She was a wonderful mother to that little girl, and Joanie had him wrapped around her fingers like all nieces did to their Uncles. His desk at work, he wasn't a man to have many photos in and around his office, but he had a photo of Mary and Joan together, one of Catherine, one of his family when they were younger before his mother faked her death and then one of his grandparents.

That little girl had stolen his heart and there wasn't anything that he wouldn't do for her. He understood Mary had been living on the mainland longer than she had ever lived on the island of O'ahu, and she liked it in California, however he hoped that he would be able to get her to move out there. Hawaii was the best place on earth to live and there was nothing more then he wanted to see than his sister and niece living close by to him, as well as Catherine living with him.

"There's my girl", he smiled as she came running towards him as he drew closer and as soon as she was close enough, he lifted her in the air and tossed her up lightly before settling her on his hip and kissing her temple as she gave him a huge hug. "We missed you Uncle Steve", he smiled and chuckled lightly as he walked the rest of the way to where Catherine and Mary were sitting down at a table at an outside cafe.

He ruffled his niece's hair and put her down in her chair as he leaned in and kissed his sister on the cheek and then Catherine on the lips softly before sitting down next to Catherine. "I missed you guys too.. I heard you went somewhere real exciting this morning". As much as he could sense all Catherine wanted to do was ask him how he was and how it all went, she knew that it was a conversation that could wait till later, however as he spoke to his niece, he could feel her hand entwining into his and squeezing softly.

Smiling softly at her, he appreciated the gesture and squeezed back as he listened intently to his niece speak about their day at the Air and Space Museum. Catherine had been texting him photos and small videos throughout the morning so he had something to take his mind off the meeting that had occurred earlier in the day. "It was so cool Uncle Steve, I went in a simulator", as she said simulator, her voice went up in pitch as she became more excited, "Wow, that is awesome Joanie, give me a high five". He held out his hand and chuckled as she gave him a high five. "Aunt Cath has been sending me some photos of you having so much fun, I'll tell you right now.. I am so jealous".

Joan giggled as her Uncle said he was jealous of not going to the Air and Space museum, her mother putting her hand gently on her shoulder to calm over overly excitable daughter. "Now that Uncle Steve is here, I think it's time we looked at the menu and see what's good here for lunch, I dunno about you munchkin but Mommy is starving after our big morning". Joan smiled and nodded, "Me too..". She reached for a menu and handed it to her Uncle Steve for Steve and Cath to share, just as the waiter came over to take their order, "What do you think looks good Joanie?", he asked seriously, "I think the burgers and fries, and of course the chocolate shake". He chuckled, and nodded his head, "I think that is perfect, I think I'll order that as well, how about you Lieutenant?"

Catherine had been quiet this whole time, letting Steve and his niece catch up, as soon as she heard him speak to her, she smiled and chuckled, she had been thinking of the same thing as soon as she had seen the menu when they first sat down at the table, "Well Commander, I don't think you can go wrong with burgers and fries, though I might make mine a strawberry shake". Mary who was sitting next to Catherine's left hand side nodded as she put down the menu herself, "I'm convinced, burgers and fries, and a vanilla shake for me".

Steve nodded to the waiter and smiled, "Well, that's four burgers and fries, two chocolate shakes, one strawberry shake and one vanilla shake will do us please". The waiter nodded his head and smiled as he wrote down the order, "the child order of burgers and fries also comes with a free ice cream for desert, it won't be too long, your shakes will be out shortly". As he walked away, Steve leant over to Joan and whispered, "You gonna share some of your ice cream with me?", both of them glancing over at Mary and Catherine as though sharing their own little secret, "You got it Uncle Steve", she whispered back, smiling brightly as she leant over to hug him, barely noticing both Mary and Catherine with their phones out taking a photo of the two of them.

**Author Notes: **

Thank you all so much for all of your patience. I haven't really written anything for this since late November so I appreciate you all sticking by and waiting for the next chapters to come. I hope this is a lovely belated Christmas gift to you all. I wasn't aware where I began this journey on this story that it would turn out the way it has but I am really enjoying writing it and really enjoying going through this journey as well. Getting back home after our holidays, December just became quite busy but finally I have had a bit of downtime to get these next ones done.


	16. Chapter 16

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 16**

Once lunch was over, and they had eaten the ice cream that Joan got, they decided to walk to the Washington Monument. It wasn't too far away from the place where they stopped to have lunch and while Mary, Catherine and Steve walked, Joan got a ride on her Uncle's shoulders, his sister on one side of him and Catherine on the other side.

By the time they had lunch and Joanie had been to the bathroom before they left, it was nearly two pm and while Joan was looking a little tired after such a busy morning, she wasn't too tired to go see the Washington Monument. When Steve and Mary had asked her if she wanted to go back to the hotel, it was met with a loud no in protest to which Mary laughed and told Steve she was exactly like him, never wanting to miss out on anything.

Steve and Catherine had seen it many times before, both had visited Washington when on active duty and had been there before, a few times alone and a couple times together, but it was the first time they had seen it like this, as a family. He almost didn't dare use that word when it came to Catherine, mainly for fear of losing her again or having her leave like she had done before, but she was family.

He only had Mary left as his biological family, and he did count his five-o family his Ohana as well, and Catherine would always be a huge part of his life, so wether he felt comfortable or not saying it right now, she was family. Once they had paid to get in, Catherine took his free hand, the one not holding onto Joan's legs and rested her head on his shoulder, smiling softly when she felt Joan's fingers moving through and playing with her hair.

"Remember when we visited at sunset that one time, how beautiful it was", she moved her head slightly to look into Steve's eyes as they walked.. "I remember.. I remember how beautiful you looked as your hair moved in the wind, the way the sun's light as it set looked against your face, the look in your eyes as you revelled in the beauty of nature, the way you smiled at me when I held your hand, how you wore that white dress, the summery one with light purple flowers that was strapless and flowed down your body, swaying slightly in the breeze, the way that the whole world went away and it was just you and I".

Catherine nearly froze as he said those words, how detailed he was in that description, right down to what she was wearing. They had decided to go there as part of a date and so both were already dressed up, out of their uniforms and into comfortable and casual but still date like clothing. It had been so many years ago.. It was a week after their first date, the one where Steve had asked Cath to the Army-Navy gala at Westpoint. Both had to be in Washington, DC, ready to ship out on their respective ships and this was the last chance to be stateside together for a while.

"You still remember what I wore that night?", she was surprised.. It hadn't been anything fancy, Catherine wasn't a woman who wore dresses a lot, but when she did, she preferred simple rather than overdone. It was also the first night of many to come that they made love, it was filled with passion and care, the way he treated her that night, she had felt safe in his arms, and it was that moment, that whole evening in fact when she fell completely head over heels in love with him and now standing beside him now, with his sister on his left and his niece on his shoulders, she realised she had never fallen out of love with him.

"Of course I remember, I was speechless.. You. You took my breath away that night". He smiled, recalling that memory of when she opened the door to the hotel room she was staying in, "You always take my breath away Sailor", her words were whispered, soft and low, only for him to hear as she snuggled into his side, his arm wrapping around her waist as he walked. Coughing softly to get rid of the emotion in his voice, he spoke a bit louder to Joan, "So Joan, what do you think, do you think we should go right up the top of the monument?".

She smiled and bounced up and down on his shoulders carefully, nodding her head, "Please, we have to Uncle Steve, we just have to", Mary smiled and wiped away a few tears, she had heard part of Catherine and Steve's conversation as much as they tried to be quiet, her heart filling with hope for her big brother that he would finally be able to settle down with the love of his life piped up, "Yeah, Uncle Steve, we gotta, we just gotta". Steve laughed softly and chuckled, "Okay, I think you guys are gonna love it".

**Author Notes: **

Thank you all so much for all of your patience. I haven't really written anything for this since late November so I appreciate you all sticking by and waiting for the next chapters to come. I hope this is a lovely belated Christmas gift to you all. I wasn't aware where I began this journey on this story that it would turn out the way it has but I am really enjoying writing it and really enjoying going through this journey as well. Getting back home after our holidays, December just became quite busy but finally I have had a bit of downtime to get these next ones done.


	17. Chapter 17

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 17**

They stayed around the monument till nearly closing time, it was around four thirty when they decided to head back to the hotel. Steve had parked the car near the cafe where they had lunch, so they walked back to the car, a very tired Joan still on her Uncle's shoulder, half asleep as he put her into her car seat and did her belts up, then moving out of the way so that Mary could get in next to Joan on the other side and Catherine getting into the passenger seat next to Steve.

It had been a really busy day, and tomorrow was going to be even busier. They had to be at Andrews early, the flight time was for 0900 the next morning which meant they needed to be at Andrews by around 0800. Once they were back at the hotel, they had a light dinner in the hotel's dinning room, Steve letting them all know the plan for tomorrow, that they were fine to take Doris back to Hawaii in the morning.

Both Cath and Mary could sense he was a little nervous, wondering if the CIA would actually have Doris's body at Andrews so when they headed back to their rooms and Steve went into Mary and Joan's room to read Joan a story and say goodnight, Catherine called in a favour with one of her handlers, assuring that Doris's body would be there. She too was nervous, and a little worried that the Director might not hold onto his word so this was a little assurance that it would all go to plan.

After she hung up that call, she dialled Danny's cell number and smiled as he picked up and said hello to her. "How is our boy doing?", she heard him ask, smiling again at the tone in his voice. She could sense the worry in his tone of voice and also a bit of regret maybe it was that he couldn't be there to see for himself how Steve was doing. "He is doing the best he can at the moment, he is holding on, staying strong like a true SEAL. Danny, I want to let you know that by tomorrow evening, we will be back in Hawaii, flight is due to leave at 9:00am in the morning from Andrews".

She heard Danny sigh a little, and pick up a pen, "So you guys should land around 8:00pm or so.. Look, Cath, you guys just rest up, Lou, Junior and I can make the arrangements with the National memorial cemetery where John is buried and make sure they meet us there around 8:00pm tomorrow evening so they can transport Doris back to the funeral home to get her ready for burial".

As much as these two fought, she loved that the took such good care of each other, they were very much like brothers and she loved that Danny always looked out for Steve, "Thanks Danny, I know Steve wouldn't want to ask this much of you, but I appreciate it and I know he does as well". Cath then relayed the information that the funeral home needed to know and Danny wrote it all down, "Of course I'd do this for him Cath, he is family, I'd do anything for him". She smiled, tearing up a little, "I never did thank you you know..".

Putting the phone in his other hand, he was confused, "Thank me, for what Hon?', he was genuinely curious about what she had to say.. "I never thanked you for", her voice trembled softly and the tears fell down her cheeks, "for giving part of your liver to Steve.. You saved him Danny.. I don't know how to ever thank you for that". Putting down the pen, and sipping on his coffee, he smiled, getting a little emotional himself. "Best way you can thank me is by coming home where you belong Cath. We all miss having you here and I know Steve would be overjoyed at having you home".

She choked up at that and smiled through her tears, nodding her head.. "I'm working on that Danny, there is nothing that would make me happier than being home with him and with my family". They said their goodbyes and hung their respective phones up, Cath heading into the bathroom to have a shower before bed, her written resignation to the Director of the CIA already in her go bag, ready to give to him the next morning.

**Author Notes: **

Thank you all so much for all of your patience. I haven't really written anything for this since late November so I appreciate you all sticking by and waiting for the next chapters to come. I hope this is a lovely belated Christmas gift to you all. I wasn't aware where I began this journey on this story that it would turn out the way it has but I am really enjoying writing it and really enjoying going through this journey as well. Getting back home after our holidays, December just became quite busy but finally I have had a bit of downtime to get these next ones done.


	18. Chapter 18

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 18**

Steve had never really envisioned himself as a family man, even though that is the only thing he ever really wanted since the day he met Catherine. The first child he had ever had the privilege of spending a lot of time with was Grace Williams, the daughter of his partner. Now she was one of his nieces, just as much his niece as his sister's daughter as well. He had Gracie, Charlie, Sammi, Will, and Joanie in his life and having them all call him Uncle Steve, even the older ones still, it meant a lot to him.

Having read to his six year old niece, she was a real firecracker.. She might not be McGarrett in blood, but what she lacked in McGarrett blood, she gained in McGarrett personality. She was a McGarrett through and through. He could see so much of himself, and his sister in her.. He could even see the stubborn side of his mother and the caring protective side of his father in her as well. He adored her and loved being able to get time with her even if it was at a time like this.

"You still have the touch bro", Mary spoke up softly as he finished the story, Joan sound asleep on the bed, smiling as she remembered how Steve used to read to her of a night when they were younger, mostly when John was on a case and couldn't get home in time for bedtime story with Mary, Steve used to take over and read to her. He chuckled and stood up from the bed where he had been laying with Joan, careful not to move too suddenly, not wanting to wake her up now she was sleeping. "I guess I do Sis".

He smiled as Mary stood up and walked over to hug him, "Thanks for coming and getting us Steve, I know it wasn't easy, to come to Los Angeles and tell me the news, but it means so much to us both". He hugged back tight and nodded his head, "I know how hard it was telling you about Dad, I wasn't even home yet when I had to tell you that, so I knew if I could get to you, it was best to do it in person". Mary was the first to let go, "You should go get some sleep, we have a big day tomorrow".

Nodding his head, he smiled softly.. "You too, get some rest Sis". He blew her a kiss, putting the story book down on the bedside table and headed out to his own hotel room, where he had Catherine waiting for him. "She asleep?", Cath asked softly when he opened the door and walked in, the door closing on its own behind him. "Sound asleep.. She had a busy day with you guys". He walked past her and kissed her softly, "Let me shower and then I'm all yours Lieutenant".

Once his shower was over, and he was all dressed, he turned off the bathroom light and closed the door, climbing into bed next to Catherine, "I know you want to know how things went, but why don't we talk about that on the flight home tomorrow". Catherine smiled softly and nodded, "Yes Sir Commander". Leaving the lamp on, he smiled as he moved closer to her under the covers, leaning down and kissing her softly, his lips pressing gently against her own.

Looking up at him, she bit her lip and smiled, "Ohh I see how it is", he chuckled and played along, "You do now do you?", Catherine nodded her head, "I see what you would rather be doing and I gotta say, I agree whole heartedly with that Sailor". With that, she giggled softly as she reached around and turned out the light, knowing that wether they just made out for a while before they fell asleep or they went further and made love, he would always take care of her and she would always feel safe in his arms.

Mary meanwhile read for a little longer and then began to pack their bags for the morning. She would be going home to Hawaii, she didn't visit her brother in Hawaii nearly as much as she should, and it did make her feel like a bad sister at times even if Steve had told her time and time again he understood that it wasn't easy to take time off work and for Joan to take time off school, and the expenses of travelling as well.

It was why she was thinking about moving back to Hawaii on a more permanent basis. Sure she had a group of friends she talked to, a good job, and Joan had friends and was settled in school.. She knew that as much as Joan loved her friends and school, she had asked her Mom a few times as to why they couldn't move to Hawaii to be with all of her Uncles and Aunt's and cousins.

Looking at her daughter before she turned the lamp off, she smiled and kissed her temple, "Well munchkin, looks like you might get your wish of moving to Hawaii after all". Home was where the heart was and her family were all on the island. She might not know all of the five-o task force really well, but she knew they all had Steve's back and in turn they would also have Mary and Joan's as well.

**Author Notes: **

Thank you all so much for all of your patience. I haven't really written anything for this since late November so I appreciate you all sticking by and waiting for the next chapters to come. I hope this is a lovely belated Christmas gift to you all. I wasn't aware where I began this journey on this story that it would turn out the way it has but I am really enjoying writing it and really enjoying going through this journey as well. Getting back home after our holidays, December just became quite busy but finally I have had a bit of downtime to get these next ones done.


	19. Chapter 19

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 19**

It wasn't easy, getting a six year old up way before she usually gets up. They had to be at the Andrews Air Force base by 8:00am which meant they had to be up at around 6:30am so they had time to shower, make sure they packed all their belongings, grab something to eat and then head to Andrews. Joan had a shower the night before, so Mary didn't worry about giving her another in so early in the morning, she let her sleep in as long as she possibly could while she showered herself and then once she was ready, she woke her up and dressed her in her half sleepy state.

Knocking on Steve and Catherine's hotel room door, Catherine opened the door for them as Steve put his jacket on. Both of them watched in amusement when Joan went to wearily sit, half lay on the unmade and yawned rather loudly. "She isn't a morning person are you munchkin", Mary answered their amused looks as a way of explanation. "We are all ready, how about you guys?", she added, looking around the room to make sure they were all packed up and ready to go.

"We are ready to go, I thought we might have a little breakfast in the hotel dinning room before we get going, we still have time", Catherine was the first one to speak, It was now around 7:00am on the dot. "I'll go put our bags in the car so we don't have to have them lug them around to the dinning room and leave them unattended somewhere". Steve picked up their bags and smiled softly at his niece who was told by her mother to stand up, "I'll meet you guys down there", he kissed Catherine softly and then grabbed the keys to the rental and opened the door to head down to the garage.

"Okay Munchkin, let's go get some good seats in the dinning room and wait for your Uncle to come back to have something to eat.. You all ready Cath?", she spoke to Joan and then to Cath who nodded who had a quick look in the bathroom and then around the room before smiling. "Yup, all ready, let's go". She picked up her handbag and her phone, sliding it into her bag and walked out of the door that Mary had still open and once they were all out, it closed. "I'll go down to reception, hand in our card keys and then meet you guys in the dinning room".

Steve had moved the car out of the garage and out to the front parking lot and came back in through the reception area, stopping to wait for Catherine once he spotted her there. They walked back to the dinning room together, hand in hand and sat down to eat breakfast with Mary and Joan, chuckling as she raved about the pancakes and how good they were, Steve and Catherine both sipping on their coffee's and eating their shared pancakes as well.

Once breakfast was over, they all headed to the bathroom, and then out to the car. It became more somber as they got closer to Andrews, it was getting onto 8:00am and they were pulling the rental into the car space. Someone from the CIA was going to hand it back over the the rental car place later on that day. As they walked up to the tarmac, they saw the Director and the Deputy Director already there with a coffin, nearly ready to be loaded onto the plane.

"I want to see her before you load her onto the plane", He was still worried that they might have done a switch like what happened with Freddie Hart's body all those years ago. That still played on his mind and though it wouldn't be as much of a risk mission to get the right body back, it was still something he didn't want to have to deal with. The Director nodded, knowing after his conversation with Commander McGarrett that he would want be sure it was her. "Of course Commander McGarrett". He indicated he come forward while the coffin lid was opened enough for Steve to see it was in fact his mother.

"Thank you for holding to your word Director". The coffin lid was closed again and they began to load it onto the plane's cargo hold of the plane they were travelling on. The plane itself was a passenger aircraft and was carrying Naval and Army service men and women who were either going home to Hawaii or getting ready to be deployed from Hickam airforce base. He shook hands with the Director and then pulled his hand away, turning to face his family. "Come on guys, they are boarding the plane, let's go find our seats".

They were four seats in the middle row and that is where the CIA had them seated, Mary was on on end side, Joan next to her, Steve and then Catherine on the opposite end to Mary. As soon as they were seated and the seatbelt sign on, they put their seatbelts on and Catherine took Steve's hand in hers. Steve didn't know this yet, but when Catherine was speaking to Danny the evening before, he mentioned making sure everyone was there as a show of respect and a sign of love for Steve and for Mary and Joan.

It was going to be a long flight, she knew that Steve didn't sleep much the night before, so she did hope he might get some sleep on the flight home. He had been away from home for around two months and she knew he missed it, and the people he loved and cared for as well. It weighed on his mind, being away from everyone for so long, but she knew they would all understand the reasons why he did what he did and they all would have done the same thing if roles were reversed.

**Author Notes: **

Thank you all so much for all of your patience. I haven't really written anything for this since late November so I appreciate you all sticking by and waiting for the next chapters to come. I hope this is a lovely belated Christmas gift to you all. I wasn't aware where I began this journey on this story that it would turn out the way it has but I am really enjoying writing it and really enjoying going through this journey as well. Getting back home after our holidays, December just became quite busy but finally I have had a bit of downtime to get these next ones done.


	20. Chapter 20

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 20**

There was one small detail about Catherine coming back to Hawaii with Steve to escort Doris back that no one was aware of yet, no one except the Director of the CIA. It was the fact that Catherine Rollins had put in her resignation before getting on that plane to go home to Hawaii. She had a copy of it in her bag and she was planning on showing it to Steve when they were back on Oahu and after they had the funeral service for Doris.

Her father had been in the service as well and she knew all to well about moving around and feeling unsettled many years before she even joined the service. The only time she had ever truly felt settled and at home and belonging somewhere was when she was in Hawaii with Steve. She had been thinking about it ever since Joe White had been killed, but knowing Steve had just lost someone else important to him, it was time she put her feelings into action and did something about it.

Steve was the only man she had ever truly loved, the only man that she could see herself marrying and having a family with. It was time to come home and be the woman that could make him happy like he really deserved to be. She was sure he would be happy about her decision, they had been getting close ever since she helped him get justice for Joe White and being with him now, it did feel like they were like a regular couple again.

The flight had been a long one, and despite trying her hardest, she couldn't seem to sleep during it. It was going to be a painful and hard journey for Steve to go through and that made her worry. Steve was a man that always held his feelings close to his chest, and though Catherine could usually get him to open up, she was still worried that he might close up and not allow himself the time to grieve. He had thrown himself into work when his father and Freddie Hart had died, and same thing when Joe White died, and this time she wanted him to slow down and take the time to grieve with his family by his side.

Their flight had just landed at the joint pearl Harbour-Hickam military base and they had just gotten off the plane. Stepping off the plane and feeling the Hawaiian breeze on her face, it made her feel like she was home. As they got off the plane, Steve had linked his hand in hers, intertwining their fingers together and squeezing softly. With that gesture, she knew that he was grateful that she was there beside him during this difficult time. Squeezing his hand back, she rested her head on his chest, smiling softly when she noticed the whole five-o Ohana standing down on the Tarmac waiting for them.

"You have something to do with this?", Steve asked curiously, his head tilting to the side to get a glimpse of Catherine's face. "Well, maybe.. All I mentioned was what time we were getting in to Danny and that it might be nice for our boy to see some familiar faces when we got in". He stopped for a moment, pulling her into his arms and kissed her softly. "Thank you Cath". Pulling away, their hands still entwined, he began to walk towards everyone, smiling though his heart was aching at what a lucky man he was to have his Ohana with him during this time.

He noticed out of the corner of his eye, as soon as Mary put down a blearly eyed Joan, she ran straight over to her Uncle Danno and cousins Grace and Charlie, the thought of Joan missing Danny and the kids made his heart soar even though the pain. It was sweet and special that his best friend and partner was also the kind of man that would welcome his partner's family into his life as well. Joan was just as much infatuated with her other Uncles and Aunts as she was with Steve and Catherine and it was nice to see they thought of her as family as well.

Danny was the first to step up to Steve to give him a great big bear hug, pulling away so he could look his best friend and partner in the eye, "I'm sorry about your Mom Steve.. We got you though, you know that right? We got your back". Steve offered Danny a smile and nodded, "I know buddy, thanks". As each member of five-o came over to greet Steve, Cath, Mary and Joan, there was one that was notably absent which was Jerry Ortega and there was also a new person there that Catherine hadn't seen before.

Catherine had met Tani Rey and Junior, and she quite liked them, though this new girl, she could instantly tell she was going to get along with her too. There was no arrogance at all. Once she had hugged Steve and offered her condolences, she turned to Catherine and smiled, holding out her hand, "Hi, I'm Sergeant Quinn Liu, I'm with five-o now, used to work for Army CID", Catherine smiled and shook her hand, nodding, "Nice to meet you Sergeant, I'm Lieutenant Catherine Rollins, formally of the US Navy and five-o". She didn't really want to mention the CIA at the moment, mainly because she had already put in her resignation and didn't want to give it away that she had done it till she told Steve.

It was going to be hopefully a nice surprise for him when she finally did tell him and show him the copy of the letter. It was a long time coming and she had to admit she was jealous of Lynn when she first met her, mainly because it seemed she could give him the kind of life that Steve deserved when she couldn't, but now she was getting out of the CIA and coming home.. She could give him the kind go love and life he deserved and while he was grieving right now, she knew it would hopefully bring him a little bit of piece in his life right now knowing she would be here with him.

**Author Notes. **

I can not say it enough, thank you all for all your support, love and just for giving me the inspiration to keep going with this. Even the ones that don't review, I still get email notifications when someone follows the story or adds this to their favourite stories or favourite authors and it really makes me feel so happy to know my work is appreciated and loved. This here is my happy place right now, it is where I feel at home being and it makes it more enjoyable knowing people are reading my work. I don't really have a certain amount of chapters to hit before I call time on this, I didn't really expect to hit 21 chapters in such a short span of time so I hope you are all happy to hang in with me for as long as it takes to ride out this journey.

**SteveMcGarrettLover**

Thank you from the bottom of my heart, it means so much to me that you individually review each chapter. I think you are my number one supporter and possibly number 1 fan on here. I am glad you enjoyed your belated Christmas gift, and hope you enjoy these next two chapters as we ring in the New Year. I love seeing whenever he interacts with kids on the show, even Grace when she was little, Charlie and even little Sara as well so I always will try to make a point of having him interact with Joanie as well. I was always a little annoyed to be honest that one of the cards they read out after Steve and Danny had surgery didn't include Catherine. I am sure she would have heard about it somehow so I wanted to include that in there, her thanking Danny. As for Mary and Joan moving to Hawaii, I do hope they do in the show, but as for my story, the clues are there, they will be moving, it is just a matter of it all happening and being offical, as will Catherine as well. I always try to take things from the show and kind of revisit it in a way for continuity purposes. I'd really love that, to have Joan and Charlie hanging out together. It means a lot you share your thoughts and ideas with me and I feel honoured to try to include them as much as I can into my story.


	21. Chapter 21

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 21 **

The girls made small talk and Catherine introduced Quinn to Mary and Joan while Steve was introduced to the funeral director who would be conducting the funeral for Doris. Though she was still participating in the conversation, she had her eye on Steve, always ready to be by his side in case he needed her. She hadn't introduced herself to Quinn as Steve's ex, though she could sense that Quinn was a quick learner and could see the undeniable connection between the Commander and the Lieutenant.

"You and Steve? Am I reading this right, it seems you two have had some kind of relationship in the past and now have some unfinished business?". Quinn wasn't shy and certainly wasn't one that was used to keeping her opinions and thoughts to herself. Mary chuckled and smirked, nodding her head at the new comer to five-o. "Wow, you have only met Catherine for what? Five minutes and already established that, I like you already".

Quinn and Mary both high fived each other while Catherine's face went a little red, blushing with embarrassment. "As a matter of fact, Steve and I have been involved before.. We haven't really talked things through fully, but yes, I can say we do have some unfinished business that we need talk about and hopefully after we do have that conversation, I might possibly be here a little more regularly". She was still coy about her true intentions, she wanted to talk to Steve about it first, and perhaps Danny since he was the one that had the chat with her last time.

Joanie was now in her Uncle Danny's arms, her head resting on his shoulder, a big yawn escaping her lips. It was a little after nine in the evening now and it had been a long day, and Joan hadn't slept a lot on the plane so she could understand why she was now almost half asleep in Danny's arms. Just at that moment, Steve came back over, "Okay, so this funeral director, his name is Peter Garcia, he is going to transport Doris back to his funeral home, and tomorrow once we have all had a chance to sleep, he is gonna come over to the house so we can get a start on planning the funeral".

Mary nodded, sighing softly at the thought of having to go through this. It was too overwhelming for her and part of her wanted to run and stay away like she had at her father's funeral service, but the other part of her knew it wasn't fair on Steve to deal with it all on his own the way he did all those years ago. Quinn also seemed to sense that, she was very observant and though only knowing her all of twenty minutes or so, she talked her through her feelings in a truly empathetic way. Putting her hand on her shoulder, she looked at the woman that looked so much like Steve, "I've been there, and as hard as it is going to be, you will get through this.. You have a lot of people here that love you and your daughter just as much as they love Steve so it seems so I think you will be fine, eventually".

Right from the get go of meeting her, Steve had this feeling about her even as she was holding a firearm up to him and Danny, and this just showed it in spades. Comforting his sister, a woman she had never met before. Looking up to the sky, he thanked whomever it was that brought this Ohana into his life. He knew he was one lucky man to have this kind of love and support around him. It was what helped get him up out of bed sometimes, just knowing he had people that he loved to protect and that had his own back. Mary nodded and reached up to put her hand over the top of Quinn's and smiled softly. "Thank you so much, I appreciate that".

Danny walked over to them, "I'm sorry to interrupt guys", his words were soft and whispered, having not long heard a soft snore coming from the little body in his arms, "Why don't we get this young lady home and into bed, and I'm sure you three could go for a good sleep at home too.. Junior's gonna stay at my place tonight so that Mary and Joan can have the spare room at your place, and no I don't want to hear any objections to this at all Mary, Junior was the one that offered to let you guys stay at your brother's while you are here".

The more Mary thought about it, the more she realised that being here was good for them. Sure she had friends in Los Angeles and a good job and Joan went to a good school and had some good friends, but this was her home.. It was where their family was and if Mary needed a night off from being a full time single mother and enjoying herself, then she knew her brother or one of her adopted brothers would look after Joan for her. "Thanks Danny, it means a lot to us both, I'll thank Junior as well before we leave here". Junior, Lou and Grover picked up their luggage and walked over to the cars as Danny walked with Joan still in his arms, and Grace with her little brother in her arms who was nearly asleep as well. Behind them were the girls, Catherine, Mary, Quinn and Tani walking slowly and talking amongst themselves.

Before they all got in their own cars and took off for the evening, Steve asked for their attention for a moment, "I just want to thank you all for being here for me, Mary and Joanie, it means a lot to us and you guys truly are Ohana to us". His eyes were a little glazed over with tiredness and misty from holding back tears and it was a struggle to hold back the lump in his throat, but he managed. As each of them all gave him one last hug as the hearse drove off towards the funeral home, his heart swelled with love and pride for his family. It wasn't the first time and certainly wasn't going to be the last time he considered himself the luckiest man on the universe.

**Author Notes. **

I can not say it enough, thank you all for all your support, love and just for giving me the inspiration to keep going with this. Even the ones that don't review, I still get email notifications when someone follows the story or adds this to their favourite stories or favourite authors and it really makes me feel so happy to know my work is appreciated and loved. This here is my happy place right now, it is where I feel at home being and it makes it more enjoyable knowing people are reading my work. I don't really have a certain amount of chapters to hit before I call time on this, I didn't really expect to hit 21 chapters in such a short span of time so I hope you are all happy to hang in with me for as long as it takes to ride out this journey.


	22. Chapter 22

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 22**

It had been a long couple of days for the McGarrett's and for Catherine, however as soon as he unlocked the door to his home, he felt some kind of relief knowing he was home again. He had been away from his home for around two months and the familiar smells and the sound of his dog Eddie barking as he walked through the door, he had missed all that a lot. "Come here Eddie, Did you miss me, I missed you to buddy", he knelt down and cuddled with Eddie for a moment, patting him before he let him go, not noticing the amused faces of Mary and Catherine.

Mary had Joan on her hip, she was still asleep and hadn't woken up when she got her out of the car, that showed how tired the six year old was. "I think Joan and I are gonna head up to bed now, she is still sound asleep and I don't think I won't be far behind once my head hits the pillows". She walked over to her brother who had stood up and she kissed his cheek, and he in turn kissed Joanie's forehead. "Night Mare, I love you both".

After saying goodnight to Catherine, Mary headed up stairs to the spare bedroom with Joan, happily surprised that Junior had tided the room up and even thought to put clean sheets on the bed. He didn't need to go to that trouble and yet here he was, going that extra mile for her. Once she put Joan down, she headed into the shower to take a nice hot shower to relax her tired muscles before jumping into bed, it was nice being back in her childhood home.

It might be her brother's home now, but Steve always made her feel like it was still her home as well and though she was seriously considering moving back to the island, she did know that she would want to look for a house of her own, one that she and Joan could live in and be a family in without crowding her brother and his housemate. She also got a feeling that she would be seeing more of Catherine as well, she wasn't sure how she knew, but she just had a gut feeling that Catherine would be here more often and she liked that idea and approved very much.

Meanwhile, though Catherine knew that Steve wouldn't be able to go straight to sleep even if he was really tired so she grabbed two beers from the fridge and then headed out to the Lānai where Steve had ended up to take Eddie to the bathroom. She walked down to the chairs that were placed near the water and smiled as she sat down on the free seat, Steve having already occupied the other seat and handed him his beer, then opening her own and taking a sip. "So, you have a dog?", her words were accompanied by a slight smirk on her face, knowing his feelings towards dogs.

"Alright, alright, I know where you are going with this", he chuckled, sipping on his own beer. "Eddie is a dog that is a trained sniffer dog, he was with the DEA and he got shot, his owner was killed and so we both kind of took a shining to each other, I'll still have you know that cats are the far superior animal but I can appreciate dogs a little more, especially my man Eddie here". Catherine nodded at that and smiled softly, she could tell as soon as the two saw each other when he walked in that he had an emotional connection to this dog and now she knew why, they had been through a lot together and Steve was there for Eddie when he needed him the most.

"You have gotten a lot more sentimental since living here permanently Sailor, and grown a lot.. I'm proud of you". She truly was proud of his growth and how much he had changed, she had seen it while she was living with him but this was much more of a personal growth. The man that claimed at one point he would never live permanently on the island was now living here in his childhood home, quite happily it seemed and had a lot of people he considered to be family around him as well. "Thanks, it means a lot to me, you have grown a lot as well Lieutenant, and though I was hurt when you left again, I realised why you did and I understand it". Catherine reached over and took his hand, her touch instantly bringing memories back to him, his head turning to look at her, gazing into her eyes, realising she was trying to tell him something without saying it.

He could sense she had something to say to him, something that was important and he knew it was possibly something hard for her to do.. "Catherine, whatever you need to say, you can tell me. I think by now you know that I'm not going to mad at anything.. If anything, it might help make sense of everything". He squeezed her hand gently, his focus remaining on her, his eyes never leaving hers as she continued to struggle to find the words to what she wanted to say.

Finally finding her words, she spoke quietly, "I'm not sure you do Steve.. I only did it because I was forced to Steve.. You know the CIA by now okay, they had threatened your life and the lives of the rest of the five-o taskforce because you didn't back down about what went on with Doris and Yeo Fat.. They came to me when I was in Afghanistan, they knew who I was and who I was to you". She sighed softly, this was hard for her to say.. She heard him say he wouldn't get mad but she knew he would at least in part at the CIA, maybe not her but certainly the CIA.

"The recruited me as a way of sparing your life and that of the taskforce.. If I didn't cooperate and join the CIA, then they would continue to try to make hits against your life and they didn't care if it meant potentially taking out other members of five-o or civilans, so I had no other choice at all Steve.. I wasn't going to let them come after you, the man that I love". The tears were falling from her eyes.. This is what she had wanted to tell him from day one, and every other time they had talked since. It was finally out now and she just hoped and prayed with all her heart that it wouldn't affect what they were potentially starting again with their relationship. She knew she had to be 100% honest with him this time and before they entered into anything, she wanted him to have all the facts.

**Author's Notes. **

Thank you again for all your support. I always say this in my Author notes but it truly does mean a lot to me and makes the difference in when you are writing a story. Knowing you have people that read it and appreciate it, it is what keeps me continuing this story. I am starting to think of this as a kind of continuation of my Winds of Change story. I will go back to that at some point, but I may leave it to where they leave each other at the end of that episode but that they have started to stay in more regular communication with each other after that.

**SteveMcGarrettLover**

Thank you, I appreciate your amazing reviews, I love them all so much. I really love in my story at least, she is leaving the CIA. I do think she would get along with Quinn as well, a lot of people might see Quinn as a threat, but I see her as another friend. That is an excellent idea, to have the girls all together doing something. I love the girls on this series and even Magnum P.I are all strong and powerful as much as the men are. Exactly as well, it is a sad occasion as to why they are all there together, but it doesn't mean that the story as a whole can't have a happy outcome. I am trying to be aware of the situation and the fact Steve and Mary will both have good days and bad, but that they can still move forward and get a positive out of it all.

**HeyD501**

Thank you, I really appreciate you taking the time to read my story. Happy New Year to you as well.

**Pilarmnavas**

Thank you for reading my story. I am happy to hear you are enjoying it. No, it is not finished yet, not sure when I am going to finish this one, I do want to show them getting married eventually and having some kids, so who knows If I stay with this one, or I finish it at some point and start another story as like a sequel to continue the story. I always try my hardest to make the McRoll shippers happy but also everyone else as well. I like knowing my stories are well loved by McRoll shippers, but I do like adding other elements as well so other people can read and still enjoy even if they don't ship McRoll. It would be amazing if the writers of H50 saw my writing, it would be a dream come true, but who knows lol. I'd love there to be some McRoll in S10, we can only hope.. It has been an annual tradition since she left in S6, and I did read somewhere that they aren't done with their story yet.


	23. Chapter 23

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 23**

Hearing her say all of that, it was like a weight had finally lifted off his shoulders. He had long suspected that her joining the CIA was not her idea, nor was it something she would have willingly participated in unless there was a reason and the reason was that she was keeping him safe. "To be honest Cath, and this is nothing against your abilities because I think you would have been recruited on your own merits as well, but I did think that was a possibility, that you had been recruited because of your relationship to me and to five-o.. I only say that because I know how much you despised the CIA as well, so it didn't make sense to me that you would join them all of a sudden out of the blue".

His hand remained enclosed with hers for the duration of this talk, his fingers entwining around hers, his eyes only briefly moving away from her and that was to keep an eye on Eddie, to make sure he wasn't going far away. Not that he would, he had missed his Daddy and wanted to be as close to Steve as he could.. His gaze went back to Catherine though and he sighed softly knowing for the first time just exactly the amount of pain that had been caused at the hands of the CIA. First they take his mother away from him by having her fake her own death and re-joining them, all the attempts they made on his life, losing Catherine to them and now losing his Mother to them.

"I'm so sorry Steve, I really wanted to tell you". Her voice was breaking, nearly trembling as she said those words. She never wanted to lie to him again after not telling him about her mother and the fight they had gotten into during the undercover op when she went under with the Diamond Dolls roller derby team. Using the hand that was enjoined with hers, he gently pulled her up and guided her over to his seat and pulled himself up as well, his free hand resting on her cheek, his eyes gazing deeply into hers. "I know you did and I know you were ordered to not tell me so I understand the reason why you couldn't tell me Cath.. We have been on dozens of missions where we couldn't tell the other what we were doing".

On the inside, he was seething, not at Catherine but at the fact that this was yet another thing the CIA took from him. If they hadn't recruited her, she would have been free to stay in Hawaii and he would have proposed to her, and they would have been happily married for a few years at least.. That lost time was time they could never get back now, so was he angry? Of course he was, but he wasn't angry at Catherine. She had a job to do, a mission to go on and orders to not tell anyone where she was going or what she was doing. Her tears were still flowing down her face, the pad of his thumb gently wiping a tear drop away, "You're angry though", she whispered in a soft sad voice, looking down at the ground, not wanting to look him in the eye right now.

Using his fingers under her chin, he gently guided her head back to him and looked at her, "Look at me Cath". When she finally let her eyes meet his, he squeezed her hand that he was still holding, "Yes, I'm angry, but I promise you, I'm not angry at you.. I'm just angry that the CIA has taken those years from us.. We could have been married by now, maybe had a kid or two, but we will never know because of them". She had to smile when he mentioned marriage and children and she sighed a huge sigh of relief knowing he wasn't angry at her and that this information didn't seem to be affecting them. "That's true, however they can't control us anymore, and they don't control our future Steve".

With his confused look on his face, she knew he was wondering what she meant by that. She was going to wait till after Doris's funeral to tell him this, but now with her coming clean about why she had joined the CIA, now was a good a time as any to tell him she was leaving it.. "Wait here a moment, I'll be back". She untangled her hand from his and headed inside to find her duffel bag, and taking out the letter, she walked back out to the Lānai where Steve was still standing where she had left him. "I was going to show you this after the funeral services was over and once you were settled a bit more at home, but after sharing what I have tonight, I think now is the right time".

Handing him the copy of the resignation letter, she added, "You might want to sit down for that too". As he began to read the letter, she waited with baited breath to see what his reaction would be to it. He carefully read the whole letter in which she stated she was resigning effective immediately from the CIA and that though she had enjoyed the experience even though she was coerced into joining, she decided that she wanted to settle down and put down some permanent roots in her life. Halfway through reading, he did feel the need to sit down, sitting on the seat he had occupied just before, Catherine sitting back down in the chair next to him. She also mentioned very clearly in the letter that five-o was off limits and that now that Doris McGarrett had been killed in the line of duty, they were to leave her son and his family alone for good.

She didn't make any direct threats in the letter, however her intentions were clear, that should they mess with five- and more importantly Steve McGarrett, she wouldn't let that rest. His eyes were getting a little misty as he came to the realisation of just what that resignation letter meant. He kept re-reading the part about how she wanted to settle down and put down permanent roots.. Catherine was feeling a little nervous, not sure of his reaction but when he looked up and he was smiling at her, she smiled back.. "You've resigned, to settle down and put some permanent roots down?", he couldn't help but question. Before she could answer, he added quickly, "And where do you think you'd want to settle down and put down some roots then Lieutenant?"

She smiled softly, a tiny red hue on her cheeks showing, her heart racing a little when he asked her that question. "I'm not getting any younger you know and I'd like to try the whole settling down thing before I get too old". Standing up and walking over to him, she sat on his lap and leaned in, pressing her lips against his own, relishing in the feeling of his lips against hers. "Well Commander, I was thinking about settling down here in Hawaii, if that is quite okay with you?" Kissing her back softly, letting a small moan escape the back of his throat, he nodded, pulling away slightly to answer her question. "That is very much okay with me.. I only have one request". Her fingers were fiddling with the collar of his shirt as he spoke, and she nodded, "and that is?", answering him back coyly.

"Move back in with me.. I mean we can still take our time and go as slowly or as quickly as we feel is comfortable, but having you in the same bed the last few days", he stopped for a moment for a breath before he continued, "I realised just how much I've missed it, missing your scent, your touch and just knowing you were there to wake up with me the next morning". He missed her more than he ever realised, it was why he ended up breaking things off with Lynn as well. It wasn't fair on her keeping things casual when he couldn't give her more than what she wanted or needed. Leaning in again, she kissed him softly and pulled away, "I wouldn't want it any other way Sailor".

Her arms were wrapped around his neck and just at that moment, she happened to glance at the time, "It's late, we should head up to bed, try to get some sleep.. We have a big morning ahead of us, talking to the funeral planner and director about the service". Steve nodded, sitting up a little so he could kiss her again. Losing his mother was painful and hard, but the one good thing to come out of it all, it was that Catherine was still by his side once again. She had proven herself over and over, time and time again. She had gotten him when his mother was being held by the CIA for trying to help Wo Fat's father escape, then she was there when Joe White was killed, and now with his mother.. Catherine stood up and helped to pull him to his feet, picking up the nearly empty beer bottles. She could sense he needed a moment alone so she leaned in and kissed him softly, "I'll be waiting upstairs for you.. I love you Sailor". As she walked away, she could hear him call back to her, "I love you too Cath".

** Author's Notes. **

Thank you again for all your support. I always say this in my Author notes but it truly does mean a lot to me and makes the difference in when you are writing a story. Knowing you have people that read it and appreciate it, it is what keeps me continuing this story. I am starting to think of this as a kind of continuation of my Winds of Change story. I will go back to that at some point, but I may end that one to where they leave each other at the end of that episode but that they have started to stay in more regular communication with each other after that.

I know I mentioned that I'd leave the news of Catherine's resignation till after the funeral services, but this seemed like the right time to tie it all in with why she joined the CIA. I have always wanted to go into that and have Catherine tell him the reason why. I do believe that is why she joined, because she was coerced by the CIA so they wouldn't hurt Steve.

I'd like to also add something somewhere, even if it's a one shot where she hears about Grace's accident and maybe reaches out to Steve, Danny and even Rachel even if it's just by phone. Maybe I might even do a one shot where she surprises them by visiting at Danny's home on the day Grace comes home from hospital.


	24. Chapter 24

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 24**

Waking up to the ocean breeze from the open bedroom window, Mary smiled softly. This was the bedroom she had slept in as a child, Steve's old bedroom had been turned into another living area for Junior so that if both of them wanted to watch different television shows, they had two spaces to do so. It was a nice set up but she did wonder if Catherine moved back in, if Junior would want to still continue to live there. Perhaps he could move in with Tani one day, she wasn't born yesterday, she could see the chemistry between those two even if Steve had mentioned nothing had been made offical yet.

Honestly, she liked being able to wake up with the knowledge that she could be more involved in the lives of her family, of her own little Ohana and the more she thought about it, the more she wanted to come move here permanently. Los Angeles might have been her home for many years, but aside from some good friends she and Joan had made whom they could visit at any time and could come visit them in Hawaii, her family was here and now especially that it was just her, Steve and Joan left of the McGarrett clan, she wanted to be more involved in her brother's life and wanted her brother to have more involvement in her daughter's life as well.

Before she told anyone else of her plans, she needed to talk to Joan first, and see how she felt about the possibility of moving to Hawaii. Her daughter had a lot of friends in Los Angeles and was doing well in school as well so she didn't want to pull her out of school and away from her friends unless Joan was happy with the idea of moving. She might just be six years of age, but in these kinds of situations, Mary wasn't like a lot of other parents. She didn't just tell her child to do as she said, she wanted to give her the opportunity to say her thoughts.

Having just come back in from the bathroom, Mary smiled at her daughter as she closed the bedroom door so that her and Mary could get dressed for the day. Mary was sitting on the now made bed and held her hands out to her daughter, "Sweetheart, there is something I'd like to talk to you about and get your thoughts on". She patted the bed next to her and watched as Joan moved to sit up on the bed, "What's wrong Mommy?", she was curious but also not overly worried. Her Mom asked her things like this all the time.

"Well, nothing is wrong really.. I was thinking though.. What would you think about possibly moving to Hawaii?" The little girl let out a shriek that was sure to wake up Steve and Cath if they weren't up already and launched herself into her mother's arms, her eyes big and wide with excitement, "please, momma can we, can we please?" The little girl clung to her mother, wanting her mother to say yes so desperately. Mary smiled and began to laugh softly, "I'm glad you are happy with that idea, I do want you to think about it though. It does mean you would be moving away from your school and your friends".

Joan nodded her head as though she had already thought about that, "I know and I'll miss them, but I'd rather be here with Uncle Steve, Uncle Danny and everyone else, and they can visit and we can visit". Mary hugged her daughter and squeezed her lightly. She was such a mature young girl at the tender young age of six and had her head screwed on right. Whenever Mary had doubts about the kind of parent she wanted to be, she thought of these moments to realise she was doing something right.

"I'm really happy you are excited to move to Hawaii, Mommy wanted to but I also wanted you to have an opinion as well and if you didn't want to go, then we wouldn't have". Joan smiled happily and kissed her mother on the cheek, "Of course, someone needs to keep an eye on Uncle Steve", she answered her in a matter of fact way before she got down off the bed and began to dig out some clothes to wear for the day, Mary holding back a laugh at how much like her Uncle Danny she was. She too stood up and began to get dressed, putting on a summery dress and some sandals.

Once they were both dressed, Mary held out her hand, "How bout we go tell your Uncle Steve and Aunt Cath the good news then, I am sure they will both be very excited and happy to hear our news". It was not forgotten on Mary as to why they were all here in this house together, and whenever she felt like crying, she tried to focus on her family and that her mother's death was perhaps some kind of blessing in disguise because it was bringing them back to Hawaii, to the place where it all started. They both had to move away from the island where their mother was supposedly killed, and Steve had been back for years.. Now it was time for Mary to come back home as well.

**Author's Notes**

Again, I want to thank you all for your ongoing support. It means so much to me that you all love it enough to review and continue to read. I hope you don't mind there was no Steve and Cath in this chapter. They are my main source of creativity and the main ship in this story, but I do enjoy writing for the other characters as well. I think it's what makes a good story, that the focus isn't always on the main pairing. Writing these chapters have been able to get my mind off of everything that is happening in our country right now. If you have turned on the news or read social media, Australia is in one of its worst bushfire seasons to date and we still have two months of summer to go. Please keep Australia in your thoughts and if you feel the need to want to donate, PM me and I'll give you some links to go to where you can donate.

**SteveMcGarrettLover:**

-slaps hand on my head- Doh, I also not long watched that episode as well so I am not sure why that didn't stick with me that Catherine would have already known about Eddie. I don't mind you putting those things out to me, if it's only minor things that can use adjusting here and then, I'm doing well. I'm a huge fan of the re-booted Magnum P.I as well. Funnily enough, I haven't seen either the original Hawaii-five o or the original Magnum P.I, but I love the newer versions. I'm very much looking forward to the cross-overs though not sure when I'll get to see the cross over ep for Magnum P.I as we are a few episodes behind where they are up to for the cross over. I am glad you think so with Winds of Change.. It was meant to be basically what this story is, a chance at love again and she was meant to leave the CIA back then, but when I began this one, this one feels more like it is already heading in that direction. I'll do those one shots at some point as well.

**St: **

Thank you so much, I am glad you are enjoying this story. I am really happy I am sending them both in that direction to finally be together as well. I really hope that before the show ends, they do end up together.


	25. Chapter 25

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 25**

Steve and Catherine had been awake early, they both still had their early morning routines, both going for a run and then a swim before coming in and having a shower in Steve's ensuite bathroom so they had heard the small excited sounding shriek coming from the bedroom where Mary and Joan had spent the night in.. "I wonder what that is all about?", Steve was the first to ask as they dressed once they had finished in the shower. "I'm sure whatever it is, we will find out soon enough, sounded like someone is excited about something".

Once Steve had come back inside the previous night, the two of them had a short make out session before falling asleep. As much as they wanted to do more, Catherine remembered the time when Mary had overheard them in bed and had vowed never to do that again while there was a guest staying right near their bedroom, she had memories from the night before to hold her over anyway, when they were still in the hotel room, but she knew she wouldn't be able to last much longer without jumping him. Every time with him still felt like the first time.

Steve must have been thinking the same thing as well as he backed her into the bedroom door and kissed her softly. "Mmm can't wait to have this place all to ourselves for a while". She smiled and giggled softly, moaning in response. "I can't wait either.. but for now, why don't we go and get started on breakfast, I think maybe some pancakes, maybe bacon, eggs and toast as well". She kissed him again before opening the door and pushing away from him to head downstairs, leaving him smirking behind her before he put his shirt on and did the buttons up, leaving the door open to catch the breeze as he walked out onto the landing and heading downstairs.

By the time Mary and Joan were walking downstairs, Catherine had set the outdoor table that was on the Lānai for four and Steve was finishing up in the kitchen, "Good Morning bro", Mary greeted him with a kiss to the cheek, "Can I help with anything?", she asked as he picked up Joan for a good morning cuddle and kiss. "Good morning Sis, and Good Morning Joanie, yeah, you can make the coffee and get Joanie here a drink if you like". He put Joan down and smiled at her, "Why don't you head out and take a seat at the table Joanie, and maybe take this plate of toast with you". He passed her the toast as she smiled wide, happy to do something to help out.

After they had finished eating breakfast, they were sitting around taking, sipping on their coffee and juice when at the same time both Mary and Cath began speaking, saying the exact same words, "Guess what". They all had a quick laugh and Catherine told Mary to go ahead first, "Do you want to tell them Joanie?", she asked her daughter who had just finished off her glass of juice and looked like she was about to burst with excitement, "Mommy and I are moving to the island". Steve and Catherine looked at the girls with surprise, "Wow, that is amazing, I'm so happy to hear that, I'll be able to do so much more Uncle/Niece dates with you".

He held out his hand to high five Joanie while he leant over and kissed Mary on the cheek, Catherine speaking up now as well, "I always knew you would find your way back to the island Mary, that is wonderful news". She smiled brightly and looked over at Steve who leant in the other direction and squeezed her hand encouragingly, "Speaking of moving, I'll be making a move of my own as well". She didn't say anything more, wanting Mary and Joan to be curious enough to ask, "That's nice Cath, where you moving to?", Mary wanted it to be here Hawaii, but she did wonder if she was perhaps just moving to where her parents lived as well.

"Well, I'm moving here actually.. Into this very house". At that news, Mary couldn't hold back her excitement and got up off her seat to go hug her future sister in law, giving a little squeal of joy as Catherine stood up to hug her back. "I'm so happy for you both", when she pulled back from the hug, she looked into Catherine's eyes and added quietly for just her and Cath to hear, "You have made Steve the happiest man on the island right now". Smiling back, Catherine's eyes softened, "I think in the midst of all the tragedy, we have all given each other something to be happy about, I'm thrilled you and Joanie are moving back here as well".

Once the girls had hugged, Joanie went to hug her Aunt Catherine while Mary and Steve hugged as well. Steve decided to go clean the breakfast dishes and asked Joan to help him to bring everything inside to clean while her Mom and Aunt Catherine continued to talk for a moment, "I know you want to know, my job with the CIA". Catherine was very perceptive, she knew exactly what was on Mary's mind and she wanted to know how her job would be able to accommodate her moving her. Mary chuckled and nodded her head, reaching to take a sip of her coffee. "I'm curious, let's put it that way".

As they continued the discussion about Catherine and why she was recruited to the CIA to start with and that she was now resigning and why, it all made sense to Mary.. In the last few years, Steve had some close calls himself and had lost some important people to him, so it was only natural that Catherine would want to quit her job and move here on a more permanent basis, it was exactly why Mary was doing so herself. After Steve got shot in the helicopter, and had to have a liver transplant, She dreaded every time the phone rang, wondering if someone from her Hawaii Ohana was ringing to bring her bad news, and losing her mother made her realise she needed more time with her brother so she could understand why Catherine felt the need to move as well. As she looked over towards the kitchen, she smiled softly at seeing her daughter in the kitchen, spending quality time with her Uncle and making new memories.

**Author's Notes**

Again, I want to thank you all for your ongoing support. It means so much to me that you all love it enough to review and continue to read. Writing these chapters have been able to get my mind off of everything that is happening in our country right now. If you have turned on the news or read social media, Australia is in one of its worst bushfire seasons to date and we still have two months of summer to go. Please keep Australia in your thoughts and if you feel the need to want to donate, PM me and I'll give you some links to go to where you can donate.


	26. Chapter 26

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 26**

"Why don't you go play in the living room while the adults meet with the funeral director sweetie", Mary could see that Joan would get bored easily when they were talking to the funeral director about all of the arrangements and planning the funeral service. "I want to stay with you Mommy", came her soft voice. She had been excited at the news that they were going to be moving back to Hawaii, but now she realised that the more somber part of the morning was about to begin and she wanted to be around her Mom to comfort her.

Just as Mary was about to say something, Steve knelt down to her level and put his hands on her shoulders, "I know you do pumpkin, but you know what.. Eddie has to stay out of room as well and I think I need a helper to help keep Eddie company for a while", he looked at his niece with a smile, "Do you know of anyone that could do that?", he purposely asked her in that way so that she would suggest herself.. "I know, I know". He chuckled at her answer and nodded, "and who might that be?", his line of question sounded curious as though he hadn't worked it out yet. She put her hand up, "Me silly".

With her hand in the air, he moved one of his own and gave her a high five, "Well, that is awesome, I bet Eddie would love to hear just how well you have gotten at reading, so why don't you sit on the couch over there and read to him, and when we're all finished, I might take you for a tour of the five-o offices, I have it on good authority we might see Charlie there". High fiveing him back, she nodded happily, "Then we can tell Uncle Danno, Charlie and everyone else we are staying in Hawaii". He nodded his head as he pulled her into his arms for a hug, "That we can certainly do, they will all be so excited to hear that news".

The funeral director came not long after and once Joan was settled in with a drink, a cookie and a few good books to read to Eddie, the adults, Steve, Mary, Catherine and the funeral director Peter went to sit down in the dinning room, Steve sitting in between his sister and his girlfriend, one of them each taking a hand and holding onto him as they began to get everything organised and planned. Danny had managed to get in contact with a solicitor whom had written up Doris McGarrett's last will and testament. It stated that her share in the house now belonged to Steve and the half a million dollars trust fund that was sent up before she was killed was to go to her so far only living grandchild Joan McGarrett and her daughter Mary.

There wasn't many other assets that Doris had, she had left a lot of her belongings in the house that she lived in with her family, being a CIA agent for so many years, she didn't hold onto much, but she did mention in a letter that there were some things of Steve and Mary's she had kept in the attic. The rest of the business was surrounding her funeral service. She hadn't wanted a big funeral, just a small one with her family present, she wanted her favourite song 'Over the mountain, across the sea' by Johnnie and Joe to be played and she wanted to be buried with the one true love of her life, the one man she had never stopped loving despite the years, her husband John McGarrett.

The CIA was organising to clear out her office space, any classified intel would be kept with them, and any of Doris's personal effects would be sent back to Hawaii as would be her personal effects from the apartment she kept in Washington as well. There wasn't much there at all, but they did want to pass on her things to Commander McGarrett and his family for them to decide what to keep and what not to keep. Throughout it all, Mary had tears in her eyes, yet Steve just couldn't bring himself to cry right now. He was stoic and headstrong and at the same time, Catherine could sense the tension in his body, the way he was sitting. It was affecting him, he just didn't want to bring attention to it.

"So, the day after tomorrow, the service will be held in our funeral chapel, and then we will do a more private gathering for the more immediate family when we take her to the National Cemetry to be buried with your father". Peter Garcia was honoured to be doing this for the McGarrett family. He had been the one to conduct John McGarrett's funeral and also Deb McGarrett's as well, and though he knew Doris McGarrett had a complicated history with her children, he was honoured that Detective Williams had thought of him when he had organised to make these arrangements with the family. He stood up, Steve, Mary and Catherine all standing up as well as he shook hands with the three of them.

Steve showed him out and thanked him for all his assistance, and sighed softly when he had closed the door. It had been a long morning and looking over to his left into the living room, he smiled softly when he noticed a small body laying on the sofa sound asleep, Eddie keeping a close watch over her. He took a blanket off one of the other chairs and wrapped it, putting it over her small body to keep her warm. Even though it was usually always warmer weather in Hawaii, it still brought rain and the cold on occasion. Walking back into the dinning room, he stopped short of going in, hearing Mary crying and Catherine comforting her. It warmed his heart to know that his girlfriend was there supporting his sister when she needed it.

He backed away from the scene, not wanting to disturb the two, and headed for the kitchen to put a fresh pot of coffee on for the three of them. Part of him wanted to get back to his normal routine and get back into work but he knew that he needed to take this time and grieve with his family. Though he couldn't help himself from taking his phone out of his pocket and calling Danny at work to make sure they didn't need any help at all. Just as the coffee was brewed, Danny answered. He put the phone between his shoulder and his ear, "I'm doing alright Danny, thanks, I just wanted to make sure you guys are okay, you don't need me down there at all?" Mary had Catherine and Steve had Danny when they just needed someone to listen and both Steve and Catherine had each other. There wasn't a better feeling in the world than that.

**Author's Notes. **

Thank you again for all your support during this story. I am really loving where it is heading so far, and I'm really happy with how it's progressing as well. I am sorry for the delay in the updates, I am on the late shift at work this week so it's been tough to be able to write. I'm thrilled that this has gotten as far as it has so thus far and I'm looking forward to doing perhaps a sequel once this is done. I'd like to see Cath and Steve married with a kid or two, and maybe even Mary settling down, Danny settling back down with Rachel like he is meant to. Got so many idea, always too little a time.

**SteveMcGarrettLover: **

I think that was the way it sent the notifications. It sent it to my email that same way. I even went back and checked to make sure I hadn't uploaded the chapters in the wrong order. We are doing okay, we aren't directly near the fires, but we are still getting the smoke haze every now and then. Yes I am wanting some advise on that. So far I haven't gone to much in detail with smut scenes, how far would you readers like me to go in terms of detail? I'd like to know your thoughts as I'm not sure how much is too much or too little. I used to be very detailed and graphic in my Destiel SPN smut scenes, but would like some thoughts here as well. That goes for you all as well any advice is appreciated because I don't want my readers to feel uncomfortable if it feels too detailed or too graphic for you.


	27. Chapter 27

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 27**

If anything, he felt a bit more refreshed after his conversation with Danny which consisted of being longer than he had anticipated. Danny at times got on his nerves like a brother would, and yet at the same time, he always relished in getting his opinion or thoughts about something, especially when it was something serious. He had missed hearing Danny's voice and the banter they had together with him while he was gone and it was nice to hear his voice again and not surprisingly, he had god advice for Steve as well.

He reminded Steve that he needed to heal and needed time to grieve, and be with his family who knew what he was going through. Once he finished the phone call, he made the coffee's and being careful not to walk in and interrupt, he smiled softly when he heard soft voices now talking more upbeat about the move to Hawaii for both Mary, Joan and Catherine. "Thought you both could use a coffee, I know I can too". He smiled softly as he sat back down where he had been sitting before and passed a steaming hot cup of coffee to Mary and Catherine, keeping one to himself. "Thanks big bro, Is Joan okay in there? I can't hear her reading".

Steve pulled out his phone and opened up his photo app, showing them the photo he had taken of Joan snuggled up under the blanket he had put on her with one of Eddie's paws resting on top of hers, "She's out like a light.. I figure when she wakes up, perhaps we can go grab some lunch at Kamakona's shrimp truck and then we can get some extra to take back to the team.. I promised Joanie I'd give her a tour of five-o and since Danny is there doing paperwork all day, Charlie is with him while Grace and Rachel tour a couple of the colleges on the island".

Both Mary and Catherine loved that idea, everyone knew that Kamakona's shrimp truck was one of the best places to eat on the island and Catherine was looking forward to seeing everyone again as well. She hadn't really seen Charlie since Steve had told her that he was in fact Danny's son and not Stan's as everyone thought for so many years. "Sounds like a good idea bro, I will need to talk to Danny as well about the school Charlie goes to, see what if he thinks it would be a good school for Joan to attend". Catherine as well could see that Steve was itching to get back to work to see how much paperwork had piled up on his desk over the last couple of months too.

"I know you Steve, you will want to do work while you are there, so if you need a hand with any of the paperwork, I'm your girl". Catherine knew how much he despised having to do paperwork so anything she could help him with, she was happy to do. "Thanks Cath, I might take you up on that offer depending how much is there". He wanted to speak to Danny first, but he wanted to offer an invitation for her to join back up to five-o if she wanted to. They had Tani, and Quinn and another female, especially one as fierce as Catherine.

He knew it would be a tight squeeze, but he was looking at extending the officer a bit further out, they still had room to do some renovations and with their team now growing in size, they needed the extra room. It would feel like coming home if she was to agree to coming back to five-o. He loved whenever they worked together, they were always in sync with the other, and could speak without even talking, one look and they knew exactly what the other was planning to do. At that moment, Joan woke up, and came into the dinning room where they were all still talking. She got up onto her Uncle's lap yawning a little as he wrapped his arm around her waist and leaned in, kissing her head.

"So good of you to join us sleepy head, we were thinking about going out for some lunch and then visiting five-o, and maybe even stop in at HPD to see Uncle Duke, what do you think?" She smiled, her sleepiness quickly fading away, bouncing up and down in her Uncle's arms, "Can we go to Uncle Kammi's for lunch?" Mary chuckled and patted her daughter on the back lightly. "We figured you would ask that so we have already agreed to go, besides, where else would we want to go for lunch?" She noticed her daughter's hair had gotten a little messed up from her sleep and chuckled.

"How bout you go and get the hairbrush and the water spray bottle so I can fix your hair up and then we can get out of here and on our way to lunch already, we're starving". Joanie giggled when she heard her Uncle's stomach rumble at the exact same time as Mary mentioning they were starving. "Okay Mommy". She jumped off Steve's lap and ran upstairs, Mary calling after her to be careful and slow down on the stair case. "Just like you Sis.. She reminds me of a mini Mary. If Mom had to remind you once, she had to remind you a million times not to run on the stair case".

Mary slapped her brother playfully on the arm and smirked, "Yeah, well I wasn't the only one.. I remember Mom constantly having to remind to remind you to wear your helmet when you rode your bike or skateboard around the neighbourhood". Next to them, Catherine sat smiling softly, just watching the playful banter. She remembered the promise she had made Deb McGarrett when she had first been diagnosed with a brain tumour.. She promised to keep those two close, now she hadn't done a lot to facilitate that, it seemed those two had done well on their own and she was really happy to see it how close they had grown over the years. They were family and despite what they had to deal with in their lives, they were finally coming back together as a proper family unit and Catherine for one couldn't be happier to be apart of that.

**Author's Notes. **

Thank you again for all your support during this story. I am really loving where it is heading so far, and I'm really happy with how it's progressing as well. I am sorry for the delay in the updates, I am on the late shift at work this week so it's been tough to be able to write. I'm thrilled that this has gotten as far as it has so thus far and I'm looking forward to doing perhaps a sequel once this is done. I'd like to see Cath and Steve married with a kid or two, and maybe even Mary settling down, Danny settling back down with Rachel like he is meant to. Got so many idea, always too little a time.

Also wanting some advice that I'd like your thoughts on as readers… So far I haven't gone to much in detail with smut scenes involving Catherine and Steve, how far would you readers like me to go in terms of detail? I'd like to know your thoughts as I'm not sure how much is too much or too little. I used to be very detailed and graphic in my Destiel SPN smut scenes, but would like some thoughts here as well. That goes for you all as well any advice is appreciated because I don't want my readers to feel uncomfortable if it feels too detailed or too graphic for you.


	28. Chapter 28

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 28**

Kamakona had been made aware of what was going on with the big kuhna and his family. To be honest, he had missed seeing him around the shrimp truck the last couple of months. The man could certainly eat, though him not being here didn't cut into his profits at all. He was still doing a busy trade each and every day, but it was a nice surprise to when he looked up from serving a customer to see McGarrett walking towards a table with none other then Catherine Rollins, his sister Mary and the little kahuna, as he affectionally called the littlest McGarrett.

He headed out of the truck to where they had taken a seat and smiled as he walked closer to them, "Welcome back my bruddah", His hand held out for Steve to take, shaking hands and as Steve was standing, pulling him into a hug with his other arm. Once he had pulled back, he looked at the man that he once regarded as a simple haole and was now family to him and his cousin Flippa. "I'm sorry to hear about your Mom, If there is anything I can do, you just let me know and if you want to hold the wake at Steve's, it's all yours". Steve smiled and nodded, feeling appreciative of those words, "Thanks Kamakona, I really appreciate that my man".

This is why he stayed and had no intensions of leaving the island again, it was the people in his life that made him feel that he had a family. He knew that family wasn't always just the blood relatives in your life, it was the people that made you feel at home, the ones that made you feel safe, loved and protected. He knew he could always count on them and they could always count on him as well. Sitting down next to Catherine, he smiled wide when Joanie went running into Kamakona's arms and he lifted the little girl in the air.

"And how is my very best customer doing, I've missed seeing you around here?", Joan giggled at that question and smiled brightly, "I've missed you too Uncle Kammie, and I'm doing better now that Mommy said we can move here permanently". Her excited little voice told Kamakona she was wanting to spill that news all morning to anyone she came into contact with. "That's awesome little kahuna, give me a high five". She gave him a high five, kissed his cheek and then he put her down to go sit with her mother. "I've missed seeing you too Mary, I'm sorry about your Mom.. You know I'm here for you and the little kahuna". Mary smiled softly, standing up to give him a hug, "Thanks Kammie, and we know, and we love you for it so much, I've missed seeing you too".

It made Mary feel so much at home already to see that Steve's Ohana already considered her to be Ohana as well. It was why she was at peace with making this decision about leaving Los Angeles and moving back to Hawaii. She knew she would miss her friends back in Los Angeles, however she knew she would make new friends here as well and she already had family here who loved her and her daughter. Watching on, Steve could sense she had found peace, and that first year when he came home, it was tough to transition back to living stateside and not being at sea or overseas somewhere fighting for his country, but it was Danny, Kono and Chin that helped him become at peace with the idea of being here permanently.

"I was wondering when I was going to see you again Sistah", he exclaimed as a way of starting a conversation with the beautiful brunette sitting next to Steve, "Awww Kammie, get over here and give me a hug", She stood up and walked the short distance to where he was and hugged him tight, "I missed seeing your smiling face around here as well". Pulling away, she smiled brightly at those words, "Well get used to seeing me around more often because I'm also here to stay". He was ecstatic to hear those words, he knew the big kuhna was lonely without his lady around and though he knew he had dated after Catherine, those women would never live up to Catherine who was just so much like Steve and understood him in a way no one else could.

"That's wonderful to hear Sistah, I don't often do this, but for today, lunch is on the house, Nahele will be over in a moment to take your order". That was big news for Kamakona to hear, Mary, Joan and Catherine all moving back to the island, how could he not take the time to celebrate that news, even in the midst of a tragedy. "Wow, Kamakona, I'm touched brother", Steve spoke up and smiled hearing that he was planning on giving them their meals for free, "I hope you know we do plan on getting some to go for the rest of the five-o team". The business entrepreneur smirked and chuckled, "Don't push your luck McGarrett". He looked over at the crowded truck, "I should get over there to help Flippa, I'll tell Nahele to come over and get your orders so you don't have to wait in line".

Once he was gone, Steve smiled softly as Joan opened her colouring book and Mary and Catherine began talking about what they both wanted to eat from the shrimp truck. Neither of them had eaten from here in a while, and there was always so many amazing meals on the menu to eat. Steve knew exactly what he was going to have, so he sat in silence watching what was going on around him, the breeze of the ocean picking up and making the girls hair wave around in the wind, and he knew he was right where he belonged.

**Author's Notes**

Beginning to feel like a broken record here but again, I just want to thank you all for sticking by my story and continuing to support my writing. I have never gotten this far in a fan fiction before getting a bit of writers block and unfocused so I am really grateful to you all for reading and being patient with me whilst I find a way to balance full time work with my personal life and my hobby of writing. I am really proud of how this story is coming along and I hope you are all still enjoying it as well. I really hope you enjoyed me bringing in Kamakona as well. I have tried my best to make all the characters sound how they on the show and act as they do on the show so I hope I have done justice to one of my favourite minor characters.

P.S: The next chapter has a bigger author note as well.

**SteveMcGarrettLover**

No, it wasn't your own error, not sure why it did that. Thank you, I am glad you like that. Where my Mum works at the library, they have a program where kids who don't have a lot of self confidence can read out loud to a dog so they can practise public speaking to gain confidence so I wanted to add that in as well. I haven't read it before but I have read it today to get a feel of what you are talking about and that is pretty much spot on for how I'd most likely want to approach it for my own smut. I'd prefer to avoid using incorrect terminology for certain things (I think you probably get an idea of what I mean without me using examples haha) so I do think I have a frame of reference to work out a smut chapter in my own words. I like being detailed in the actual sex act but also love to bring their own thoughts and feelings into it as well. I really appreciate your words, it means a lot to me. I've recently been bullied by an ex friend online who didn't tell me directly but mentioned to someone else in a public comment on social media that I wasn't a very good writer even though she had told me before I was one of the best writers she had role played with (Just her being vindictive I guess in saying to someone else I wasn't) so I really appreciate you saying my chapters are well written, it truly means the world to me. Whenever I do feel insecure about my writing, I think of all the support I have gotten here and on the other fan fiction site I post my stories on.


	29. Chapter 29

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 29**

After they had lunch, spent time with Nahele whom Kamakona had kindly let go on a break, and then ordered enough food for the rest of the five-o team back at the office, they were off. It had been nice to sit, relax and enjoy a meal for once. There had been plenty of times over the last eight or so weeks where Steve had eaten very quickly and not a lot because he needed to be on the ball and keep going without having the luxury of being able to stop, slow down and relax. He was either sleeping or working on getting intel and even when he was sleeping, he wasn't sleeping anywhere near as much as he did when he was at home so this was nice and he was looking forward to more moments like this.

Security all stopped to say hello to the four of them, all of them knowing what happened and stopping to give their condolences to Steve, Mary and Joan and then they were heading upstairs to the five-o headquarters. Lou's voice could be heard first, followed by Quinn's as they talked about a case they were currently working on. "That better be lunch you got there in that bag brother, we are starving", was his first words before he even turned to look at them. Steve laughed as he walked in to the room and put the food down at the table with chairs just behind the surface table, "It most certainly is lunch big fella, have at it".

Quinn nodded her head in approval and smiled, "He brings us lunch, I am impressed". As she was still relatively new, she wasn't aware that this gesture was not something that happened all the time, "Yeah don't get too impressed, he usually doesn't like being the one to shout people anything at all", Danny had heard the noise and peeked his head out of his office, and upon seeing Steve, Mary, Joan and Catherine had come out of his office with his son right behind him, Joan running up to Charlie and chatting to them like they were already best of friends.

Having heard the sudden noise in the office, the other members of five-o, Tani, Junior and Adam all came out of their own offices having been doing their part on the current investigation, "Well hello there to you all", came Tani's chipper voice, "I'm sorry if it looks like I am ignoring you, but I heard food mentioned and I for one am starved, so if you will all excuse me, I'm going to grab some lunch before it all gets eaten". She rushed past them, Junior shaking his head in amusement. Mary took that moment to address Junior. "Junior, thanks again for giving up your room at Steve's, Joan and I really appreciate it".

Junior blushed softly, bowing his head before looking back up at her, "You are welcome. It's still your home first and foremost so it's my pleasure to let you two crash there, I've been meaning to look for a place to stay, just haven't found the time to go look at anything good yet". As they were talking, Joan had been over in the corner talking to Charlie and all of a sudden she took him by the hand and gently pulled him into the direction of her Aunt Catherine. "Aunt Cath, there is someone I want you to meet, Charlie, this is my Aunt Cath, Uncle Steve's girlfriend, Aunt Cath, this is my friend Charlie".

Charlie was still a little nervous when it came to meeting new people, but he was doing much better lately and though he hadn't meet Catherine yet, he had heard a lot about her from his Dad, his Uncle Steve, his sister Grace and even his Mom Rachel. "It's nice to meet you Ma'am", he had been brought up to greet people he didn't know by Mr or Mrs and their surname or Sir or Ma'am if he didn't know their names or feel comfortable calling them by their first name. Catherine smiled softly looking at Danny who stepped forward and put his hand on Charlie's shoulder reassuringly. Catherine had always been good with kids and especially with Grace when she was younger knelt down to his level and smiled softly. "It's lovely to meet you Charlie. Did you know that I met your sister when she was about your age and she calls Aunt Cath as well, so you are more then welcome to call me Aunt Cath too".

Danny and Catherine smiled at each other and then she turned her attention back to Charlie when he brightened a little and stood a little straighter, "Really? I can call you Aunt Cath?" He had heard so many stories about Aunt Cath from his sister and he was in awe of her, how much she was like his Uncle Steve. She nodded her head, smiling wider, "Of course you can, I'd really love that". The very fact that his Uncle Steve's girlfriend was okay with him calling her Aunt Cath warmed his heart, and he before she knew what was happening, he had thrown himself in her arms, Cath catching him and wrapping her arms around him and hugging the boy tight while the rest of them watched on with big smiles on their faces. Grace had always adored this woman and even his mother spoke highly of Lieutenant Rollins so it meant a lot to him that she liked him, and it meant a lot to her that he liked her as well.

Once he pulled back, she smiled and leaned in, kissing his cheek, "I can see where you get your good looks from, you look so much like your Dad, you are gonna break some hearts when you are older". Charlie blushed a little, "Thank you Aunt Cath", he leaned in and whispered, "I can see why Uncle Steve loves you so much too", this time it was Catherine's turn to blush. "You also get your charm from your Dad as well I see.. You hungry, we brought some lunch for you.. We know you are allergic to shrimp, so we got you McDonalds instead, how does that sound?" Charlie nodded happily, and Danny patted his shoulder with his fingers to prompt him to say thank you, "What do you say to Uncle Steve and Aunt Cath, and Aunt Mary". He gave them all a hug and said thank you while Steve brought his and Joan's McDonalds into Danny's office. "Why don't you sit in here, have your lunch and you Joanie can have your apple pie and then I'll show you my office".

He was hoping that perhaps once the rest of the team had lunch, Mary could take Joan and Charlie to the park and have a play while Steve and Catherine got caught up in the current case and maybe did some paperwork, Joan and Charlie had a few play dates before when Mary and Joan had come over for a visit and it was nice to see them getting along, he thought of Sara, Chin and Abby who were out in San Francisco and Kono out on the mainland as well and hoped they could all come home. He did say that they would all be welcome back to five-o should they ever decide to come home. He knew Adam would love it if Kono came home. The two had separated however it was with an agreement that they would take some time and see if some space time and distance could ultimately bring them closer again.

As much as he loved his current team and they all worked well together, he couldn't deny he missed Chin, Kono, Sara and even Abby. Chin and Kono were a vital part of five-o's success, and It would be nice to see the four of them and be able to introduce her, and Chin to the newcomers of five-o. It was a pipe dream he knew, walking over to the table to talk to his family as they ate, he knew one day they would be home where they belonged, just like his sister, niece and girlfriend.

**Author's Notes**

Beginning to feel like a broken record here but again, I just want to thank you all for sticking by my story and continuing to support my writing. I have never gotten this far in a fan fiction before getting a bit of writers block and unfocused so I am really grateful to you all for reading and being patient with me whilst I find a way to balance full time work with my personal life and my hobby of writing. I am really proud of how this story is coming along and I hope you are all still enjoying it as well.

I'm hoping by now after this chapter, you might have an idea of where else I am heading with this story of essentially coming home. I know we will never get Grace and Daniel back on the show to play Kono and Chin, but I'd love my story to include them and I'm working to get them back to Hawaii as well. Let me all know what you think of Abby Dunn and if you think she is a good fit for Chin and Sara because I personally loved her but I do like your opinions and what your thoughts are on who you feel is best suited. I loved Malia Waincroft but I'm not gonna bring her back from the dead because it affected Chin a lot and that whole tragedy helped shape him into the man he is now.

I'm also using Adam's storyline in the story where he and Kono separated but that it wasn't an it's over for good thing, it was more of a let me do this thing on the mainland and feel I am doing what I need to do for myself and these girls and you go do your thing on the island and we can see how we feel later on. I will bring the three of them, possibly Abby too back to the Island, I have an idea, but I'll stay mom on that till it's posted but please I'd love to hear your thoughts on Abby as a character and as a couple with Chin, because if you guys have a better idea who to put him with or don't like that ship much, or want him to return with just him and Sara as a single man, let me know. Your opinions and thoughts mean so much to me. We are all fans of the show and this story is for you guys as much as it is for myself. Much love to you all, Mahalo for all the love so far xx


	30. Chapter 30

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 30**

Part of the tour included rendition, it was lucky that no one was in rendition today because Mary and Joan had wanted to go downstairs to the basement level to see what it looked like. Steve even let Mary and Joan sit on the sit where criminals usually sit and chuckled softly as Catherine took a photo of the two of them. "I have no idea what you two are going to do with that photo and I'm not sure I want to know either".

As Mary got up off the chair, she too laughed, adjusting Joan on her hip, "I think Joanie wants to show her friends when we get back to L.A to to move our life over her that she was in a real rendition room where her badass Uncles and Aunts interrogate bad guys".

Joanie nodded her head enthusiastically, "Mmm hmmm, Mommy's right, I think It will be so rad to show my friends". A lot of her school friends knew that her Uncle was a police officer and a former Navy SEAL, and they always had questions for Joan whenever she had visited her Uncle in Hawaii, though this was the first time she had ever gone down to rendition to look for herself what it was like and she was so excited to tell her friends all about it.

Catherine patted Joan's back softly as they walked out of room and nodded, "I think they will be excited to see your photos too, they will all be so jealous", she added as she gave her niece a high five.

Once they finished in rendition, Mary let her daughter down and she ran into a room where she knew her Uncle Jerry worked in, but was frowning when she got to the door way. It was empty and had none of Uncle Jerry's things in it. "Where's Uncle Jerry's things?", she asked, turning to look at her Uncle with a confused face. Steve looked at both Mary and Catherine, he had talked to them about how Jerry had been shot the year before and had decided to take a break from the job to pursue other things.

He got down on his knee in front of Joan and began to speak softly, "Joanie, Your Uncle Jerry decided to take a little time off from crime fighting. He has some other things he wants to do and we didn't want to keep him from doing what he truly felt was right for him". His hands were on her shoulder and he never let his eyes deviate from hers, he wanted to be honest with her without going through the emotions of saying why he had made that decision because he didn't want to scare her. He knew she had already been scared when he nearly died during that moment he was shot and had to have a liver transplant.

She was smart, and she understood and was fine with that answer, though she had more question, "He will be here for the funeral though right?", this time it was Catherine to kneel down beside Steve and she nodded her head, "I've already spoken with Uncle Jerry on the phone and he is on his way back to the island to be here for it, plus he wanted to be able to see you again". She had missed her Uncle Jerry and she leaned in and hugged Catherine and then pulled away, doing the same with her Uncle.

Once she had pulled away from Steve, she began to skip away to the elevator that would take them back upstairs. "She is something else isn't she", Steve whispered to Catherine as they helped each other up from the ground. "Let's go bro, Joan still wants to see your office, even though she has been in there many times before, she wants a photo on your chair though I do think we might need to prop her up on something so we can see her over the desk". Mary chuckled as she began to follow Joan, Catherine and Steve behind her.

Before they moved on, Steve stopped and turned to face Catherine, and smiled at her, his hands resting on her shoulders, "One day Cath, I promise we are going to have a family of our own and a daughter or son, maybe even both", he chuckled, his eyes tearing up, lump forming in his throat. "It's always been you and it will always be you, I think that's why I've never been able to settle down before with anyone else". It was freaky in a way to Catherine but at the same time, felt right that both of them had that thought watching their little niece, hoping one day it would be their daughter or son running and skipping their way through the five-o HQ.

She smiled softly, leaning in to him and kissed his lips gently, "I'm certain it's why I have never let myself settle down because I knew that I always belonged right here with you.. I can't wait for our journey to start. Once we say our final farewells to Doris, we can truly begin to heal from everything and start anew and I can't wait to be apart of the next chapter of your life". He returned the kiss and let his nose rub against hers, "Our chapter Lieutenant, we'll closing one book and opening another together and I'm excited".

This had been a long time coming for the two of them and it took his father figure being killed, his niece almost dying in an accident and then his mother being killed to bring them back together. Ever since Joe had been killed, and Catherine stepped up and stood by him, they had begun to get closer and each tragic event that had happened since, they had been brought closer. Catherine hadn't hesitated in coming back to Hawaii when Gracie was in that car accident and stayed longer than she should have. He knew she got reprimanded for that but she had told him it was all worth it.

Now that his mother had been killed, it really felt like the time to start to settle down. He wasn't getting any younger and he really did want to experience being married and having a family, screw what Greer thought of him, a man that just wasn't a man to commit to a relationship. He had always known the thing with Greer wasn't permanent because even then, Catherine had always been at the centre of his heart and mind. Smiling and chuckling when he heard Joanie's voice telling them to hurry, the two of them kissed once more and then hand in hand, walked down the hallway to meet Mary and Joan just as the elevator doors opened.

**Author Notes**

I really hope you guys enjoy these next two chapters, Chapter 31 one is a bit angsty and sad. I wasn't intending to go this way when I began writing it, but I hope you guys enjoy it. It shows the grieving process even though they are all moving forward slowly one day at a time. Thanks to all my followers and supporters for appreciating my work. It means so much. I'll be updating Right here waiting either most likely over the weekend at some point.

**SteveMcGarrettLover**

Thank you so much. I am glad you liked the chapter with Kamekona in it, I tried to think about what he would say and then hear his voice saying the words I wanted him to say to try to help understand his voice. It really means so much that you say that, your reviews do make the difference in helping me stay motivated to keep a story going. It's all good. She isn't on fan fiction. I doubt she knows I even post stories on here. It was just a role play thing on a site called mewe. She isn't even worth the energy honestly but I appreciate you wanting to stick up for me xx Means a lot you consider me a friend.


	31. Chapter 31

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 31**

Heading back up to the five-o offices, everyone had scattered to do their own things. Danny was back in his office with Charlie finishing off his lunch, Quinn and Tani were out getting a new lead on their current case, Junior had an urgent phone call from his mother, Adam had to go see Duke about a case down at HPD and Lou was visiting Eric in the crime lab to check on some evidence they were testing.

"It's interesting to see the office when it's just as quiet as when it's bustling and busy with everyone here isn't it sweetheart", Mary could sense the very slight disappointment Joan had that everyone had rushed off before they could say goodbye or tell them the good news about how they were moving back to the Island, her hand on Mary's shoulder and her daughter nodded, "I guess it is".

After giving Joan and Mary a tour of his office and some photos that she could take back to L.A and show her friends, he asked Mary and Catherine if he could have a moment with his niece. He sat her up on his desk and sat down on his chair, "You okay munchkin?", his hands were on the desk either side of her as she kicked her feet a bit, looking down. "I bet you feel a bit sad that everyone left without saying goodbye aren't you?"

Shrugging her shoulders, she looked close to tears but trying her hardest to stay strong in front of her Uncle. It wasn't just about her family leaving without saying goodbye. She understood that sometimes they got a call saying they were needed urgently and couldn't take the time to say goodbyes, but with her Grandma dying, and leaving her without saying goodbye, it just overwhelmed her. She took a breath and it all came rushing out, "It's not fair Uncle Steve".

Looking into her eyes, he moved his chair closer to the desk and wiped away her tears, and moved her hair from her face, "What's not fair Joanie?", he was confused, though at the same time, he did wonder if it this was more than just everyone leaving the office without saying goodbye to her. "I didn't get to see Grandma again.. She was going to come visit on my birthday and take me somewhere fun for the day, just me and her, grandma, granddaughter day she called it". Joanie sniffled, and more tears fell from her eyes. "I never got to say goodbye".

With that she burst into tears, nearly launching herself into her Uncle's arms when he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her onto his lap, "I know Joanie, it's not fair at all sweetheart. I know you loved your grandma and I know she loved you very much too". It was hard for Steve to see his niece upset like this and over something that was real and painful as well, not some trivial little thing.

His own eyes misted over and when he felt her little arms cling around his neck, he held onto her a little tighter. He was in his own little world with Joan that he didn't realise that Mary and Catherine and now even Danny were watching through the glass panelling of the windows. His heart broke for Joan for not being able to really know her grandmother and his heart broke for himself. He didn't have any living parents now and that was a lot to deal with, even for a grown man.

Despite his differences with her, she was a wonderful mother when he and Mary were growing up, before she took off on them. He did have a lot of childhood memories that he could cherish and still look upon with fondness and he wanted Joan to have been able to know that Doris McGarrett, the one that spent time with her grandchild and did fun things with her.

Bringing her chin up to look into his eyes, he continued, "This is what the funeral is for though, so we can all say goodbye to her and give her a proper send off, and then we will have her buried with Grandpa where they can be together again, and grandma can catch grandpa up on everything and let him know about his beautiful and sweet granddaughter named Joanie whom was named after her grandfather".

That seemed to bring her back to life a little. She smiled sadly and nodded, Steve not letting go of her reached over with one hand to get the Kleenex to wipe her nose and eyes, sniffling a little she whispered softly, "yeah, and I think that your grandfather will love you so much sweetheart, just as much as Mommy loves you, and I love you and everyone else loves you". She hugged him again and kissed his cheek, "Can we go see great grandpa Steve". Steve was surprised at that request. He knew she knew about his and Mary's grandfather but it just proved again and again how amazing this little girl was.

"How about one day next week, we'll go visit him, I am sure he will love hearing from his great granddaughter". Just as they hugged once more, Mary opened the door to Steves office and smiled softly, having seen but not heard, "Everything okay in here pumpkin?" She turned to face her mother and smiled, Steve giving a thumbs up to his sister, "Everything is fine isn't it Joan". Though he said that, his look did say that he would go into more detail later when Joan wasn't around. Joan nodded and smiled as she got down from her Uncle's lap and began to walk towards her mother, "All good Mommy, Uncle Steve said he'd take me to visit great grandpa Steve next week".

She smiled as she took her daughter's hand and nodded her thanks to Steve for knowing exactly how to talk to his niece and for putting that smile back on her face. "Awesome, I like that idea baby girl.. Hey I was thinking, Uncle Danny has to stay at work for a little while longer and I think Charlie is getting bored.. How bout we invite him to come with us to get some shaved ice and then maybe head to the park for a little while and then we can drop him at home later on". She smiled and ran out of the room to go ask Charlie and Uncle Danny if he could come with them for some shaved ice.

"I know you will explain all of that later, but thank you big brother… Seeing you like that with Joanie, I know you will make an amazing father one day". He nodded back and smiled, Catherine coming in through the open door that Mary held open still, "Thanks little Sis, you already make an amazing mother.. you have come a long way and I'm proud of you". He got up and walked over to the door and hugged his sister, Catherine having already sat down at one of the chairs opposite his side of the desk, and she thanked her lucky stars that things seemed to be working out for them so far this time, there truly was no other place that Catherine wanted to be.

**Author Notes**

I really hope you guys enjoy these next two chapters, Chapter 31 one is a bit angsty and sad. I wasn't intending to go this way when I began writing it, but I hope you guys enjoy it. It shows the grieving process even though they are all moving forward slowly one day at a time. These two chapters came along really quickly. When I start to write, it all just flows and that's in part thanks to you all for giving me support by way of reviews or even just follows and favourites and knowing or at least hoping you are all still reading. Thanks to all my followers and supporters for appreciating my work. It means so much. I'll be updating Right here waiting either most likely over the weekend at some point.

**SteveMcGarrettLover**

I am really happy you liked how I had Catherine and Charlie interact. I want her to just be family again, no awkwardness or anything and I think she has always been good with kids as well. She was really good with Grace when she was younger as well. Awesome, I am glad you love Abby, I really adored her right from the moment we first saw her and even learning why she was really there, I still loved her because you could sense she was uncomfortable with it. I'd even maybe like to bring back Lori at some point, maybe.. that's just a maybe right now.. but who knows. I don't like where they are going with Adam's storyline, and he has been loyal to Steve and five-o ever since he saved Kono's life that time. He is a good man and I hope he does right by his Ohana.


	32. Chapter 32

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 32**

The two of them worked tirelessly throughout the afternoon to get some of the mountains of paperwork done that needed to be finalised. As Commander and team leader of five-o, Steve had to deal with a lot of paperwork and sign a lot of documents. It was also his job to do performance reviews on the rest of the team and deal with the pay slips each week.

Danny was the second in charge when Steve wasn't available and so Danny had to take a lot of it on in the last several weeks since he had been in Mexico, though since being home, he knew it wasn't fair on Danny to make him deal with it all so he wanted to get as much done himself as he could.

"I appreciate you helping me with the paperwork Cath, I know you hate it as much as I do", he looked up from the desk to where Catherine was sitting next to him and smiled as he spoke. "You know I'd do anything to help you Steve, and I know you. You don't want to be sitting here when you are officially back on duty doing paperwork all day, you want to be out there with everyone else doing what you do best, so anything I can help to get it finished quicker, I am happy to do".

She really did know him so well, and knew that he wanted to be out there in the thick of it all. All of his adult life, he had been working in some kind of law enforcement, with the Navy and now with the five-o taskforce. He sometimes felt guilty that he got this job with no real police credentials, and all he had was his skills as a Navy SEAL to back him up, but over the years, he had done training with HPD, sat in on some classes with the academy and learnt the finer skills of investigating.

Knowing his father and his grandfather was looking down on him, he knew they would be proud of him, of the man he turned out to be. His father never wanted him to become a cop, he never wanted that life for his son, but after joining the Navy, John McGarrett had always known that one day, his son would follow in his own footsteps.

It was nearly five oclock before they headed home for the day, some of the team had come back in and out of the offices but once it hit that magic five on the clock, he was ready to go leave this behind him for the day and head home. "I think we got this all done, there is only a few more things to handle and that is doing Tani, Junior and Quinn's performance assessments which are coming up, but I'll do those when I'm in the office officially".

Nodding her head and stifling a yawn, she nodded her head, "I think that is a good idea", she closed the folder on the paperwork she had been looking over and put it back on his desk in the finalised stack. "If you want my thoughts, Tani and Junior are really at home here now. Both of them are doing well and from what I have seen even the last couple of days, they are more then capable, and Quinn.. Well I love her already, she seems to be fitting in quite well here, you always seem to pick people who compliment you but also aren't afraid of a challenge".

It was always nice to hear Catherine's thoughts and opinions about anything and he really appreciated her candor, "Thank you, I am really glad you like them and approve, I was actually meaning to do this a little earlier, but I didn't have a spare". He opened his desk drawer and pulled out Catherine's five-o taskforce badge and ID for her tactical vest. "I know we are a little low on spaces here at the moment, but we can always work in here together, least till the governor signs off on expanding the room, I want you back here Cath".

He took a breath and held up his hand, knowing she was going to say something, "and before you say yes or no, it's not a handout, and I know you say it's my thing, but I hope now you plan on staying here more permanently that five-0 can become your thing as well". He loved that he had so many people in his corner and on his team, the team that he had assembled, he trusted each and every single one of them.

The Governor gave five-o as much support and as big a budget as she could to be able to support them as she believed in what they were doing, and so when it came to hiring, he was always happy to hire those that he trusted could do the job. He leant over and put the badge in her hand, looking into her eyes, watching her as her eyes misted over. When she needed an avenue to move on after Billy Harrington's death, this was it and he knew she wouldn't want to stay unemployed for long.

He loved the fact she wanted to still have a career and hopefully juggle family time with him once they settled down into life as a couple again and one day a family with children to raise together. "I don't know what to say Steve", she whispered those words, "All you need to say is yes Cath". His smile was reassuring and when she looked into his eyes, she could see only truth in his words. "

She nodded her head as she stood up and came over and walked to him, moving to sit on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck, "There's nowhere else I'd rather work Steve then with five-o". She could have gotten a job with HPD or even worked as a civilian contractor to the Navy but when it all came down to it, she wanted to be at five-o.

He smiled that smile she loved so much and moved in closer, closing his eyes as he kissed her lips gently. "I'm glad to hear you say that, now how about we get out of here and go grab some dinner, Mary called while you were in the bathroom, she has been invited by Danny, Rachel and Charlie for her and Joan to stay there tonight, I think it's Danny's way of giving us some time alone".

She giggled softly, letting a soft blush fall on her cheeks as she whispered back against his lips, "He is a good friend, and I think having the house to ourselves would be a wonderful idea Sailor". To see the smile on his face, it made her feel that Steve would be able to get through this, it would be hard and while they had moments of happiness, she also knew there would be moments of sadness as well. He had lost so much, his best friend Freddie, his father, Billy, Joe, and now his mother and she was just glad that she was here now for him to show him that he could finally have his happy ever after.

**Author's Notes**

I have had so much inspiration today that I managed to turn two chapters into three. I also was able to use an idea I had a while back as well. I want to make this a romance but I also want to pay respect to the fact it does still need to be somber at moments because of his mother's death, so I am happy that the last chapter was really well received. Three chapters also allow me to get back on an even number of chapters. I have an aversion with odd numbers for some reason so when I am doing two chapters, I'd rather the second chapter I write ends on an even number. We are also getting a little closer to a chapter where Catherine and Steve can have grown up alone time as well.

**SteveMcGarrettLover: **

I am really happy you liked the last two chapters, I have always wondered how the rendition room would feel to a family member to visit rendition, and I love the idea from a Childs perspective. Aww thank you so much xx


	33. Chapter 33

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 33**

There was one thing that the two of them hadn't done very often and that was going out to eat. They usually made reservations, however they always seemed to miss them, and he remembered that one day when they went to rainbow for breakfast and how she was expecting something a little more so now he wanted to make sure she knew how much she meant to him by romancing her and doing the date night thing.

They never really did those types of things, but yet they were never your typical couple and always did things their own way, but now he wanted to prove to her that she could be happy and settled staying here and that she never needed to go off to another country to find herself. "So I thought we'd go somewhere different than Kamekona's tonight, and before you say a word, what you are wearing is perfect".

They were walking hand in hand after they had just left the palace, Catherine leaning into him and smiling softly, "I'd like that, how bout Side Street?", She knew that both her and Steve weren't the kind of people to go to some really fancy expensive restaurant and Side Street was a place they used to go all the time when she was living in Hawaii. "Sounds good to me, I might have already made reservations for us, so I was hoping you would say there".

Catherine's stingray was parked in the car park, Steve had graciously kept it at his house in his garage when she left to to overseas. It was her grandfather's car and she had it imported from the mainland to the island when got her duties at Pearl Harbour. "This must be Danny and Mary's doing I assume?", she asked as her eyes welled up at seeing her car there. "I have no idea what you are talking about", he responded with a smirk and a chuckle. He might have asked Mary and Danny to organise this as they were continuing with paperwork.

She leaned in and kissed him softly, "I'll have to text them later, and thank them, and I should thank you for keeping it all this time". He handed her the keys and smiled, kissing her back, "You are welcome, I knew you would want it to be kept safe and sound while you were away". Her eyes went wide and she smirked as he handed the keys to her, "Wow and he is letting me drive as well". He laughed at her words and nodded as they walked over to the car, and she unlocked it, "Well I couldn't very well drive it myself knowing you haven't driven it in a long time".

They both opened the car doors and got in, Catherine in the drivers seat and Steve in the passenger seat, "Awe how sweet", was her response as they both closed the doors and Catherine started up the car. She loved this car, and it meant a lot to her that Steve had kept it in good working condition, it had to be hard for him, seeing it in his garage every day and then having to drive it occasionally for inspections or maintenance.

It made her nearly teary again to see this kind of commitment to her even though she wasn't there, the very fact that he was willing to do this for her, it made her heart skip a beat. This was the Steve she knew and loved, neither of them got jealous or possessive and while she knew deep down that Steve had reservations about her working with Billy that he would never admit, he trusted her and that had been all she had ever needed from him.

She turned to face him for a moment, her serious face on, "I really appreciate you keeping this for me and taking the time to keep it in good condition, it means a lot to me Steve". He took her hand and squeezed it gently, "I know how much this car means to you, it was your grandfather's Cath, and I wasn't going to get rid of it or not look after it for you". Smiling as she put the car into reverse, "and that is one of the many reasons why I love you so much".

There was never any doubt in his mind that Catherine still loved him, but he did love hearing those words from her, it made him feel safe and settled. "I love you too, I hope you know I never stopped Cath". As she reversed and then put the car in gear, she smiled, "I know, and I never stopped loving you either Steve". The promise she made him before she left, she would always love him, that remained true, and that was why she never was able to commit to anyone else beyond casual dating.

**Author's Notes**

I have had so much inspiration today that I managed to turn two chapters into three. I also was able to use an idea I had a while back as well. I want to make this a romance but I also want to pay respect to the fact it does still need to be somber at moments because of his mother's death, so I am happy that the last chapter was really well received. Three chapters also allow me to get back on an even number of chapters. I have an aversion with odd numbers for some reason so when I am doing two chapters, I'd rather the second chapter I write ends on an even number. We are also getting a little closer to a chapter where Catherine and Steve can have grown up alone time as well.

**SteveMcGarrettLover: **

I am really happy to hear you say that, I was tearing up writing it so I was hoping it would come across really well written. It is staying strong, I am really excited to keep going with these, I might write as much during the week but I'll always get around to posting these up during the weekend once the chapters are completed.


	34. Chapter 34

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 34**

Driving into a parking spot at Side Street, she stopped the car, and pulled the keys out but allowed Steve to still get the door for her even though she was in the drivers seat. Holding her hand out, she smiled as he helped her out of the car and then closed it behind her, and she locked it, putting her keys into her handbag. "And they say chivalry is dead", her words were soft and playful, feeling his hand on the small of her back as he guided her. "I was raised a gentleman I'll have you know".

His own words were just as playful and he smirked, looking over at her. Steve felt like the luckiest man in the world to have Catherine in his life, ever since he met her, he knew it was her, she would always be the great love of his life. Still looking at her like she was the only woman in the world, he didn't even hear at first a woman calling his name from the opposite direction.

Catherine caught the woman's eyes and smiled softly, tapping Steve on the arm, "Look who it is", the woman moved closer to them with a couple of other women. Steve turned to look in the direction Catherine was looking and it was none other than Lynn, his ex and Ellie and another woman he hadn't met before. He gripped Catherine's hip a tiny bit tighter and smiled softly as the women approached them. "Lynn, Ellie, It's been a while, It's nice to see you both".

Lynn had really begun to fall in love with Steve, ever since she saw Catherine's car in the garage and the ring, she always had a feeling she wasn't going to live up to her. She hadn't fully meant to blurt out the proposal but another part of her had to see her reaction. Once Steve left to go on some secret mission with her, she knew then and there that Steve would never love her or look at her the way he did Catherine. After he came back, it didn't feel the same and they scaled down their dating and it became more causal till it just ended.

Deep down, as hard as he tried and as much as he did enjoy the time he spent with Lynn, he never loved her the way she deserved and the way she needed him too. He might have told Catherine that he wasn't going to wait for her anymore but at

Seeing them together did unsettle her a touch, she was jealous of Catherine and for good reason.. "It's good to see you too Steve, and wow, Catherine I didn't know you were back in town.. Are you just here for another case?" The tension was evident and Catherine could sense the jealously dripping from this woman. "It's nice to see you Lynn, and actually, I'm back for good.. I resigned from the CIA and Steve has given me the opportunity to work for five-o again".

It seemed neither woman had kept up to date of his activities as neither seemed to be aware his mother had been killed, wanting to protect her, he pulled her closer, and Ellie tried to lighten up the conversation, "How is your family doing Steve?", She knew his mother was in the CIA and knew that Mary and Joanie lived in L.A as Steve mentioned them to her from time to time. "Mary and Joanie are doing well, they are here right now, they are actually looking at moving here permanently as well.. As for my mother, well.. that is why they are here and one of the reasons why Cath is here.. My mother was killed last week".

Lynn's hands went up to her mouth in shock and Ellie looked in shock as well, Lynn instantly moved her hand to touch Steve's arm and looked up at him, "I am so sorry to hear that Steve, my condolences to you and your family". Ellie nodded her head, she knew the feeling all too well and both his mother and father had been killed by someone, "I'm here if you need me for anything Steve", added Ellie softly. The other woman that was with them had dropped back, she knew this was Lynn's ex and didn't feel entirely comfortable with how Lynn started to touch him when he mentioned his mother.

"Thank you both, it means a lot to me" He gently moved out of Lynn's reach, Catherine looked at her watch and made the perfect excuse for them to keep leave, "We should head in Sailor, we don't want to miss our reservations". Steve nodded, turning his gaze back to Catherine, "You're right, we should head in, I'm sorry Lynn, Ellie, we should get going, it was nice to see you both, maybe we can catch up another time". They said their goodbyes to the women and then continued on, hand in hand, "You okay Sailor?", Catherine had to ask once they got out of earshot of the women. He smiled softly and nodded his head. "I'm good Cath… I just hope that wasn't uncomfortable for you".

Walking into the bar, Catherine rested her head on his shoulder for a moment, "I'm fine Steve.. I could sense the jealousness coming from Lynn but you know that you being with her never bothered me, just like you being with Greer never bothered me either.. I trust you and you trust me, that is all either of us needs". She had liked Lynn when she had met her, and so she didn't hate her now or even dislike her… She was just a woman from Steve's past to her, even if it was in between when she and Steve had been together.

"That's all I need to hear Cath", he smiled and leaned in to kiss her before they went to stand at the front where they greeted you and took you to your table. Their relationship and even their friendship was a special one, one that not many people could say had. They had a few hiccups here and there and ups and downs like all people did, but all they wanted to see was the other's happiness and it meant the world to Steve that he was the one making Catherine happy.

Meanwhile, out on the streets, Lynn was pouting, "I can't believe it, She is flaky and has bailed on him so many times before, why is he believing her now". Ellie, whom had set the two up when it seemed Catherine wasn't coming back sighed softly, "He obviously loves her Lynn and it's his choice if he wants to give her another chance". The other woman whom had known Catherine by reputation as she had also been in the Navy spoke up, "I've only ever heard good things about Lieutenant Rollins and from the look on her face this evening, she looked serious when she said she was staying and taking a job back at five-o.. Now let's let this go and enjoy the rest of our night". Begrudgingly, she let them tug her away from the pub that Steve and Catherine had walked into, though not without a second glance back towards to where she last saw them.

**Author's Notes**

I have had so much inspiration today that I managed to turn two chapters into three. I also was able to use an idea I had a while back as well. I want to make this a romance but I also want to pay respect to the fact it does still need to be somber at moments because of his mother's death, so I am happy that the last chapter was really well received. Three chapters also allow me to get back on an even number of chapters. I have an aversion with odd numbers for some reason so when I am doing two chapters, I'd rather the second chapter I write ends on an even number. We are also getting a little closer to a chapter where Catherine and Steve can have grown up alone time as well.

I also hope you like the fact I brought Lynn and Ellie in to the mix a little. I don't know if I will use Lynn again or not but I felt it needed to be put in there. A lot of the time, the writers add these characters like Lynn, Ellie and even Melissa/Amber and all of a sudden they are dropped with no real reason why. I understand the actor/actress might not be available but they should at least broach it in the story as to why these characters are no longer seen from or heard from again so I wanted to add in that Lynn and Ellie still lived on the island and there could be reason for them to bump into each other. I hope I portrayed her okay as well, I did think she was a bit jealous when it came to Catherine and the whole scene where she threw her shoe was it or something at Steve in the valentines episode was cringe worthy to be honest and I think Catherine handled herself well in Lynn's presence in the show and when she was talking to Steve about it later on, then with her not being jealous over Greer, I sense that Catherine just doesn't get jealous because she knows what She and Steve have is special.


	35. Chapter 35

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 35**

To say that finally getting to have a dinner together, just the two of them was amazing was an understatement. It had been a really lovely evening, and even running into Lynn hadn't done anything to dampen the evening at all. Steve loved the fact that Catherine wasn't the jealous type, that he could have other women in his past and she didn't blink an eye.

It was the jealous types he had learnt to be wary of, and those were the ones that he didn't have the time nor day for. Greer was one he sensed had control issues and jealously issues, it's why he never bothered pursuing anything more with her, and Lynn had been the same when she found the ring he had brought for Catherine.

That ring, he still had hidden, of course he had to hide it somewhere else now seeing as she was moving back home with him, but he decided to keep the same ring to propose to her when they were ready to take that step. He brought it knowing it was the kind of ring she would love and keeping it all this time gave him the hope he needed that one day they would be brought back together again.

He never envisioned it would be the deaths of two of the most important people to bring them back, but he was glad they were here now in a place where they could lay the ground work to become happy as a couple and as a family. The only issue he was worried about was Lynn and if she would try anything, though he knew as jealous as she was, she wasn't in the league of someone like Greer, but he did want to speak to Ellie and make sure she wasn't going to cause any issues now she knew Steve and Cath were back together.

They were on their way back home now, their hands linked together and for the first time in a long time, Steve felt at peace, and relaxed. He was still deeply upset over losing his mother and even losing Joe about a year before, however this felt right. Ever since he first met Catherine, he had known in his heart that she was the one for him, the only one he could envision married to and having a family with.

It was the simple things with them, they didn't need to speak to know what the other person was saying, having lived a long distance relationship in and off for many years, they both just wanted to settle in one place. Steve never believed he would have lived on the island now for ten years, when he first came back, it wasn't to stay and yet the island he grew up on became his home once more.

Pulling into the driveway, he smiled at a memory from long ago. It was when he waited up for Catherine after the first day working with Billy Harrington, the way she smiled at him and hugged him when she came up to the porch.. It all made sense then and it all made sense now. Even knowing Billy wanted her back, he was never a threat to them because he trusted Catherine and that was all he needed, and now that Lynn was aware of them being together again, Catherine trusted Steve and that was all she needed as well.

Walking into the house, she smiled at the quietness, it had been a long time since the two of them had been alone in this house and she wasn't about to waste any time or not take full advantage of the situation. Mary had taken Eddie over to Danny's so it really was just the two of them and she didn't need to worry about trying to be quiet. She had needs to be taken care of and it all screamed Steve.

"So what do you think, we got the house to ourselves, what would you like to do Commander?", asking coyly, her lips twisting into a smirk, her eyes gazing at his body, his own body aching with a need he didn't realise he needed till now. "I know what I'd like to do Lieutenant". He was still standing by the front door after having locked it for the evening and was smirking back at her, "I'd like to do something we haven't done in a while, something I've missed".

Walking over to her, he picked her up, one arm supporting her back and the other arm under her knees, "I think I can get behind that Sailor", was her response, leaning into him, her arms wrapped around his neck, her lips pressing against his, eyes closing as they kissed passionately and deeply, the only sounds were the sounds of their lips coming together and the soft moans, his legs beginning to move towards the stairs.

Being careful, he walked up the stairs slowly, taking one step at a time till he reached the landing, his lips never moving from hers, and he continued onto the bedroom that he had made his own. It used to be his parents bedroom and now it was his, his and Catherine's and even just thinking it, it made his heart soar.

This was his family home, the home he came home from the hospital to when he was first born, the one he met his sister in when his mother and father brought Mary home from the hospital and from the moment he came back to the island ten years ago, he envisioned living in that same house with the love of his life and making memories the same way he and his family did when he was young.

Backing her into the bedroom, he smiled loving the fact that they could finally be alone, and be together. Steve had not had sex in a long time, though Mary had her own thoughts, they didn't have sex at the hotel they had been staying at back in Washington, they made out, but not had sex and right now, all he could think about was being inside her again. She had always felt like home to him, no matter where they were, she was home.

**Author Notes. **

Thank you all for your patience, I am sorry it's taken a week to get this uploaded, it's been a busy week for me, but I am so happy to have this next chapter up. It is sincerely you guys that keep me invested in this story and I really love being able to continue it. I love reading and re-reading it as much as you all, It's one of my proudest works to date and it makes me feel so happy to share it all with you. I am excited to see where this story will lead and what's going to happen next. Chapter 37 will skip a day and go to the funeral, I know that much, beyond that, I'm not sure. I don't know if I should finish it at the funeral and then start a new story for the next phase of Steve, Catherine and the rest of the five-o Ohana. I do have plans to bring back old characters from the mainland so just not sure if I should continue that in this story or start a new story, sort of like a follow on or a sequel to this. Let me know if you have any thoughts.

**SteveMcGarrettLover: **

I am so happy you enjoyed chapter 32 and how Catherine saying yes to being a member of five-o again. I just adore having her back on the island and with Steve and the whole team again. I was thinking about her car and what she would have done with it when she left to join the CIA. She took off in a hurry so I don't think she would have had a chance to have it shipped elsewhere and I do imagine being it is an old classic, it was most likely passed down from a family member. It's all good, no worries about the double post.


	36. Chapter 36

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 36**

Catherine had been waiting so long for this moment that she could feel her body tingling, no man could ever compare to Steve and she never wanted any other man either. She did go on some dates when she was with the CIA, after she left Steve back in Hawaii, though they never worked out because they weren't Steve.

Whenever she imagined getting intimate with anyone, it was always only Steve and eventually she stopped dating all together because she didn't want to have a man fall for her when she couldn't fall for him.

He had put her back on her feet, backing her into the bedroom, her arms wrapping around him as they kissed, letting the bedroom door close with the kick of her feet, his arms already tugging at her shirt, their kisses stopping for a moment to lift it over her head, Catherine doing the same with his, though fumbling a bit with the buttons and laughing softly, slowing down her movements for a moment.

She took a moment to gaze into his eyes, breathing him in, her hands working their way up his shoulders to tug his button down shirt off. She wanted to take her time but also wanted to rush as well, it was an exhilarating feeling.

Hands sliding down his chest as her lips reconnected with his, feeling his fingers unclasping her bra strap from behind, moaning softly at his soft touch when he brought his fingers back around to pull her bra off from the straps on her shoulder, her own hands now moving down to his jeans, unbuttoning and then moving the zipper down, hearing him gasping when her fingers brushed against the cloth of his underwear.

Grinning, she whispered softly in his ear at the same time she was tugging his jeans down, "Looks like someone has missed me". Steve chuckled, and moaned when she grazed her finger tips more purposefully against his erection. "Mm, you better believe I have Lieutenant". Now that he had managed to remove her clothing from the waist up, he was focusing on her jeans, unbuttoning and then pulling the zipper down, taking a leaf out of her book and letting his finger trail it's way to her panties, getting a feel of the wetness surrounding her.

Two can play at her game, he thought to himself, "Looks like someone has missed me too", repeating her words and chuckling softly at the soft moan as he pressed his finger in a little deeper through her panties. "I'd be lying if I said I didn't Commander". Getting up on her tip toes, she kissed him deeper, shimmying her hips a little to help get her out of her jeans.

Both just left in their underwear, Steve walked them over to the bed, his lips pressing against hers, gently tossing her onto the bed, then joining her, laying next to her, His fingers and hands mapping out her body, gazing into her eyes, "I love you Catherine". Her breath was shaky when she exhaled and she smiled, her lips moving closer to his, "I love you too Steve". Those words meant so much to them both, it was a lifetime of love and both of them knew that this was the rest of their lives.

Their kisses grew more and more heated and intense, soft moans as they held each other close, making out for a while before Steve moved over her body, his fingers grazing down her body till he got to her panties, sliding them down and off her legs, his fingers then dragging back up her leg to her hip, his breath getting a little heavier when he felt her own hands dragging his briefs down, moaning at the sensation of being freed finally.

"Mmm, I love knowing how excited you get for me Cath", his voice was a whisper, his fingers plunging inside her gently feeling her wetness, his free hand pushing her legs. Her only response was a soft ragged moan with a thrust of her hips, her own breath getting shorter. Once she had pulled his briefs down, her hand went directly to his erection, her thumb moving over the tip, his mouth moving from her lips to her neck, kissing and sucking on her most sensitive area on her neck.

Breathing in deeper, another moan tore from her throat, his fingers plunging in deeper, caressing the quivering bud of her clit with his thumb, "Ohh Steve, please". Her soft whimpers nearly made him come undone already and he wasn't even inside her yet, his own pleasure heightened when her fingers wrapped around him a little tighter as she began to slowly stroke him to full hardness.

He was aching to be inside her, his whole body on fire, his erection throbbing, though right now they had all the time in the world and he wanted to take his time with her. His lips continued to trail down her neck until they reached her breasts, taking his time to appreciate how supple they were and how hard her nipples were. Her hips began to rock, thrusting up to meet his fingers, her own hand starting to move quicker, "Ohh god, Steve".

Her wetness was increasing, slowly beginning to drip down her thighs, his tongue trailing around her hard nipples, before sucking on each one, his fingers thrusting in and out quicker, her legs spreading wider, his lips trailing back up to her throat and then her lips, her eyes opening to meet his, "please Steve… I need you", came her whispered words of pleasure, both of their hands continued to get a work out, his own breath getting more ragged, "Need me where Cath".

Even as he was getting all worked up himself, he could still tease her a little gazing in her eyes with a slight smirk on his face, she couldn't help but shake her head, an amused look on her face, "I think you know where Commander", with that, she stroked him a little harder, using her legs to wrap around his hips, pushing him closer to her, guiding his erection to her warm tight entrance.

Gazing into her eyes, his eyes filled with a hint of amusement, chuckling as his fingers slowly withdrew from inside her, "You were always a little impatient Lieutenant". Steve already knew that Catherine was on birth control pills, he had seen her take them each morning since she first came to the hotel in Washington, and he knew it wasn't for birth control before they got back together, it was something women in the Navy were expected to take and he knew it was just a normal routine for her now.

It meant that he didn't need to worry about a condom which he didn't have a supply of right now anyway since he hadn't had sex in well over a year, the last time he had sex was actually with Catherine when she came back to Hawaii when Grace was in the hospital. The feeling to be inside her was growing and his erection throbbed, feeling heavy against his legs as he took himself in his hand and began to guide himself to her entrance.

Inching inside her slowly, inch by inch, his breathing got more ragged and heavier, it was all so overwhelming to him, she felt so perfect, her tight heat grazing against him as he pushed himself inside, every nerve pulsating, setting his body on fire. His eyes never left Catherine's, watching carefully to make sure she wasn't hurting at all.

The heels of her feet were pressed against his back, her own back arching off the bed to meet him, her heart racing and breathing increasing when she felt him enter her, her arms were sliding down his back, fingertips grazing against his skin, wanting to feel the contact between them.

Once he was all the way in, she leaned up and kissed him again, "You good?", he couldn't help but ask her. Though they did enjoy sex in different ways, including being slightly rough, he always wanted to make sure she was enjoying it and wasn't genuinely hurting her. "Mmm", she nodded her head and smiled, rotating her hips to show him just how good she was, "I'm perfect Sailor, you feel amazing".

Sex always came natural to the two of them, and though it was always pleasurable for both involved, it was not just about the physical pleasure, it was always about the connection and bond they had with each other, it was about feeling safe and loved in each others presence.

Knowing she was good, he smiled, easing his way into it, thrusting slowly in and out, building up a slow rhythm between the two, muscles working hard, bodies starting to sweat, and all of a sudden, before they both realised it, their movements became more urgent, more erratic, a little faster, the only sounds in the room was the sound of the bed slightly squeaking and their moans, calling out each others names as the feeling became more intense and pleasurable.

"Mmm Steve, ohh god, I'm close", she knew she wouldn't last much longer, she had been horny and longing for Steve since she first saw him back at the hotel, full beard and all. His own breathing got heavier as he sucked on her neck gently, he knew he was close as well, and he wasn't going to be able to last for much longer either, "God you feel so good Cath".

Hearing her say she was close, it was a massive turn on, his hips began thrusting a little faster and harder, his groin area beginning to tingle until his whole body begins to tremble and shake, his erection throbbing with intense need to spill his seed inside her, his body starts to tense up, the muscles in his body became more rigid and then hitting that spot, he orgasms hard, spilling his seed, panting for breath, moaning her name over and over in her ear, his arms wrapping around her, their bodies so close that paper couldn't pass through them.

Having felt his orgasm, it just made Catherine come undone, feeling him spill his seed inside her, it made her feel all warm and pleasurable on the inside. Her hips were moving in time with his, her muscles beginning to tighten and this heat that started from her belly button and it moved all the way down to her thighs making her thighs quiver, her body pulsating, throbbing intensely as she felt a need to grip onto him tight, her moans beginning to get louder, and then it happened. It was like a volcanic eruption, her orgasm hit, her whole body shaking and trembling, the floodgates down there opening and spilling like it was water gushing from a bathroom tap, making a mess of the themselves.

They continued to move slowly while both experiencing aftershocks, lazily kissing each other for a while before Steve rolled to the side, and slowly withdrew, still kissing and panting slowly, "Wow", was all Steve could say once he had sprawled out on his back, Catherine still tingling and catching her breath turned her head slightly to look at Steve and laughed, "I know, wow.. We still got it Sailor". It took a bit of coaxing, but finally he managed to get Catherine off the bed so he could clean them up and the bed up before they headed off to a peaceful and sound sleep.

As they began to fall asleep next to each other, both lying naked under the sheets, pressed as close to each other as they could possibly get, Steve revelled in the fact that despite the tragic event of his mother's death, he knew he would be okay and that was in major part, thanks to the fact Catherine had never left his side since the moment she stepped foot in his hotel room the day he got back to Washington. Smiling as he turned to face her, her own face looking peaceful as she slept, he looked back up at the ceiling, "Thanks Joe for bringing Catherine into my life, and Thanks Mom for bringing her back into my life again". His low whispered words were meant for his ears and the ears of Joe and his mother, though as he closed his eyes, he missed the smile creeping across her own face before it settled into a more relaxed one again.

**Author Notes. **

Thank you all for your patience, I am sorry it's taken a week to get this uploaded, it's been a busy week for me, but I am so happy to have this next chapter up. It is sincerely you guys that keep me invested in this story and I really love being able to continue it. I love reading and re-reading it as much as you all, It's one of my proudest works to date and it makes me feel so happy to share it all with you. I am excited to see where this story will lead and what's going to happen next. Chapter 37 will skip a day and go to the funeral, I know that much, beyond that, I'm not sure. I don't know if I should finish it at the funeral and then start a new story for the next phase of Steve, Catherine and the rest of the five-o Ohana. I do have plans to bring back old characters from the mainland so just not sure if I should continue that in this story or start a new story, sort of like a follow on or a sequel to this. Let me know if you have any thoughts.

**SteveMcGarrettLover: **

We never know what happened to Lynn or Ellie so I figure they are still on the island and it's very possible they could run into them, it's a small island. No Lynn isn't going to do anything like that, I can see Steve's aneurism face coming out if she did that haha. I am not sure if we will see Lynn again, I will try to add Ellie in there as I did love her in the show, but I promise, even if Lynn appears again, she isn't going to win Steve over at all. I also hope you really enjoy chapter 36, It's the one you have been waiting for I think. I'll admit I was nervous typing this and posting it, it's a lot longer then my usual chapters but I really hope you like the way I created the intimacy between them, and if anything seems not relevant or it seemed to carry on to long, or I could have used something else somewhere, let me know. I really want to make sure I am creating these scenes as best I can including any intimate sex scenes.


	37. Chapter 37

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 37**

Waking up that morning, he had anxious nerves from his head all the way to his feet and his heart was already feeling heavy and sad, the nervous butterflies in his stomach making him feel nauseous. Today was the day that he would be burying his mother, it still hurt just as much as the day he watched her die.. The people in his life that were closest to him, he always had to be watching or listening to their last words, or last breathes.

It all started with Freddie, he watched him sacrifice himself so he could get him and Hesse to safer grounds, then as he was transporting Anton Hesse, he listened through a phone call at the moment his father was shot by Anton's brother. The next death, the only death he didn't watch or listen to personally was Billy Harrington, but it felt similar to him because he had to help Catherine whom had witnessed it through it.

The next death that was close to him was his Aunt Deb, and it was a lot more peaceful than the rest, but still just as upsetting, watching her die as he roused her for breakfast. He had always been close to Aunt Deb and that was probably one of the hardest goodbyes he had ever had to do.. Knowing he had to tell Mary and Joan that their Aunt was gone, it nearly ripped his heart into pieces, Deb was like a second mother to Mary, she practically raised her. It was Joan arriving in their lives and then Deb's death that continued to help the siblings grow closer.

Joe White, if Deb was like Mary's second mother, Joe was like his second father, and though the men had their differences when he was being evasive about his mother, he still saw him as a father figure and his mentor. He is one he really had to thank for bringing Catherine into his life. Sure, Catherine and Steve were friends but it was Joe that helped him find the courage to ask Catherine out and he never once regretted that decision, they had a rough few years but now were settling down happily. He felt Joe's death was as painful as his own father's was and watching him die in his arms while watching a beautiful sun set, it was heartbreaking for him.

That was when he knew he needed to make changes, Joe had told him he needed to find a woman and settle down.. Catherine was the woman for him and Joe's death was the catalyst for getting them back on the road to where they both wanted and needed to be. Grace's accident not long after Joe's death just proved to him how short life was, and that not everyone would die by a gunshot wound or some kind of explosion or violent death. It was the first time he realised how badly he wanted to be a husband and a father himself.

His mother's death, he never expected it to happen this way. He saw it as a rescue mission, to get her home safe and sound, not to be burying her next to his father, he wanted more time with her, to make amends and to do things that a mother and her adult son would do together since they never got a lot of time together. Catherine was a great support time him, she still had both her parents and yet she always seemed to know just what to say and do to comfort him.

Sitting up in bed next to him, she moved closer, wrapping her arms around him and kissing him on his shoulder. She knew it was going to be a hard day.. She remembered when she lost her grandfather, her mother's father and that was hard enough for her. She couldn't imagine what having to bury your mother would feel like after already having buried your father. "We'll get through this Steve.. I can't pretend to know what it's like to lose both parents and I can't say I understand, but what I can say is.. I've got you, you don't have to go through this alone".

She remembered those words when she was retiring from the Navy full time before she decided to re-enter as a reservist and he had given her that Chicago vinyl album and had told her something very similar. Turning his head to look at her, he smiled softly and leaned in to kiss her gently. "I know, I've got you, I've got Mary, Joanie, and all our five-o family.. I feel lucky, I really do".

As hard as it was to realise the only blood relative he had left was Mary, he knew deep down that family didn't just come from blood, it came from many different walks of life and he had so many people who loved and respected him, there were people that he didn't even think he would ever get along with like Lou Grover and now Lou is one of his best mates and confidants along with Danny.

He continued, his throat closing up a little and the tears already threatening to spill, "I just miss her Cath.. I know we had a complicated history, but she was my mother and I loved her regardless.. The only reason why I spent so much time tracking her down over the years is because from the moment she walked out of my life, I wanted her back in it and when I found out she was alive, I just wanted her home with us".

Catherine was tearing up as well, it was hard to see Steve this way, he was always so stoic and never really let much get to him, nodding her head, she moved a tiny bit closer and held him tighter. "I know Steve, and I know you will have days where you will feel down and sad about it for a while, it's gonna take time, but we'll get through it… You are strong Sailor and I love you with all of my heart".

Turning fully, he smiled, lifting her up onto his lap, "I love you more then I've ever loved anyone Cath and I'm so grateful you are here with me now and we can start our lives together". He pressed his lips to hers and kissed her softly, his arms wrapping around her tighter. "I'm always here, why don't we get up, showered and dressed, I had your dress blues pressed, they are hanging up in the wardrobe".

Kissing him once more, she then began to move off his lap to stand, holding her arm out to him, "Come on, let's get this day done so we can start to heal and mend once it's all over". He nodded, taking her hand and letting her help him out of bed, and lead him to the bathroom for a shower. It was going to be a long day, but he knew he could do it with the support of Cath and his family.

**Author's Notes: **

Thank you for all the support with this story, it began back in November of last year and it's still going very strong even now. I am so thankful and grateful have all your support from everyone who keeps reading the latest chapters. It fills my heart with so much happiness and joy to be able to bring these characters and their love story to life for you all.

**SteveMcGarrettLover: **

I am so thrilled you enjoyed these last twoI am looking forward to keeping this going for a bit longer, you will see what I mean in my author notes for chapter 38, the chapter is much longer and the author notes are as well. I really appreciate your comments on how well I did the love scene, I was nervous doing that one and so it meant a lot to me that you made me feel more confident again in what I was writing. As you know, I have now done two other scenes in which would be considered more intimate and it's thanks to you, I know I am uploading this on a Sunday and you can't read it till Monday but take your time and can't wait to read your reviews, Mahalo.

**Pilarmnavas: **

Thank you for your support and kind words. I am loving the development of their story as well and am enjoying writing this, also you are very welcome, if you haven't read it, there is a love scene in Right here waiting as well. I'd love to hope she does, I know Peter said their story is not over but the fact Brooke showed up in the latest Valentines Day episode has me concerned now as well. I'll always make sure Steve and Cath are together or get back together in any story I write so McRoll is always safe in my hands.


	38. Chapter 38

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 38**

**Author's Notes: **

**Warning: Possible Triggers  
**This might trigger people if you have recently experienced a death/been to a funeral of someone close to you. Just wanted to give a warning before the chapter began.

Once everyone was seated, the funeral director began, "I want to start by welcoming you all this morning.. Before we begin, I'd like to announce that the family invites you back to Commander McGarrett's home for refreshments after the service, please turn your cell phones off or to silent". He looking over at the handful of mourners. It wasn't a massive crowd, though he could sense that the people that were here were the ones that wanted to be here, even if they didn't know the deceased personally.

He had spoken to Steve and Mary for a few moments before the service was to begin, both had expressed a desire to say a few words as did little Joanie whom he could see was struggling to come to terms with the loss of her grandmother, but was determined to speak.

"Ladies, gentleman and little ones", he looked warmly at Joan whom was sitting next to Charlie, before looking back to everyone else. "My name is Peter Garcia and I'm a civil celebrant.. On behalf of Spenser and Johnson funeral home, I thank everyone for coming to share and honor the memory of Doris McGarrett today".

He continued with the service, giving the eulogy and talking about Doris's life, as much as he had been told by Steve and Mary McGarrett, the children of the deceased. Most of it centred around what she had done for a living on the island and serving her country for the CIA.

Steve sat with Catherine to his left and Mary to his right, with Joan to her right. His left hand was entwined with Catherines, while his right hand was around Mary's shoulder, Mary leaning into him with her own arm around Joan. The five-o team sat in seats directly behind Steve and Mary, with other members of the five-o Ohana including Rachel, Renee Grover and even Duke and his wife Lara.

Behind them were a lot of of the HPD and even the Navy were present since Doris's husband and son were officers in the Navy. Before he knew it, Peter was calling him up to say a few words, "Now I call on Commander Steven McGarrett, who would like to say a few words about his mother".

Before he went, Catherine squeezed his hand, and kissed his cheek, "You can do this", whispering in his ear before he let go of her hand and stood up to take his place behind the little podium stand they had set up.

"For those of you who know about my mother's past, this isn't the first time I've had to say goodbye to her", he had a slight tremble to his voice, but he continued, he had written something and it was in front of him, and part of him was reading it and the other part improvising. "I thought at the time it was the last time I'd say goodbye.. that was when I was only fifteen years old".

Taking a breath to steady himself, he let it out slowly, "Even knowing now that this is the /final/ time I get to say goodbye to her, it doesn't make it any easier.. My mother and I, we had a complicated past, that's not what today is about, for the first fifteen years of my life, she was just my Mom, the woman that raised me and helped guide me through those first fifteen years and that is the woman that I want to remember".

The tears were starting to fall now, Catherine reaching for Mary's hand to squeeze without taking her eyes off Steve, Lou rubbing Mary's back from his row behind her when he heard her choke back a sob, Joanie leaving her seat to go sit with her Uncle Danny where she buried her head into his shoulder, rubbing gentle circles on her back.

"The Mom who helped me make a working volcano when I was ten for the science parade, the Mom who tucked me into bed at night and reassured me that Dad would be home safe and sound, the Mom who helped me ride my bike without training wheels, and the Mom that took me shopping for a Valentines Day gift for Mary because she was sad she didn't get anything at school".

Watching her die in front of him and the things she had said, it did give him perspective and it made him start to see her in a different light. He still hated that she had essentially abandoned her husband and children, and yet it made her a more realistic person in his eyes, a woman that was trying to do the right thing even though she left her family behind. He would never truly understand her reasons, but he could sense some of what she shared with him that day she died.

"Her leaving the way she did, the chain of events that happened afterwards, the only positive I can take from it is that it made me the man I am today, and helped introduce me to the people I know today", he looked specifically at Catherine and smiled softly. If his Dad had never shipped him off the island and to the Naval academy, he would never have met Catherine because he had always strived to be a HPD police officer before he left the island.

"I love you Mom, and I'll always miss you". With that, he stepped off the podium and took the white rose he had in his hand and placed it on the closed coffin, putting his finger to his lips, and then pressed it to the coffin, taking a few moments alone, everyone quiet and watching him before he made his way back to Catherine and sat down.

The funeral director spoke again, and this time asked Mary to come up to say a few words. Taking a deep breath, she turned to her big brother who gave her a hug, "Love you Mare", he whispered encouragingly, her tears already falling, nodding back and mouthing 'I love you too bro".

She stepped up to the podium with her own white rose, and sighed softly.. "My brother has been trying to get me to move back to the island since he first came home ten years ago.. The island stopped feeling like my home when our Mom /died/ in that car accident, or as we found out later a car bomb. I never told Steve why I was hesitant in coming back, it was because I had all these great memories of time spent with my parents, and Steve as a kid that I felt it would be too painful to come home and relieve all those memories".

Stopping for a moment, she looked out, seeing Joan watching her while still tucked up safely in Danny's arms, little Charlie's hand holding hers, and she took another breath, wiping her tears with her kleenex, "When Steve told me she was alive, I was hesitant to let her back in, I didn't want to be hurt again, but little by little, she started to come around even when Joan and I was in L.A and knowing that Joan at least deserved to know her grandmother, I gave her a second chance.. It was the best decision I made because I got to spend time with my mother and Joan with her grandmother before we lost her for good".

Those moments were really good moments too, she got to see her mother as a grandmother and being silly and funny with her granddaughter, and it was worth the fear of being hurt again because like her brother, all she wanted from the moment her mother left her life was her back in it as well. "Because of everything that's happened recently, Joan and I have finally made the decision to come home back to the island for good, and I thank my mother for helping to make that happen.. Life is short and I know Mom and Dad would want Steve and I to be closer and for Joan to be close to her family". Turning to face the coffin, she sighed sadly, walking slowly over to it, "I love you so much Mommy", before breaking down, leaning down and kissing the coffin as she placed the rose down next to Steve's rose.

It had been softly spoken but Steve had heard how she called Doris Mommy and it broke his heart.. He squeezed Catherine's hand a little tighter as he struggled to keep his own emotions in check again and watched as she came back to sit beside him, his arm wrapping around her shoulder once more, and leaning in to kiss her forehead, "Proud of you Sis".

Again the funeral director spoke, and then he came over to where Joan was sitting and quietly asked her if she would still like to say something. She nodded her head shyly and Danny stood up with her, carrying her over to where the podium was, "If you need me to take over, just let me know honey", he told her quietly as she clutched her own white rose in one hand and a little bunny her grandmother had brought for her as an easter present.

Both Steve and Mary were sitting there, hands clutched together as they watched their daughter and niece.. Joanie hadn't know Doris for long, but it was the McGarrett in her that gave her the bravery to get up and say something and he never cherished his friendship with Danny more than now in this moment for being the one to take her up there. They might whine and whinge about each other at times but at the most important moments of their lives, they knew they could count on each other.

"My Nanny took me to the park and the zoo, and looked after me a couple times when I was sick and Mommy had to work.. She even gave me ice cream to make me feel better… She told me stories and brought me special presents", she played with one of the buttons on Danny's shirt as she spoke, her lower lip quivering a little, "She gave the best hugs ever and I miss her so much, Mommy and Uncle Steve told me she is in heaven with Poppa, I hope Poppa takes good care of her because she is special to me".

Both Steve and Mary had made it a priority to never speak badly about Doris or about her past too much to or in front of Joan. When Doris came back into their lives, Mary had asked Steve his opinion about having her around Joan and though his own feelings for his mother were complicated, he knew Joan deserved to know her grandmother.. He had been hesitant at first when Mary first adopted her but he quickly changed his mind when he saw Mary and Joan together.

Being adopted, he knew that though Joan knew she was adopted, it was a closed adoption. The birth parents didn't want any contact at all with Joan or Mary and so she only had Mary and Steve and now her five-o family and island family that Steve had brought into Mary and Joan's lives, and so having at least one grandparent in her life could only be good for her.

Joanie then whispered in Danny's ear and he nodded, patting her back gently as he walked her over to the coffin and leaned over so she could place the rose on the coffin like she had seen her uncle and mother do. "Love you so much Nanny, I miss you". She leaned further in and kissed the coffin too and then sat up straighter in Danny's arms, burying her head in his shoulder, clutching her bunny closer to her chest, "Shh, it's okay Joanie", Danny whispered as he cuddled her close, walking back over to take their seats. Both Mary and Danny expected Joan to want to go back to her mother but they were both surprised when she snuggled in more to Danny once he sat down, showing she was just as comfortable with him as she was Mary, Steve and Cath.

The funeral director came back up to the podium and he began talking again, "It is appropriate now to pause for a moment, those who are believers might like to pray, others might choose to reflect on Doris's life and the meaning it holds for you. During this time, the family have chosen a special song for you to listen to that resonates with both the McGarrett children, Mama's arms which was written and is sung by Joshua Kadison".

Once the song was over, he continued to speak, "Our thoughts are with the family, to Doris's two children Steven and Mary, Steven's partner Catherine and her granddaughter Joan, and anyone else who knew Doris and cared for her or even just cared for her family, we extend to you our deepest sympathy.. Doris is to be buried with her husband Lieutenant Sergeant John McGarrett, in sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life through our Lord Jesus Christ, we comment to almighty god Doris Jean McGarrett. And we commit her body to the ground, earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust, may the Lord bless her, and keep her, the Lord make his face to shine upon her, be gracious to her, the Lord lift up his countenance upon her and give her peace, Amen".

With that the final music came on, a song that Joan had picked up, It was the day you went away by an artist named Wendy Matthews, even at her tender young age of seven, she had heard her Mommy listen to this song and it seemed the perfect song to end the service with and as they all began to stand to watch the coffin being lowered into the ground and the first bit of dirt being thrown onto the coffin once it was lowered, Catherine could feel Steve's shoulders moving and she pulled him into her arms and held him close, letting him cry and get it out. He hadn't cried much at all and she knew he was afraid once he started he wouldn't be able to stop.

Lou had already anticipated Mary needing someone to lean on and so had come forward to wrap his arms around the woman that he viewed as like a younger sister, his hand moving in circular patterns on her back to comfort her, Danny doing the same with Joanie, swaying his body from side to side gently. The rest of the five-o Ohana decided to pay their respects back at the house and get a start on preparations for the food and refreshments so they headed back to their cars, letting the McGarretts take their time to grieve.

**Author's' Note**

I'm going to apologise for the length of this chapter. I know most people don't mind longer ones, this one was intentional because I didn't want the funeral service to lead into the next chapter. I wanted chapter 39 to be once they got back to Steve and Catherine's home and I wanted to kind of rip the bandaid off and get this one done because I knew it would be a terribly sad one to do.

I feel this one has been a really hard one for me to do as well, I have been to a few close family members funerals before including my own Nan's when I was seventeen, the reason I kept holding off on doing these last two chapters was because it was my the anniversary of my Nan's death on the 7th February and though she has been gone for eighteen years this year, it's still difficult for me as well. It' s a tough subject in general to write about but this was what this story was always leading into so I do apologise if was too overwhelming or to upsetting for anyone, I just like to be as realistic as I can be in my own versions.

Going forward, I will keep going on with this one till it meets up with Thinking out loud, so even though I am a few months late, I'll do a Christmas and a New Year chapter and try to keep it on a generalised time table to meet up with the new story I added yesterday. I'll also continue to add chapters for Right here waiting and finish off Thinking out loud and adding chapters to I need you. I will also add a new story to the mix when Chin, Abby and Sara come back to the island as well. I feel those characters deserve their own stories.

One thing I have been unsure of is Danny and Rachel.. I do ship them hardcore, but It seems Danny is going through a bit of a crisis lately with his relationship with Rachel, he hooked up with that Joanna whom died in that car accident and I unsure how to proceed with Danny/Rachel.. I could go one of three ways.

1: The death of Joanna made him realise he needs to put a bit more romance and effort into his relationship with Rachel

2: Joanna in my version doesn't die and he ends it with Rachel for good and takes things slow with Joanna.

3: Joanna dies, however the short meeting he had with Joanna makes him realise it can't work with Rachel and he walks away, and perhaps someone from his past, Gabby for example comes back into his life and they decide to try again.

One thing I saw with Danny and Joanna was him smiling and enjoying that first meeting and knowing you have met someone special. I don't enjoy seeing anyone else with Steve, not that I don't like the character but I don't like the coupling but with Danny, I was rooting for Joanna to live because I did see potential there and was devastated when that chance was ripped from Danny.

Let me know what you think and I'll see how it feels writing it.. I am just unsure at the moment and need a bit of advice and direction from fellow fans who might want to see something go a specific way.


	39. Chapter 39

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 39**

A short time later Steve was pulling up his truck in it's space at the front of his home.. He sighed softly, turning the engine off and taking the keys out. "We can sit here for a moment if you want Sailor, there is no rush". Catherine could sense the sadness in Steve.. Whilst she had never had to personally experience losing both of her parents or either of her parents for that matter, she could empathise with him and that made her want to protect him even more. He was a strong man, everything he had been through in his life had helped him become the man he was today.

"I'm okay Cath, I've got you, you are my anchor.. I know the team is hurting too, even the ones that didn't know Mom.. They are hurting for me.. and the ones that did meet Mom, they know though we had a complicated history, we were mother and son at the end of the day and whatever she did, she did to protect her family". It was time to go inside and be embraced by his five-o Ohana, and let them support him..

In the past he had been distant in these kinds of situations.. When his father and Freddie died, he didn't know anyone well, even Danny, Chin and Kono, they were only new friendships, Catherine was the only one he confided in those early days.. No matter what she was doing or where she was, she always picked up the phone for him, and when they were together, she let him cry, let him vent, and helped him to grieve and now she was here to do it all over again for him.

Leaning over her seat, she pressed her lips to his and kissed him softly, "Let me know if it's getting too much and I'll deal with everyone". She was planning on that same speech with Mary and Joanie as well.. She was the rock, she needed to be his rock today, and despite how sad she was feeling herself, it was her job today to keep him together and let him lose control of his emotions, no matter what he needed.

Getting out of the car, Danny had driven Mary and Joan back in the camaro and was right behind them.. He had given Mary and Joan a similar speech about letting them know if they needed to head upstairs and away from everyone.. Lou and his wife Renee were right behind them as well. "You wanna change pumpkin or stay in this for a while?", Mary asked her daughter as Danny lifted her out of the car and placed her on his hip. "Change Momma". Nodding her head, she leaned in and kissed her daughters cheek, "I'll take her upstairs and get her changed if you want Mare?" Danny asked her in a soft voice.

"Thanks Danny, I'd appreciate that a lot". Mary trusted Danny as much as she trusted Steve and seeing as her daughter was just as content to be in Danny's arms, she no sooner wanted to remove her from him when she was comfortable. "Come on sweetie, we'll go upstairs and find something a bit more comfortable to put on". Catherine turned to look at Steve, he was so incredible handsome in his dress blues, it always managed to take her breath away when he wore them.. "How bout you Sailor… Want to change into something a little more comfortable as well?", she asked him in a soft voice, tugging at his tie.

His dress blues were quite hot, and the formal part of the day was over so he figured it was not a bad idea since he was home to just duck upstairs and get changed into something a little more casual. "I'll be back in a few", he leaned in, kissed her cheek and headed inside and slipped up the stairs before anyone could really notice he was there… "You wanna change at all Mare?", the single mother looked exhausted and emotional but she shook her head, "I'm fine.. I'll change later on.. Kind of just want to get this whole day over with if you know what I mean".

Nodding her head, Catherine nodded, "I know what you mean.. Come on, let's go in". Taking Mary's hand in hers, she guided her inside and into the living room where Tani, Koa, Junior and Adam were standing. Tani walked over and wrapped her arms around Steve's sister and hugged her tight, "I'm so sorry about your Mom Mary.. I'm here if you ever need anything at all, even just to talk". Once they had pulled away, she nodded her thanks and smiled sadly, "Thanks Tani, I appreciate that".

Both Adam and Junior came over, leaving Koa standing on his own, he hadn't met Mary yet so he didn't want to intrude, "Where's Steve and Joanie?", Adam looked around the room to see if he could spot them.. "Ahh Danny took Joan upstairs to get changed and Steve decided to change out of his dress blues as well", Catherine explained to the three of them, just then Danny came down with Joan in a flowery sundress still in his arms.

Everyone was spread around the house, some of them in the living room, others were in the kitchen, some were outside on the lanai.. It was mostly five-o, any partners they had, some members of HPD and neighbours and friends that Steve and Mary had associated with.. Even Chin and Kono's families were there, and as Steve walked down the stairs in his jeans, and a white t-shirt, four people stood at the doorway waiting…

"Kono, Chin.. I.. I can't believe you came", he walked over to them, hand stretched out to shake Chin's hand who pulled him into a hug, then using his other arm to bring Kono in on the hug as well. "We wouldn't miss this Steve.. I'm so sorry about Doris", Chin spoke up first as they pulled away from the hug, "Danny called us and told us what happened". Kono added softly, noticing that Adam was over talking to Catherine, Mary, Danny and Joan. "Thanks for coming guys, it means a lot to me, and to Mary, and Joan as well".

Noticing Abby Dunn and little Sara Waincroft, he smiled softly as he opened his arms to hug Abby and then knelt down to hug Sara.. "Joanie is over there, and Charlie is here as well…Why don't you guys go out side and play with Eddie". Sara kissed his cheek and then nodded heading over to where Joan was, and tugged on Danny's shirt.. "Hi Uncle Danno", she was a little shy and said it in a low voice but Danny still heard..

"Ohh my goodness, and who have we here.. it can't be Sara Waincroft because she is not that old is she", he joked softly and Joan perked up and smiled, waving at her.. "It's me Uncle Danno", Sara smiled, giggling softly as Joan indicated she wanted to get down, and Danny gently put her down on the ground.. "Wanna go play?", Sara asked Joan, whom nodded, Sara taking her hand and they ran off to find Charlie..

"If Sara is here, that must mean", Catherine responded as she turned around, and smiled softly, "Kono, Chin and Abby are here". Kono rushed over to Catherine and Mary, pulling Mary into her arms and holding onto her tight. "I'm so sorry Hun".. Mary was surprised to see Kono, she knew that her and Adam had moved to the mainland and then they split and only Adam came home, but this was a surprise.. "Thank you, It's good to see you". Kono smiled softly, "It's good to see you too, I'm always here if you need me, I'll give you my number before I leave".

She pulled away, and then hugged Catherine, "and omg Sista, it's good to see you too.. I can't believe you are back on the island girl", Catherine and Kono had kept in touch over the years and whilst Kono had Abby to talk to about any issues she had with Adam, and feelings surrounding their separation, she always confided in her girl best friend Catherine as well. "It's soo good to see you too, missed you Sista". She smiled softly, pulling away a little, "II had a few months left of my 12 month contract with the CIA, but when Doris was killed, I decided now was the time to come home for good and settle down".

In the meantime, Adam had managed to slip outside and go talk to Duke, and a few of the others that were outside, It wasn't that he was happy to see Kono, he really was.. He just didn't know what to say right now to her.. He would speak to her before she left, if he could muster up the courage, but he didn't want their first face to face conversation since he left Nevada to be in front of other people. Danny had gone over to say hello to Chin and Abby, excited to see them.. He knew they were coming, but he hadn't wanted to spoil the surprise.. They had specifically asked him not to mention it and so he didn't.

Steve and Mary were slowly getting around to everyone, it was hard to deal with, both of them feeling burnt out and emotional, but everyone that came to the funeral came for them, so it was about showing their appreciation that they made the effort to come and be there to support them through today, both Catherine, Danny and also Tani and Quinn keeping an eye on the siblings to make sure they were okay and not needing any rescuing.

**Author Notes:  
**This story is turning out better then I had expected and as I'm sitting down to write these chapters, it is all coming together really quickly. It's like the chapters are writing themselves.. I never have been big ideas going into these stories, I just write mainly chapter by chapter and see what comes out once I'm finished, here and there I might have little ideas and if anyone has ideas, I try my best to add them in but otherwise it's all free thrall and it's all turning out so amazing. I'm so proud of this story.. This just just gotten to chapter 39 and 40, and I don't feel it's slowing down anytime soon.. I'm trying to incorporate bits and pieces from other stories, or even if a future story has began, hint at it happening in pics that are before it in the time line.. Thank you for coming on this journey with me, I adore you all.

**Guest:  
**Sorry, I'd write your name, but there was none left xx Thank you so much, I appreciate you reading.

**jenmatl9 (wouldn't let me write it how it's written in your profile)  
**I adore the bond I have created between Joanie and Danny as well.. I feel she would be as comfortable with him as she is with Steve. That is interesting, Danny/Mary pairing is different but interesting.. I love Rachel/Danny but it does feel like in the show, it is over between them.. I always liked Gabby and was sad when she left the show, I thought she had a really good rapport with Grace as well, whereas that Melissa/Amber was a bit young for Danny and didn't gel well with Grace. I feel to be in Danny's world, the woman has to get on with his kids and respect they come first where Gabby certainly did that.

**SteveMcGarrettLover:  
**Thank you, I am glad you loved it, and yeah I did miss some other friends that the had to kill or others that betrayed him, Nick Taylor in season one, Jenna Keye (that one really devastated me because I genuinely liked her). Catherine is just perfect for him and I love them together, either watching the show, reading other peoples works or writing my own. You are welcome for the Valentines Day story, I am so so happy you liked it. I'm glad the funeral scene was taken really well, I feel and not big noting myself but it is just getting better and better this story. That's an interesting idea as well, I'm still unsure what to do with Danny and his love life right now, but I'm gonna have a good thing and decide who he should be with but the love triangle would be a cool idea to do..

**Sarah Y:  
**Thank you so much, I am glad you loved the funeral scene, I wasn't sure how people might take it, it's why I put the warning up, but it was given so much care and thought that I think it turned out really well. Awe, I'm sorry I made you cry but honestly, when my writing resonates with someone so much they feel that emotion to the point of crying or laughing out loud, then I know I have written a really good piece of work.. That's how I judge a good show/movie or piece of writing myself, that I can feel the emotions.

**LuckyStarPham:  
**I can see you reviewed chapter 36 which was the sex scene, thank you so much.. If you want to read more, I do have a sex scene in my Right here waiting and my Thinking out loud stories as well if you want to read those. Awe, that makes me feel good knowing people love re-reading my stories.. I admit, I do the same with my favs as well, I go back and read them over and over.. I am glad I made your day.


	40. Chapter 40

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 40**

Several hours later, everything was beginning to slowly wind down and people were starting to leave, however Lou and Renee were about to head off as they had some things they had to do.. "Let me know if you and Joanie need anything you hear me okay..", Renee hugged Mary one last time, Mary nodding her head and smiling softly. "Thanks Renee, I really appreciate all of your and Lou's love and support.. It's been amazing, all of the team have made me really feel apart of the Ohana".

Lou smiled as he too hugged Mary and chuckled, "That's because you and that beautiful little girl of yours are Ohana and we'd follow Steve to the ends of the earth and that includes making sure his baby sister and niece are supported and feel loved as well". Lou and Steve had a rough start but since then, they had both come a long way, with both men looking at the other as a brother and so part of that for Lou was looking at Mary as his sister as well and Joanie as a niece.

It was nice to know that they all thought of her as family and that they all had embraced her into this crazy Ohana.. The decision to move back to the island had been made a lot easier knowing that she had people to support her and care for her and her daughter.. She had friends and a life, job and Joan had friends and school in Los Angeles, however it seemed like a better option, to come home to more stability, more family and more support as in L.A, despite having friends, she was really on her own for most things.

"Thanks Lou, we love you guys too". She watched as they left, waving at them, Steve having already said goodbye to them came over, standing behind her as she waved and rubbed her shoulders.. "How you doing Sis, haven't seen much of you the rest of the afternoon". Standing there for another moment and letting her muscles be massaged, she closed her eyes and sighed softly.. "I'm exhausted bro, how are you going?", she looked over her shoulder slightly as he kept massaging.. "I'm doing okay, exhausted as well, but it's good to know we have a lot of love and support around us".

Nodding her head, she smiled softly, "Thanks, that feels so much better", as he stopped massaging and she turned around to face him.. "I'm really grateful your Ohana has become my Ohana as well.. Honestly.. Ever since we were shipped off to the mainland, I felt isolated and like I had nobody.. I mean I had Aunt Deb and she was amazing, but I just didn't feel that same stability and happiness I felt before.. Our entire family was split up on to different parts of the universe it felt like and so now, it feels nice to be back home and to have that feeling of being part of something important".

Steve knew exactly what she meant, "I know.. and I know Mom and Dad are gone, but we still have family, family is more than blood, and these guys love you and Joanie as though you are blood to them". It was then that Tani and Junior came over to Steve and Mary, most of the HPD guys had gone, but Duke and his family remained and so did the rest of five-o.. "Boss, we're gonna head off, we've got a case.." She said softly, looking up at Steve, hoping he wouldn't insist on coming along. "Thanks for being here, and go… let me know if you need me or Cath".

Junior nodded, and saluted, to which Steve saluted back, talking this time to Junior.. "Lou's gone already, I think he and Renee had something they had do to, but call him if you need him.. Take Adam and Quinn if you need to as well". Lowering his arm, he nodded his head, "Quinn and Adam are already on their way out as well.. let us know if you need anything". He said as he walked out, Tani behind him..

Catherine was outside with Kono, Chin, Abby and Sara, sitting out on the patio furniture, Quinn, Duke, his wife Laura and Adam having been out in the dinning room talking, and they soon came out to the living area as well.. "Be careful out there, let me know if there is anything you need from me", Steve said to Quinn and Adam as they said their goodbyes, "Steve, Mary, let Duke and I know if you need anything at all.. and if you want to set up a play date with Akela and Joanie, or need me to baby-sit let us know.. We're happy to do what we can.. You both are Ohana to us".

Laura smiled softly, putting one hand on Steve's cheek and the other on Mary's, Steve smiling back and moving his arm from around Mary's shoulder to rest on Laura's hand, "We will, and thank you so much for everything you both have done for our family, not just today, but over the years.. It's much appreciated". They headed out after more hugs and thanks, saying their goodbyes, and as he closed the door, he sighed in relief nearly..

Dog was still there as was Hirsch, Kammie and Flippa whom had helped to provide the food, Frank Bama, Harry Langford, Wade Gutches, Nicky Demarco, Harry Brown, majority of them outside mingling, Charlie was playing with Sara and Joan in the sand with Rachel and Danny watching them as they sat on the wooden seats near the sand..

Letting out a loud and rather big yawn, Steve chuckled at his kid sister, "Go take a nap Mare.. I think you more then deserve it". Patting his shoulder, she smiled, kissing his cheek.. "what about Joanie?", she asked looking at him even though she was struggling to stay awake.. "She's out there having fun making sandcastles, Danny and Rachel are keeping an eye on the three of them.. go.. we'll be fine".

Finally deciding to take his advice, she headed up the stairs, heading into the ensuite bathroom that Steve had built in the room Junior had been staying in, she decided to have a nice warm bath first and then grab a nap, Steve heading into the kitchen to grab a beer when Nicky walked in.. "I'm gonna head off son.. I've gotta prepare for tonight, but if you need anything, you or Mary, anything at all, let me know". Taking the top off his beer, he nodded, "Thanks Nick, I appreciate it".

Patting Steve's shoulder, he nodded and then walked out of the kitchen, letting himself out.. Sipping his beer, he sighed softly, watching out the window and then headed outside to join everyone else.. "Hello there old chap, I didn't get to see you earlier, I just wanted to offer my condolences", Harry joined Steve and put his arm on his shoulder.. "Thanks Harry.. I appreciated it man". They both took a sip of their beer at the same time, "How is retirement treating you anyway brother?", he added looking over at the former British spy.

"I am finding it a little bit mundane as you American's would say as a matter of fact.. I have been writing a novel as a matter of fact, it's become a bit of a best seller". At that, Steve's eyes went wide, and he nearly choked on his beer. "Wow, that.. that's amazing buddy.. I can't believe it, a writer". Harry smirked at his friend and chuckled, "Mock all you want, but I've got a six book deal".

Walking over to where Catherine, Kono, Chin and Abby were, they both sat down, Steve chuckled, "Wow, honestly Harry, I think it's amazing.. I'm glad you found something you are passionate about", Looking at the rest of the group, he smiled softly, however he couldn't hide the tiredness, "Harry here was just telling me about a six book deal he has and that his written one novel already".

Catherine smiled and raised her bottle to clink with Harry's, "Well Congratulations Harry, I'll be sure to buy a copy", while Kono did the same, "way to go Harry". Chin and Abby congratulated him and then Chin asked to see Steve alone for a moment and brought up Adam, "So what's going on with Adam these days brah?", asking Steve quietly.. "He's doing well, adjusting to life ass a full time member of five-o, apparently he is seeing someone, but aside from meeting her when she was a bride, and her fiancé was murdered, we haven't met her officially so I don't think it's anything serious, why?"

Chin sighed softly, sipping his beer, "I know Kono was a bit thrown to see him.. I told her he would most likely be here, but still.. I think there are still feelings there brah". Steve had to agree with that as well.. "Honestly, I don't think that Adam has ever stopped loving Kono, and I don't think whatever is going on with this Tamiko is serious at all". Chin began to walk a bit further away, leading Steve with him when he could see Kono's interest piping up..

"We need to find a way to get Kono back on the island.. She isn't happy Steve.. Abby, Sara and I are moving back, my mother's health is declining and I want to be there as a support for her, maybe I can talk her into moving back". Taking another drink, he added, "I'm sorry to burden you with this today of all days". Sighing softly, Steve put his hand in his pocket, "You aren't a burden Chin, and I'm sorry your mother isn't well.. You know that you and Kono are welcome to come back to five-o.. Abby too if she wants".

Chuckling he smiled at that invitation, "I know Abby has put in for a transfer back to HPD, she likes it there.. more of the normal every day things.. she likes the work the taskforce does, but she likes the everyday side of policing as well.. As for me, if you got room for me with all your new recruits, I'm there brah.. just gotta talk Kono into coming home where she belongs as well, maybe we should get Catherine and Mary to tag team her and talk her into it, by the way I'm glad to see she is back.. I'm really happy for you both".

Looking over Chin's shoulder to where Catherine was sitting, talking animatedly with Kono, Abby, Frank, both Harry's, he smiled softly.. He might be still stuck in the grief process, but one thing was for sure.. He knew he was lucky to have such an incredibly amazing woman by his side.. All his fears he had when she came back when Grace had her accident were long gone, and he was feeling a bit more settled now.


	41. Chapter 41

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 41**

Sighing softly, Steve rubbed his eyes with the palms of his hands, blinking a few times to try to stay awake. Everyone had mostly gone home, it was just him, Catherine, Danny, Mary and Joan. Joan had gone to sleep hours before on her Uncle Chin and he had put her to bed before he left for the evening, promising with everyone to catch up before they had to leave to go back to San Francisco.

Sitting out on the back porch, looking out over the water.. He was thinking about how it was was over two weeks till Thanksgiving and then from there about another month till Christmas.. When all of this first began, he was hoping his mother would be with him for these moments and now he had just spent the day saying his final goodbyes to her.

"Steve? Penny for your thoughts?", Danny asked, looking over at him from across the table. "Sorry", he sighed again and moved his attention back to Danny and the girls. "I'm just thinking about how I was hoping Mom would have been here for Thanksgiving and Christmas/New Year.. and now she is gone".

Catherine and Mary could both sense that the two men needed to talk so they excused themselves and headed further down to the water and sat down on the chairs to have a conversation between the two of them.

"I know how you feel buddy.. When I found out Matty was dead.. I thought and felt the same things you are feeling and thinking now.. plus I was thinking how in the hell am I going to tell Gracie, and my parents he is dead.. It's all normal things to be thinking, and I know it will take some time.. you will heal and you know already that we're all here for you".

Smiling softly, he nodded his head, sipping his beer. He knew how hard it had been for Danny to grieve his brother and to slowly move back to normal, and he knew it would take a while to heal.. "I appreciate you being here Danny, and with my Dad, I didn't have a lot of time to grieve.. I hit the ground running as soon as I got here.. I barely had time to be at his funeral and then as you know, we were working on getting Hesse.. this time.. I have the time to take to grieve and I just..".

He shrugged his shoulders taking a deep breath, "I feel like if I start crying, I'm not gonna stop you know".

Putting his hand on his shoulder, Danny sighed and nodded, "I'm right there with you buddy… I was exactly the same and I felt I had to be strong for Grace and my parents as well.. I'm not gonna make promises or say words that don't mean a thing.. It's gonna be tough Steve and it's gonna hurt.. but you need to cry and grieve.. I know you have told me before McGarrett men are built differently and not to touch on their emotions, but this brother.. even if it's crying on Cath's shoulder, do it.. you need it".

It all made sense and he knew Danny was right about it all. He had never really grieved for his father, he had jumped in and taken the man responsible for his death down and then he got busy building his new task force up and adjusting to living full time back on the island. "You and Cath, you two have been mine and Mary's backbone through it all, and we can't thank you both enough for just being here for us".

Even now, Steve had to thank them, did he not yet realise that both Danny and Catherine would do anything to prevent Steve and Mary from feeling any pain if they could.. All they could do now was to be there to help them both pick up the pieces and deal with the grief. Danny had both parents still as did Catherine but that didn't mean they couldn't empathise with how Steve and Mary felt.

"Of course we are going to be here for you both.. We're your family Steve, we're Mary and Joanie's family.. of course there is nowhere else we'd both rather be".

The very fact that Steve had to thank the two of them for being there, it showed that Steve was used to doing thing alone and being abandoned by the ones he loved and cared for.. It broke his heart a little to be honest, but he knew that Steve was a lot better then he was ten year ago when they first met.. He is a lot more open to trusting people and letting people in.

"I know.. and I can't believe that ten years ago, I came back to this island alone and I found in you a best friend and a brother for life.. and five-o is really become a family for all of us.. I was hurting and in pain when I came home, having just lost Freddie and my Dad.. I wasn't looking for a new best friend because I thought it would dishonourable to Freddie, but than I had a dream.. Freddie was telling me to let you in, that you were a good guy".

It felt like he knew exactly what Steve was referring to because he had a similar feeling when he first met the guy.. His grandfather whom had already passed away, he appeared to him in a vision or a dream.. He had only gotten close to one person on the island and that was Mecha and then he met Steve, whom at the time felt like more of an annoyance then a friend, but his grandfather appeared to him, telling him to give the guy a chance.

"Funnily enough, I had my grandfather appear in a dream, I was close to him as well.. and since moving to the island, I had only gotten close to Mecha and then I met you.. I wanted to walk away from the taskforce, tell Tanaka I wanted back into HPD, but then the day before I was going to do that, I had that vision.. and it was my grandfather telling me to give you a chance.. and honestly buddy, I'm glad I did because I realised that you are the best friend a guy could have".

They had come a long way, from two men that had pointed their guns at each other in the garage of this very house when they first met, and now considered each other brothers and best friends.. "Right back at ya", Steve responded, smiling softly, his eyes twinkling a little, half from the tears and sadness he felt and half from the happiness he felt at the same time.

**Author's Notes **

First and foremost, I just want to thank each and every single one of you for coming on this journey with me and my McRoll story. It is not done, not by a long shot, but I just wanted to say how much I appreciate you all, and feel so blessed to have amazing readers who love what I write. Again, I want to reassure anyone that hasn't kept up to date with my other stories, my time here will not come to an end once Hawaii five-o is done.. I'll keep writing and keep creating as much amazing content as I can.

With everything that is happening in the world, with much of the world on lockdown, and not being able to go out and enjoy our usual things, we turn to novels, books, fan fiction, movies, tv shows, crafts, etc to entertain ourselves so that is another reason I'll be remaining right here where I am, continuing these stories. Much of the state I live in, in Australia has been shut down to non-essential services. My role is still in a essential service role, however I am very lucky that I work in a contact centre and am able to work from home.. It means I am able continue working and stay safe at the same time as I am immunocompromised.

I hope everyone is staying safe, and washing their hands regularly, practicing social distance where you can, and only going out to get essential goods and services. For a lot of you, it won't mean much getting this virus, but for someone like myself, it can mean major health issues so lets look after each other, be kind to each other, don't hoard and be kind to yourself as well.

**SteveMcGarrettLover: **

Thank you so very much, I really am glad you liked that chapter, I'm still really enjoying writing this one, and I don't think it will be stopped anytime soon, I also love included as many of the guest starting roles as I can, the ones that we all know mean a lot to Steve and I know it is a massive difference to when his father died, it was just him.. and now for his mother's death, it shows how far he has come in his journey that he has so many people there for him.


	42. Chapter 42

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 42**

Meanwhile, at the same time that Steve and Danny were having a talk, Catherine had not only sensed that Steve needed to talk man to man to Danny, but she could also sense that Mary needed to talk woman to woman to her, so that was another reason for their slight change of scenery. The two of them headed down closer to the water and sat on the wooden chairs just near the edge of the sand, both had a beer in their hands.

"How are you holding up Mare?", Catherine asked in a soft low voice, her head turning slightly to gage Mary's reaction to her question. Shaking her head, she sipped on her beer and sighed, lowering it back down to her side.. "Right now, I'm feeling numb.. like I want to cry, but I just can't… I felt that way with Dad too".

It was her biggest regret, not attending her father's funeral.. She had managed to get herself back to Hawaii for it, but she just couldn't find the strength to be there in person.. Instead she had been on the beach all day getting high, making sure that Steve didn't know she was there because he wouldn't have been happy in the slightest knowing she had been there but still missed the funeral.

It was just her way of coping back then… She had turned to drugs from a young age, her Aunt Deb had tried to keep her on the straight and narrow, and it wasn't anything that Deb did wrong, it was just that feeling of abandonment, first her mother was killed, or so she thought, and then her father sent her and her older brother to the mainland, both to different places.. She had not seen her father again and she hadn't seen her brother since she came home shortly after the funeral.

It had taken Mary a long time to get her life sorted out, but once she had seen Steve, she knew she really needed to sort her life out and get back on the straight and narrow. She always was pride of Steve, and even though he didn't know, she had been there the day he graduated from the Naval academy. It was why she knew she had to earn his trust back, and work her way back into his life.. He was a decorated Naval officer and that was a big deal..

"I thought we would have had more time with her.. when Steve told me she was alive, I didn't want to see her.. I wanted to punish her for walking away from his all those years ago, but the moment that Morty told me I'd regret it if I didn't… I knew I had to see her.. and I don't regret letting her back in because I got to spend time with her, and see her as an adult, and see how she was with my daughter".

Nodding her head, she knew that was Steve's biggest thing as well.. They thought they would have more time with her..

"Steve did mention how he didn't want to make you feel you had to see her, but that he was extremely proud when you did come on your own terms.. He respects you and whatever you decided, he was ready to back you up".

Her hand came to rest on Mary's arm and she rubbed her arm softly and gently.. "You would have made her happy as well, knowing that both her son and daughter had given her a second chance, and I know how grateful that feeling is, because I've been there with you both as well, feeling grateful you both have given me a second chance.. I'm not saying that to try to change the subject, I just wanted to say I know how your mother would have felt".

Wiping away her tears, she smiled softly and nodded her head, "Mom loved you, and I know she and Dad would approve of you two trying again.. The last time I spoke to her, she mentioned how she hoped you would both see reason and get back together, that she just wanted her children and granddaughter to be happy".

Catherine couldn't help but tear up at those words.. She had been closer to Doris since she had joined the CIA and though Doris did mention to her often about how Catherine needed to understand that Doris did have regrets about how she had lived her life and faking her death even if it was for the most noblest causes, she knew it had consequences and she did have slight regrets about it.

"Doris mentioned to me that I should not waste too much time away from settling down and being with the one I love and I know she was hinting at my leaving the CIA, coming back here and settling down with Steve, that she had regrets and she didn't want to see me making the same mistakes and have the same regrets she had".

Sipping on her beer, Mary nodded her head and once she had swallowed her mouthful, keeping her gaze towards the water, she sighed softly. "I do know that was a major regret, I know she said to me she would do the same thing all over again, but yet she does still regret the way she did it all.. and I know she wants Steve", she smiled raising her voice just slightly, just changing the inflection just a little, "and you as well to be happy".

It did make her smile, and make her feel like Steve's parents really would have loved to have seen her as their daughter in law, "I appreciate you telling me this.. I also know Mary that your Mom wanted you and Joanie to be happy as well". She took a usb stick out of her pocket and handed it to Mary.. "Your mom gave me this, she told me that you would hopefully understand this more after her death.. It's a video she recorded.. one for you, one for Joanie and one for Steve".

Mary's hand went over her mouth in shock as se took the usb in her free hand, running her fingers over it, her tears welling in her eyes.. Catherine leaned in and pulled her future sister in law in for a hug, "I know it doesn't make it any easier, but lean on others Mary, I'm here, so is your brother.. Danny, the rest of five-o.. They are your family as well.. we're all here for you, I promise you that.. and Joanie, she is going to be one of the most spoiled children on the island with our Ohana".

The two women had always been close from the moment they first met, and it felt like they really forged a bond on this beach tonight.. Two women that loved Steve and wanted the best for him, both women knowing the other woman being in his life would make him the happiest and most settled he had ever been. "I love you Cath, never forget that", were the only words that Mary had to say.. She had heard things like a man's girlfriend and his sister would never get along and she worried that Steve's girlfriend would never accept her, but now after this conversation, she knew she had nothing to worry about..


	43. Chapter 43

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 43**

**Thanksgiving day Eve**

**27th November 2019. **

It was nearly three weeks after his mother had died, and it happened to be thanksgiving day eve.. The last three weeks he had been wondering if they should celebrate it or not, he just didn't feel up to it.. Ultimately it was Catherine and Mary who convinced him that he should, that he still had a lot to be thankful for this year, and that Doris and John would want him to celebrate the day with his family.

Moving on after his mother died, it wasn't quite like when his father died.. He didn't have all this downtime and time to reflect on things, he had hit the ground running and had never quite stopped, so this was new to him.. He had good days and bad.. He had moments where he was feeling more normal and then he would laugh at something, and then all of a sudden feel guilty like he shouldn't be happy fun.

"I still don't feel up to the big game though", he mentioned to Catherine the evening before as they laid in bed after a round of amazing intimacy, snuggling up to each other. He always relished these moments, just being alone with Catherine and feeling safe in her embrace.

She leaned in closer, and kissed him gently, her hand rubbing his back reassuringly, "I'm sure they all understand why you don't feel up to the game.. It is what you remember most about your Mom as a kid, her always taking you to practices and games, and even took you to see Chin's games, so it was a bonding experience for you both".

Sighing he nodded, his own hand trailing up her side, his fingers easing up her hip gently, "I feel like I am letting them down though still by not going". Watching him wrestle with his demons, she knew to let him take a few moments, so she stayed quiet for a moment, letting him gather his thoughts before she spoke. "You aren't letting them down Steve, I know you and I know your sense of needing to belong to a team, but they know you aren't letting them down".

He had wanted to go by the grave site as well on thanksgiving day, they were minding Joan while everyone else including Mary played their their big football match. "I was thinking of taking Joanie to the cemetery and then maybe to visit my grandfather, her great grandfather, show her his name on the memorial ".

Nodding her head she smiled, there was nothing better to her then watching the bond between Joan and her Uncle, it was so sweet and she couldn't wait to see what he was like with his own children since he always treated Grace, Charlie, Joan and Sara like his own. "I think that is a good idea, you and Joanie can have an Uncle and niece morning, the rest of us can partake in the game, and we then we can all have a wonderful thanksgiving feast that Kammi and his family are making us".

Looking into her eyes, he had envisioned her going along with them to the cemetery and then the memorial but he couldn't help but love her more knowing she was taking herself out of the picture for the day so that he could have a day with his niece. He hadn't had a lot of time with her, just the two of them and it was a sweet thought, the two of them could spend time bonding over family, her grandparents and his grandfather..

"I was going to suggest you come with us", his fingers were still trailing around her thigh, leaning in to capture her lips in a soft kiss. Kissing him back for a few moments, she smiled happily, pulling away to look at him.. "And I'd love to, however I think a morning with your niece is just what the Doctor ordered".

How was it she was always so considerate of his needs, and what he needed.. "It means a lot to me, I do love spending time with Joanie, she is a great kid.. I know I had doubts about Mary being a mother when she first adopted her, but seeing her become this responsible mother, and raising a beautiful little girl who is so considerate and kind, I think I know why she did it.. I mean she felt alone in the world.. We both did, and she wanted to take a child who maybe also felt alone in the world and love her".

For someone who didn't spend much of his adult life with his sister by his side, they were certainly making up for it now, and Catherine could tell he meant every word, and that he truly did know her now. "I think you are right.. You both felt abandoned and I think Mary being younger, she wouldn't have fully understood, I mean even you didn't understand till much later in life why your parents did the things they did.. Mary adopting a baby was the most responsible thing she could do because it really was the moment she started to put her life together".

Nodding his head, snuggling in closer to her, he smiled softly, taking her hand in his, "I'm proud of her.. I really am, she is a wonderful mother, a great sister, and a really amazing friend.. She has gone through a lot, and I wasn't there either for a lot of it.. I don't think she understood for a while why I had to do what I did.. being in the Navy.. but she sees it now, and I am really proud of her".

Being an only child, she never knew what it was like to have a sibling, and yet she never felt jealous or envious of siblings.. She knew Steve had regrets about not being there for his little sister more, "Does she know that? Have you told her?" She asked curiously, squeezing his hand gently.

The feel of her squeeze had him feeling butterflies all over, "No, I haven't". The McGarrett men didn't talk much about their feelings, and he only ever really opened up to Catherine and now Danny, "You should tell her Steve, I think she would really love to hear that from her big brother.. You know I'm an only child and yet, If I had a big brother, I'd yearn to hear that kind of praise from him".

Leaning in, he kissed her lips softly.. Mary and Joanie had gotten a place to live on their own now, Steve and Catherine had offered to let her stay for as long as she needed to but Mary and Joan had wanted to find their forever home in Hawaii as soon as they could. She had said it would make them feel at home more if they had a home of their own to live in.

"I'll tell her tomorrow, when we are saying what we are all thankful for". She nodded satisfied and smiled, "I think she will love hearing it, I really love you two are becoming more connected and more of a family unit. Your parents might be gone, but you are both still here". It did make his heart ache knowing their parents were both gone, he had unresolved issues with them both, but he still loved them.

It was going to be a tough day, the first big event since their mother's passing and yet though he felt some trepidation about it, he knew that as long as he had his family by his side, his Ohana, he would be fine. Saying goodnight, and then falling asleep in the arms of his love, he smiled softly, he wouldn't have made it without his family, the family he found and created on his own, and that is what he was grateful for this thanksgiving.

**Authors Notes.**

Thanks again for all the support on my stories, it really means so much. I am sorry I haven't been updated as regularly, I'm back at work and it's harder to get chapters written during the weekday, sometimes I sit on them for a couple of days and flesh them out. I'm really excited at how well Perfect is being received and that will be updated in the next day or so as well. The next chapter for this will be thanksgiving day, I remembered that Steve hadn't wanted to join in the game and so decided to just allow him in my version to go with Joan to pay their respects to their family that had passed as an Uncle/Niece bonding thing.

**SteveMcGarrettLover: **

I really love how you always manage to review every single chapter and I am so glad you liked the last two as well. I wanted them to have that heart to heart each, and I think it really went well. I will make sure to do that at some point the USB port, I think that will be a nice scene to write, for them all to see what they got from Doris.


	44. Chapter 44

**One for Sorrow**

**Pairing: McRoll **

**Spoilers for season 10 - Episode 7**

**Chapter - 44**

Thanksgiving Day

28th November 2019.

Standing on the sand near the water, Steve smiled seeing Mary and Joan splashing around in the water, feeling grateful of what he had in his life. He might not have a mother or a father alive and here to celebrate the day with him, and yet he was smart enough to know he still had a lot of family around him as well. He felt very grateful and thankful to have such an amazing family even though a lot of them weren't blood related.

Being in Hawaii, he truly felt the spirit of Aloha and Ohana, and he knew that blood wasn't what made a family either. It was a bunch of people coming together and being there for each other. It felt even more important knowing they all had chosen to be in this Ohana as well. He clapped his hands together to get Joan's attention and she stopped to turn at the sound of the noise. "Uncle Steve, Happy Thanksgiving", the young girl said with a smile as she came running over to Steve with open arms, and he swung her up into his arms.

"Happy Thanksgiving Joanie.. I was wondering something", he smiled softly at the rapt attention he had from her, her eyes focused on him, "wondering what Uncle Steve?", she asked in a curious voice.. "Well, I was thinking.. I'm not up for the big football game today, so I thought we might go visit Grandpa and Great Grandpa, how would you like that?"

Joanie had never gotten to meet John McGarrett, and it ate away at Steve for some reason.. He knew his Dad would have been an amazing grandfather and would have loved the role of Grandpa, spoiling the little girl even more then he did himself, so Steve and Mary made sure to tell Joan about her grandfather as much as they could, wanting her to know what he was like and that he would have loved her more then anything in the world.

Nodding her head, she smiled and kissed his cheek, her swimmers still damp from her early morning dip in the ocean, her eyes went wide with excitement and she nodded her head, "I'd love to visit grandpa and old grandpa". Joan was old enough to know they were gone, and she couldn't ever meet him, but she did enjoy visiting the grave site and talking to her Poppy.

"Awesome, how bout you go get cleaned up, have a shower and then we'll go grab some breakfast, and head out". She nodded and jumped down out of her uncle's arms and grabbed her towel, and ran inside, "no running inside pumpkin", Mary called out after her, and laughed softly when she picked up the bucket and spade where Joan had been making sandcastles in the sand. "She's just like you bro, always on the run".

He chuckled and nodded, "I can't help it if she thinks I'm awesome and wants to take after her Uncle", he walked over to her and gave his sister a hug, "Thanks for being here today sis, it really means so much". Mary smiled and hugged big brother back, "Honestly bro, there is no place that we'd rather than right here".

Though they might have had bad luck when it came to parents being there for them, they were making up for it now by being there for each other, "You do realise that Joanie is gonna want you to take her out for breakfast right, and you know where as well". He smirked and laughed, taking the pail and bucket from his sister to carry inside, "Ohh I have already made reservations there because I knew they would be busy today".

As they walked up to the house, she put a hand on his arm to stop him, "You sure about the football game?", she knew he loved playing the traditional family football game and it made her heart ache to see him miss out on it. He sighed softly and nodded, "I'm sure Mare.. I mean maybe we can throw the ball around a little later in the day, but I'm happy with being with Joanie today, thanks though Mare".

—

A little while, Steve and Joan were heading out in Steve's truck, her booster seat in the front, but he had made sure to put the seat back as far as it would go and they headed to Joan's favourite breakfast place to get her favourite pancakes.. As they were eating, a familiar face came over to Steve's table.. It was Lori Weston who had worked with Steve and the taskforce years ago when the Governor appointed her to work with them.. "Lori, wow, I didn't know you were back on the island".

She smiled, a small child in her arms and a man at her side, "Hi there Steve, I wasn't sure if you would remember me to be honest". He tilted his head and chuckled, "How could I forget you, it's so nice to see you again.. Have a seat if you like". Lori had been falling in love with Steve all those years ago and it pained her to see him happy with another woman at the time, but she didn't want to be the one to come between a couple in love like Steve and Catherine.

She had since moved on and gotten married and had a baby of her own, he was nearly two years old, "That's a lovely thought, We can't stay though, we have plans, but when I saw you here, I couldn't help but come over to say hello, she gestured to her husband and smiled, "This is my husband Michael, and our son Jason, honey.. this is Steve McGarrett".

Her husband smiled as he leant forward and held his hand out, Steve taking his hand and shaking it.. "Wow, the Steve McGarrett. I have heard so much about you man, it's nice to finally meet you". He knew that Lori had a crush on Steve and had been falling for him when she was younger, there was not much she kept from him but he also knew she loved him now and there was nothing to be worried about or jealous about. He also knew that Lori was curious if the little girl sitting across from him was his daughter but was too shy to ask.

"And who is this little cutie right here", he asked smiling as he pulled his hand away from Steve's and gazed upon the little girl sitting eating her pancakes. Steve smiled proudly and looked at them both, "This little cutie is my niece Joanie, my sister Mary's daughter. We decided to have a little one on one Uncle Niece time this morning, and are gonna head out to the cemetery to visit my Dad and then the arizona memorial isn't that right munchkin".

She looked over at the two people standing to her right and nodded as she took a sip of her hot chcolate, "Yup, then we're gonna have a big thanksgiving lunch at Uncle Steve's house", her eyes lit up with an idea, just like Steve knew his sister's did when she had an idea as well.. "You should come too, Uncle Steve wouldn't mind would you Uncle Steve?"

Steve chuckled and smirked, she was her mother's daughter for sure.. "If you aren't busy this afternoon that is, we have the whole gang there.. Chin and Kono are on the mainland at the moment, but we have a lot of people you should meet, and maybe you might have time to share what brought you back to the island". Lori smiled, nodding her head as she shifted her son in her arms and spoke to her husband with their eyes, something that he and Catherine always managed to do as well.

"Sure, sounds good.. We're free this afternoon so we'll be there". Lori was back on the island permanently now, her husband had taken a job and she had always spoken highly of her time here on the island that they decided as a family to go back. Lori had resigned from Homeland security and wasn't sure what to do with her career, but it would need to be put on hold for a while longer as she had just found out she was pregnant again with their second child. "Around one sound good to you guys?", he asked once he had finished a sip of his coffee.

Michael nodded his head and smiled, "Sure one sounds great, would you like us to bring anything at all?" Having just recently moved to the island, apart from his work colleagues, they hadn't really met anyone else to just hang with and consider to be friends. Lori had still been busy unpacking and taking care of their son, and dealing with morning sickness so she hadn't been up to meeting up with anyone from her time here before yet but this was a great moment to establish some friends, and he knew that Steve and five-o were close going by what Lori always talked about.

"No, not at all, just bring yourselves.. We've got plenty of food, if you have a specific brand of alcohol, you can bring that along if you like, but other then that, just yourselves". He stood up for a moment and shook Michael's hand once more and then leaned in and gave Lori a hug… "It's really great to see you again, I can't wait to catch up this afternoon". Hugging him back, Lori smiled softly, "I can't wait either, it will be nice to catch up and talk about what's gone on in our lives since we last saw each other".

Lori knew about his mother already but out of respect for him, she didn't mention it yet.. She wanted him to feel comfortable broaching that subject with her so she decided she would leave it till later today and hopefully he would be comfortable enough to talk about it with her.. "Anyway", she continued, with a smile.. "I'll let you two get on with your breakfast, we'll see you guys later today".

After they said their goodbyes, Lori and her family walked out to the car, Steve smiling as he watched them walk out. He was glad that Lori was back in town. He hadn't kept in touch with her after she left simply because he could understand that she needed to move on from him and make a fresh start and he had wanted to be respectful of that, but he was glad she was back as he had enjoyed working with her and being a friend to her as well.

"You nearly finished munchkin? We'll head out soon after we visit the bathroom once you are done eating". She nodded once she finished the bite she was chewing. She still had a little more to go, but she never ate it all, and Steve smirked as he used his own fork to steal a bite of her meal. "All done", she exclaimed in an excited voice once she put down her mug after finishing off the last of her hot chocolate. "Okay, we'll visit the bathroom, then pay for our meals and then head out".

Standing up, he picked up her jacket and smiled as she skipped off to the bathroom, Steve following closely behind her. He didn't go into the bathroom with her, but he did like to stand outside the bathroom entry to make sure she was safe in there and no suspicious people went in after her. It was a sad day for him this thanksgiving, but he was even more grateful that he got to spend the day with his family and his sweet little niece Joanie.

While he was waiting, he thought to the annual football game, part of him did want to take part in it, but at the same time, he knew that he would enjoy this with Joan as well.. He had never really spent a whole lot of time with Joan before his mother died, and they moved to the island so he wanted to make up for lost time as well. While he was lost in thought, Joanie came out of the bathroom and took his hand, and he smiled, "Ready freddy?", he asked her softly as he picked her up and put her on his hip, Ready Freddy", she conferred back, snuggling into her Uncle's shoulder as he walked towards the counter to pay for their breakfast, the woman that usually served him waving him off and letting him know it was their treat, they were out the door and on their way back to the car.

**Authors Notes**

First and foremost, I want to thank everyone who has read my stories and supported my writing. It means a lot to me that people take joy in what I write, I feel so honoured to write for these characters and that so many people enjoy them. I am sorry I was away for so long. My Grandfather died at the end of June and so I put all my writing on hiatus while I took some time to process and grieve with my family. I also didn't what my sadness to impact my writing at all, so I decided a break would be a good idea. I am back now and I'm going to start to update my stories. I have three to add on, and then tomorrow I'll try to work on some more of them.

**SteveMcGarrettLover:**

Thank you so much, it means so much that you enjoy this story so much. It's still going very strong and I love it so much. I hope you liked the little cameo in this chapter from someone from season 2.. She will be in future stories from now ones well. The next chapter will be them at John's grave, then the memorial and then the chapter after that will be back at the house..

**Prislynn: **

Aw thank you so much for your kind comments, it means so much to me. I hope you like this latest chapter.

**Armyj88:**

I'm sorry you had to wait a while for the next one, but I'm glad you are enjoying my stories, it means a lot to me.


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